What grow's in the heart
by MizzMarie729
Summary: Sesshomaru defeated Naraku 10yrs ago, he sent Jaken to take Rin away and lived in hiding armless for ten years. But a mysterious old women appears asking Sesshomaru to help Inuyasha defeat the son of Naraku and Kagura. Better Summary inside. RinSessy pair
1. Summary

Summary:

Sesshomaru had defeated Naraku after a long and strenuous battle. In the end he loses his last arm, and unable to protect the only thing that gives him a purpose alive… he sends Jaken to take her and give her a normal life. For ten years Rin grows up in a village where everyone loves her, but though she has forgotten Sesshomaru… she hasn't fully. She happens to see his face in her dreams. An old woman comes into Sesshomaru's cave and offers him his arms, as long as he is willing to use them to defend the lives of humans, youkai, and hanyou's alike. After showing him Rin's future heroic act of saving Jaken and dieing Sesshomaru agrees. On a date Rin gets bitten as well as her date and Jaken doesn't know what to do for it transforms the bitten person into the creature that bit it. Can Sesshomaru save her in time before she turns? And can Rin control the feels she feels? And can Sesshomaru ignore that she is a woman… and that she had always weakened him but strengthened him? Can he hold the beat of his heart inside forever? Or will she bring destruction?

The whole group is in this with the addition of Kohaku, Rin, Jaken, and Sesshomaru. It's a Kagome/Inuyasha Miroku/Sango Sesshomaru/Rin pairing story! Read and give me your important advice or encouragement! A little slow in the beginning.


	2. 1: A living dream

**Authors note: I have only seen a couple of shows and movies and wanted to write a fanfic of this… I hope that it is good to whatever your standards are. Constructive criticism ONLY thank you very much! OH and the first part is about Sesshomaru as most of the story is… of course there is the others how could there not be? )**

**Sesshomaru paved through the mist, which was spread across the cold cave floor like a blanket. He closed his eyes trying to push back his sad thoughts. Unable to control them he plopped onto the floor disturbing the mist. He began to think back to the day Naraku had been finally defeated after all of the pain he had caused. That day was suppose to be the best day of Sesshomaru's life... instead it was the last day of his life. For upon Naraku's death he lost all his reason to exist. He no longer needed to search for Naraku who had killed Kagura, and the day Sesshomaru defeated Naraku he lost his only arm he had left.**

**After Naraku's death, Sesshomaru took Rin and Jaken to a new location to live. It had been long and hard for Sesshomaru began to grow restless and helpless. Rin took good care of Sesshomaru, until one day a hoard of creatures attacked nearly killing all three of them until Inuyasha saved them when he heard the news of monsters heading that way. Sesshomaru feeling guilty and responsible for the young child sent Jaken to take Rin to a new village and to watch her forever, he told them to forget he ever existed. He remembered how heart broken he was when he watched Rin cry as Sesshomaru walked away never to return again. Since that day... he had been in hiding. **

**Sesshomaru sighed feeling his heart tighten at the thought of that little girl that believed so much in him... even when he was armless. She was there for him... she was his to protect, all his and Jaken's. There friend... a human blind to the difference's in them. It had been ten years since had had been in hiding, and was still lonely. Everyonce in awhile Sesshomaru would sneak out and watch over Rin and Jaken at night. Sesshomaru swallowed as he let out a sigh and looked around the dark misty cave that he called his prison. He softly whispered into the air, "Rin... Jaken..."**

**--**

**Rin sat combing her long black hair as she watched herself expressionless. She placed a pretty red flower in her hair before walking out of the room. She smiled when she saw the tiny green guy laying in a hammock snoring. Over the years she began to forget more and more of her childhood but began to think of Jaken as her father. She kissed him on the forehead before grabbing her sack and walking outside. She saw two smiley faced girls wave in her direction as she closed the door tight.**

**"Rin! Oh Rin!" a shorthaired girl waved her hand frantically.**

**"Yes Shata?" Rin asked tying her long black hair back with a red bow.**

**"I heard that someone here has a crush on you," Shata said innocently.**

**"WHAT! Who?" Rin asked all bubbly eyed and curious. Her other friend with curly black hair pointed to a guy who was buying flowers.**

**"Him," her curly haired friend said.**

**"Kayko?" Rin asked almost breathless, "no..."**

**"Yes," Shata said pointing and giggling as he walked their way. Rin straightened up and looked at Kayko. He was the only guy she ever had a crush on, she had never really wanted to get involved with chasing after boys... so this was a big step for her. The brown haired boy smiled at Rin making her blush.**

**"For you," he said handing her a bundle of colorful flowers. Rin swallowed before taking them, something crossed her mind... long white hair, white fur, and markings. She shook her head before sighing and then looking to Kayko. All of a sudden she didn't feel so happy. All of a sudden... her heart was hurting, "Are you alright Rin?"**

**"I have to... go," Rin said smiling at the handsome boy.**

**"Well before you go Rin... I would like to ask you to take a walk with me, and perhaps a picnic on the next rising of the sun?" Kayko asked taking her hand in his. Since when did he like her? He never gave her any attention at all beside friendly ones if that. **

**"I must ask Jaken," Rin said feeling something surround her. It sounded like... the wind talking to her. Something was connecting with her. **

**"Very well," Kayko said smiling before walking off. Rin nodded before backing up and running back to her house. She slammed the door shut before running into her room and slamming the door. **

**"RIN!" Jaken yelled putting down the pan he had been using before walking into her room. **

**"I'm sorry papa," Rin said lying across her bed. Jaken's angry face faded as he watched a gloomy Rin pluck at the pedals of a red flower. **

**"What bothers you child?" Jaken asked trying to jump onto her bed. Rin smiled before helping him up. **

**"I keep seeing that man but he is blurry..." before Rin could finish her sentence Jaken rushed in.**

**"I told you he isn't real! So stop bugging me!" Jaken yelled storming out leaving Rin completely confused. Rin rolled her eyes before chasing after her father.**

**"I have a question," Rin asked in a soft voice.**

**"What is it Rin child?" Jaken asked trying to keep his cool.**

**"Kayko has asked me on a date," Rin said keeping it plain and simple.**

**"No you cannot go!" Jaken yelled frustrated with her.**

**"I'm going!" Rin yelled slamming her door. That night neither of them talked and when Rin was sleeping Jaken slipped out into the cold night. He ran using his staff to guide himself. **

**"Jaken!" a loud voice boomed making Jaken freeze up. He turned out quickly making his eyes widen. **

**"Lord Sesshomaru?" Jaken asked in shock and delight.**

**"How'd you know I was out here?" Sesshomaru asked looking down at Jaken with a stern and emotionless face. **

**"Rin said she saw you in her head," Jaken said bowing in respect before smiling at his old friend.**

**"She remembers me?" he asked Jaken quickly. Jaken shook his head no.**

**"She just said that she saw a flash of white fur, white hair, and markings... I knew that she was tapping into you," Jaken said with a sigh. **

**"How is she?" Sesshomaru said his stern look slowly slipping.**

**"Stubborn, bouncy, loving, and disobedient," Jaken chuckled, "I've grown to love that child as my own. She drives me crazy... and the boys as well."**

**"Hmmm," Sesshomaru muttered before sighing, "so she is alright? It has been a few years since I've last checked on you two?"**

**"She is going on a date..." before Jaken could finish Sesshomaru interrupted him anger crossing his face.**

**"What! But she is only a child!" Sesshomaru growled in anger making Jaken fall back.**

**"No master!" Jaken yelled covering his head. When Sesshomaru finished Jaken uncovered his head, "no master she is not... she has grown into a young women."**

**"A... women?" Sesshomaru asked as if that weren't possible, "but last time... she was so young..."**

**"To us sire she is young but to mortals she has reached young women hood," Jaken said with a sad look on his face. Sesshomaru looked down before crinkling his nose.**

**"It doesn't matter…" Sesshomaru said before turning and leaving.**

**"Master! Are you not coming back? Rin talks of you… I do not know if I can keep convincing that child… women that it was all a dream," Jaken said placing his hands together, "come back to us sire."**

**"I cannot bring danger to you guys… I merely wanted to make sure my last arm was not in vein," Sesshomaru said swallowing when Jaken wasn't looking.**

**"Still strong Youki like I remembered," Jaken sighed, "will you ever come back to us."**

**"Goodbye Jaken…" Sesshomaru said before turning around quickly, "and with your life protect her."**

**"I always have… and always will my lord," Jaken said bowing to his friend one more time. **

**--**

**"It's…" Rin sighed before rolling over in her bed. Jaken walked in looking at Rin who was wide-awake. She sat up fast her long black hair flying everywhere, "was it him?"**

**"Was it… who?" Jaken asked nervously, "I just went for a midnight stroll."**

**"You know him… the one I remember," Rin asked with that same big adorable smile. **

**"He is but a dream… I tell you this over and over again. You do not remember anything from your child hood because you were in a horrible accident when evil youki attacked our village. I was your guardian and fled with you, no one was left alive and you had got amnesia," Jaken said patting her hand.**

**"No Jaken… his face I remember. It is blurry, but oh how unforgettable. Though scary it is almost comforting… like a authority figure," Rin said trying to think up away, "like someone who took care of me, protected me."**

**"No, Rin…" Jaken said wanting to tell her of their master. But how their master had withered away. How he had become dull and useless, almost… lifeless, "you are… tired."**

**"No Jaken," Rin said before seeing her gloomy father lay in his tiny hamick and sigh. Rin tiptoed to him and got onto her knees, she had grown so tall. Rin's once small short legs were now long and thin so even on her knees she was taller then Jaken.**

**"I am sorry papa," Rin said sorrowfully, "I didn't mean to yell at you earlier today."**

**"Oh Rin child…" Jaken smiled at her before looking out the window and listening to a familiar howl. He looked to Rin who seemed to perk right up as well, "asre you alright?**

**"Well I thought… no I'm fine," Rin lied before slouching back down before kissing her fathers forehead. Before she closed the door she said, "Love you papa."**

**"I love you too Rin," Jaken smiled before closing his eyes to sleep, "and don't forget tomorrow we have sword practice with master Tinshee." **

**--**

**The night was cold as Sesshomaru sat gloomily and armless. He heard the pitter-patter of feet and quickly jumped up. He hid behind a rock as a little old woman walked into the cave and sat down beside the fire. Sessomaru rolled his eyes before walking out growling. The old women looked at him not even scared.**

**"You do not quake with terror as other mortal humans as yourself do," Sesshomaru said looking handsome under the light from the moon that escaped into the cave through a huge crack.**

**"Sesshomaru I do not fear youki like yourself for I am not a mortal human. Besides I do not think even a child would run from you these days," the old woman laughed making Sesshomaru glare at her wishing he had at least one hand to strangle the old women, "who would fear a youki with no arms?"**

**"You will fear me," he growled in anger, "now get out before I…"**

**"Do what? Gnaw at me?" the little old women chuckled, "I have come to offer you something."**

**"What could you offer me?" Sesshomaru laughed mockingly. The old women stood up and swiped her hand through the air showing Sesshomaru a vision.**

**--Vision--**

**Women and children screamed as fire burnt down their houses and left them alone in the open to defeat the mass army of monsters. The whole world was on fire as a man laughed… a faceless face. Sesshomaru watched as Rin cut through the men trying to get to a helpless tired Jaken.**

**"Jaken!" Rin yelled as she sliced through a monsters belly. Jaken dodged a arrow but got his head cut off. His blood splattered all over Rin. Rin dropped her sword and fell to her knees looking at the body. She looked up at the men slowly walking towards her laughing. Rin took a deep breath, "I remember… Sesshomaru."**

**--End of vision--**

**"RIN RUN!" Sesshomaru yelled trying to reach her before he was flung back to reality, "where is she what did you do with her?!"**

**"Calm down she is perfectly safe in her bed right now planning on going on a date tomorrow with that handsome faced boy down the block from her. But she will die if you do not stop him," the old women said standing up, "everyone will die."**

**"Who are? Who do you think I can stop armless!" Sesshomaru yelled in anger.**

**"I will give you your arms back, I will give you new arms… if you promise to kill the son of Naraku," the old women said looking at him seriously, "the son of Naraku… and Kugura."**

**"Kugura?" Sesshomaru's eyes widened at her name, he had not forgotten her he had only stopped thinking of her to stop the pain. **

**"You are a dieing breed if you do not take this. Your brother Inuyasha has become stronger, but he cannot defeat the son of Naraku on his own… he needs his brother," the old women said holding her hands out, "walk into my hands if you except this long and dangerous mission."**

**"Uh," Sesshomaru said getting a bewildered look on his face. The old women did not move, and neither did Sesshomaru until he saw his friends die over again. He slowly walked until the woman's hands pressed against his broad chest. A sharp pain shot through Sesshomaru making him fall to his knees as the women stood above him. He looked to his arms that were growing. He gave out a holler of pain as the process seemed to last forever. When the lady was done Sesshomaru laid on the grown twitching from the pain. The lady turned to walk off but before she left the cave she said. **

**"Sesshomaru, you do not know it yet but your heart is bigger then you give credit for. This world depends on how you can cooperate with others, do not try and do this alone for you WILL fail," the old women bowed before turning away. Sesshomaru held his breath trying to push aside the pain until he slowly got hazy and fell asleep.**

**When he woke he looked around before pushing himself up. He looked down at the pair of arms that propped him up. He placed his hand in front of him observing it. He swallowed as he turned his hands over blinking back bewilderment. He jumped up walking to a chest and dropping the lid not use to the arms. They felt weird and alien to him, but he managed to grip his sword and slowly fling it. His arms… they were back. Sessomaru walked out of the cave with his sword in hand before swinging it around smiling for the first time until he caught a scent on the wind. He took off in the direction of the familiar scent as he slowed to a walk. He heard the familiar laughter of a girl.**

**"Rin?" he asked softly as he saw her laughing with a brown haired boy who handed her some fruit. Rin ate nervously as she looked at him. **

**"Rin?" the boy asked scooting closer to her making her uncomfortable. Rin smiled a fake smile as she scooted away a little.**

**"Yes Kayko?" Rin said smiling a dazzling smile.**

**"You are amazing," he said making her smile before he caught her off guard kissing her. She jumped and squealed in shock, and then both looked into the woods when they heard a growl. Rin saw blonde hair and white fur flash past trees. She stood up and looked around frantically.**

**"Did you see that?" Rin asked taking a step forward. **

**"Do not walk further it is probably dangerous… we should leave," a disappointed Kayko. Rin turned to leave when something jumped out tackling Kayko. Rin screamed as she looked at the black goblin creature that had bitten Kayko poisoning him. Rin grabbed a large stick and began beating the creature before others came out. They jumped on both of them as Kayko tried to run away and Rin stood her ground throwing them off of her. A large dog creature jumped out tackling the creatures biting into them. Rin looked at the familiar beast as it tore at the wimpy creatures. Rin beat the other creatures as they bit her on the shoulder and legs. Finally the creatures scattered off further into the woods. Rin breathed heavily before turning to look at the large dog creature. She slowly walked to it; she was only as tall as his knees. She touched his leg before he howled and took off bringing back small images to her mind. **

**Rin ran back to town and grabbed her bow and arrows before taking off for the woods. She ran as fast as possible following the large footprints left by the yokai. Rin made it to a cave about an hour away from town. She stopped feeling an eerie feeling as she stood in front of it. Rin took a step into the cave and heard the low growls in the cave. She accidentally kicked a rock making the creature quickly jump up trying to not fall over. Rin wanted to back up but her body wouldn't let her. The creature stopped growling when he saw her… Rin caught her breath when it plopped onto the floor and transformed. All she saw was blonde hair and fur. **

**"Leave… before something bad happens to you," the familiar voice said making Rin's mouth drop.**

**"I thought… you," Rin said feel shock completely control her smart witted comments, "you were from my dreams…"**

**"You should not see me like this…" he said before making a painful noise. Rin walked to him quietly, "go…"**

**"No… not until I know whom you are," Rin said before walking next to him. She climbed onto her knees, "you are a yokai?"**

**"Yet you do not run for fear of me? Why?" The yokai asked Rin not looking her in the face. "Do you not fear me girl?"**

**"I do not fear you for you did not try and kill me," Rin said, "my father is a yokai."**

**"Your father? I see… I do not have any place for humans so do not mistake that. I was… already tracking down those pathetic excuse for demons," Sesshomaru said sweating. **

**"Look me in the eyes so I may no who you are," Rin said moving some of his hair from his face as he held his burning sore arms. He looked the girl he once watched over in her eyes; though she had grown as all humans did… she still had the same eyes.**

**"You still have those same sweet eyes," Sesshomaru said trying to control his breathing. Rin's eyes squinted before she slowly began to remember. She swallowed before her hand flew to her mouth.**

**"Lord Sesshomaru?" Rin asked with watery eyes. **

**Authors note: **

**This is my first Inuyasha episode… I have only seen like five to seven episodes and three of the movies so I know very little so if this story doesn't appeal to you or if it is incorrect I am sorry. **


	3. 2: I remember you

Chapter 2: I remembered you

Authors note: Sorry if I got a couple of things wrong, I've been researching as much as possible. I hope though it has some goodness in it D well I am going to write some more. Have a nice day. OH and thank you to those who have reviewed… and sorry about the bold. I have been trying to change it but it just wont change.

Sesshomaru looked up at her with tired eyes before closing them. Rin swore she thought she saw a smile before she got water and cooled him off. She looked at his arms as they shook. She bit her lip before putting her long black hair back. She watched Sesshomaru remembering every so-called "dream" of her past she had. She scratched her arm before applying the rag to his head again. She sat back watching over him before falling asleep. When Sesshomaru woke he sat up fast and looked around for Rin.

"Rin?!" he said hastily looking around. Rin walked in holding something she had just caught.

"Lord Sesshomaru I caught you some breakfast," Rin said smiling, "I am much less of a burden then I was."

"So… you haven't forgotten me? I told Jaken…" before he could finish Rin interrupted by plopping on the ground.

"He could never stop me from… now and then I confess you crossed my mind, now and then I guess I had a little too much time," she laughed before handing him the breakfast, "but he told me you were a dream. Why?"

"What?" Sesshomaru asked looking at the once little girl. She still seemed so young to him, perhaps it was that she was human and only ten years passed which was nothing for him.

"I didn't mean to mess up all your plans… I thought about it a lot," Rin said swallowing, "isn't that why you left us?"

"I didn't leave," Sesshomaru said being stubborn, "I wanted to protect you guys. You are better off with me around Rin. I am dangerous and can only cause you harm… and now you are old enough to hear this. You're a human… and I am a youkai."

"Lord Sesshomaru… It's not as if I was unintelligent as a child. I don't think black in terms of gray, or revelations in the light of day, I don't think of cold in terms of ice, or second chances always happening twice. What I think about is me in terms of you, you in terms of us… all of us. I am no different Sesshomaru," Rin said smiling at him. His normal bored face didn't change, but he lifted his eyes up to him, "and you are not as cold as you think… you saved me always saved lord Sesshomaru, you gave me a home. Did… you ever thing of me?"

"You've always been… a understanding child," Sesshomaru said before a small smile came to his face, "I confess you guys crossed my mind every now and then."

"Copy cat," Rin said smiling, "I see your arms are better. Last night… didn't you lose both arms?"

"Rin… I don't think you should be here," he said before he heard a loud frantic Jaken screaming for her. Rin stood up quick.

"I'll be back," Rin said with a smile.

"Don't come back… it is what is best. You are still mine to protect Rin, so stay in your village do not return," Sesshomaru said making Rin glare at him before running off to find Jaken. When Jaken saw Rin he let out a sigh of relief. Rin popped him in the head before walking past him as he fell left and right. Jaken looked up and saw Sesshomaru standing there with his long blonde hair waving in the win as he watched Rin run home. Jaken looked back at Rin and when he turned around Sesshomaru was gone.

Jaken rolled his eyes before walking back to the village to hear screams come from everywere. Jaken looked around for Rin who sat over Kayko's fallen body. Jaken ran up to her franticly. Rin looked at Jaken with watery eyes as she saw the purple and black lines that were growing and bulging around the bite marks. Jaken saw the tears in Rin's eyes as she tried to lift him up.

"Kayko!" Rin yelled shaking her former friend and recent boyfriend. Jaken looked at the boy and to Rin.

"Where you bitten too?" Jaken asked seriously.

"We need to help him," Rin screamed as the boy went into shock. The boy stopped moving making everyone gasp as his whole body slowly transformed. Rin backed up and Jaken did the same as the boy sat up and looked around. His body was transforming as he made a call that made everyone's hands fly to their ears, "KAYKO STOP!"

"That's not Kayko Rin… he's calling Youkai we have to leave," Jaken said grabbing her arm and pulling her.

"No… you lied to me about Sesshomaru. Why?!" Rin said with tear filled eyes, "I admired him… he was my friend."

"Rin he told me to make you forget… I," before he could finish mumbling she took off, "RIN!"

--

Sesshomaru sat crisscrossed by the fire staring into it. He heard the rustling of plant life and the patter of feet. He looked up at a red-faced Rin. Sesshomaru just looked at her curious as to why she deliberately disobeyed his order. Silly things those humans are.

"I thought I told you to never come back here," Sesshomaru said with a small smile. Rin just looked at him.

"Why do you make it hard for people to reach out to you? Why… don't you even try?" Rin asked looking at him, "since a child you pushed me away."

"I've never had a place for humans by my side," Sesshomaru said a bored look still plainly on his face.

"Sesshomaru… then why did you let me?" Rin asked plainly, "it isn't easy to tell you exactly what is on my mind right now… but I've been changing. I've been wondering what to do now… but I realized all along I've been waiting for you. So why did you tell Jaken to make me forget you? Did you think you could erase you from my memory? Youkai, human, or hanyou it makes no difference to me… I remembered you. Aren't… you going, to say, anything?"

"What do you want me to say? Sesshomaru asked looking at her with a serious look.

"That you hadn't forgotten me?" Rin said falling to her knees. Sesshomaru looked at her curiously.

"Why does it matter to you human if I remembered you?" Sesshomaru said not wanting to let these new emotions win over his normal self.

"Because… I am not human and you are not Youkai. I am Rin," Rin said looking at him with a sad face, "and you are Sesshomaru."

"I…" a look of confusion and shock crossed his face, "that is why I wanted you to forget me. Because it is dangerous for a human to find a Youkai the same as her when they are so different. But I had not forgotten you Rin… I sent you away so you could live life. Now go before that all changes."

"I don't want to leave you ever again… I feel safer with you then I have in a protected village all these ten years Sesshomaru," Rin said making him sigh.

'_Even as a child she had a way with me…_' he though to himself trying to not let a smile slip, "I am leaving. I have to go on a search and I cannot stay here long. So go home… and tomorrow I will follow you."

"Do you promise?" Rin asked feeling something painful on her back. She felt weaker and nearly fell over.

"Rin are you alright?" Sesshomaru asked leaping forward and catching her. She lay there in his arms before swallowing.

"I… am tired," she said before passing out. Sesshomaru looked down at the long black haired girl with the sweet face he remembered. She had grown so much in so little time. He lifted her all the way up before walking back to the village as night was falling. Everyone watched the glowing youkai scared as he walked through the village holding the limp girl. Jaken ran out and saw her in his arms.

"RIN!" Jaken yelled trying to run but nearly falling over. Sesshomaru looked at Jaken then to Rin. In ten years Jaken's perspective of Rin had clearly changed.

"Where do I put her?" he asked trying to ignore the gasps and snorts from the men in the village as they stood guard over their women and children. Times had changed men had gotten braver.

"Lord Sesshomaru… this way," Jaken said opening the door as Sesshomaru set her on her bed.

"Jaken once again I leave this girl in your hands, and so far you have done well. I am leaving at sunrise, give Rin this and tell her I am sorry. Tell her… I had never forgotten her. She is the only human I have ever cared about and thought as… one of me. Tell her that she is still Rin and I am still Sesshomaru… and just give this to her," Sesshomaru said tossing a necklace at Jaken and storming off. Jaken held it as he watched Sesshomaru. Over those years… had he gotten softer? Jaken looked at Rin who seemed to be asleep until blood ran down her nose. He heard the screams from the villagers as the place was swarmed with youkai. Jaken ran out throwing fire from his staff. When most had been killed they saw another legion coming.

"ABANDON THE CITY!" Jaken yelled before running inside to see Rin standing over the necklace blood down her nose and dark eyes.

"Were you bitten?" Jaken asked her as she touched the necklace teary eyed. It had a wolf's tooth and a tiny silver pendant.

"He left didn't he?" Rin asked ignoring the shooting pain. She looked over to Jaken who looked at the girl he thought of as his daughter.

"You must understand with lord Sesshomaru there is no happily ever after if he had taken us. We have a shot at normal life…" Jaken said looking at the sickly girl. She looked from him to the necklace.

"It was a time of love and laughter, and it was happy ever after. Even though you made those memories fade… I haven't forgotten I said I would be with Lord Sesshomaru forever. I use to scream out his name you know," Rin said lifting the necklace into her hands.

"Yes… I do," Jaken said softly, "he told me to tell you that he is sorry he had to leave like this. He said something like you are still Rin and he is still Sesshomaru, and that he has never forgotten you for you're the only human you have ever cared for."

"We cannot abandon the city," Rin said sticking the necklace around her neck, "since it is now the only place to call home."

"I am sorry Rin," Jaken said looking at her. Rin just walked to her chest and pulled out two swords. She walked out of the house helping the men fight off the youkai. There was a noise and all of the youkai took off. The men rejoiced until they saw Kayko walk up with a whistle. He blew it but no one heard anything, not until they heard Rin fall to the ground screaming. Something was making her transform, but something was transforming the transformation. Everyone looked as purple and black veins crawled down her bare arms and up her neck. She sat on her knees trying to fight whatever it was. They all watched as the necklace around her pulsed apparently fighting off the transformation. Jaken ran to Rin but was thrown away by some kind of shield. Jaken quickly took off for the forest making everyone look at him.

"DON'T LEAVE US JAKEN!" The people called to him as he climbed hills and through the dark forest.

"Lord Sesshomaru! Lord Sesshomaru wait! Lord Sesshomaru where are you! LORD SESSHOMARU!" Jaken screamed franticly. Lord Sesshomaru walked as the moonlight followed him.

"Could you aware the world I was back any louder Jaken?" Sesshomaru asked raising his eyebrows, "why do you seek me when you know I am leaving?"

"It is Rin," Jaken said teary eyed.

"What about Rin?" Sesshomaru asked a look of peace crossing his face a moment. Jaken took a deep breath.

"It is my responsibly to take care of that child and the only one who can save her is you so I abandoned my people to save her… to find you," Jaken said frantically, "we must hurry. She was bitten, though I see not where I know because right now she is being called to join the youkai… she will become one!"

"What!" Sesshomaru said running past Jaken making him fall over. Jaken placed a hand on his head before standing up.

"Wait for me!" Jaken yelled running after Sesshomaru. When the village came into view Sesshomaru pulled out his sword Tokijin yelling, "Sooryuha!"

"Sesshomaru," a voice came from the once human boy Kayko as he ripped the necklace from Rin's neck. Rin looked to Sesshomaru as she felt Kayko moving the transforming to a quicker pace. Every gasped at her horrific shrill. Sesshomaru flicked his hands as a yellow whip of acid struck Kayko making him holler.

"Sooryuha!" he yelled draining more of the energy he didn't have and knocking down most of the enemy as he turned into his full demon form. He lay down so Jaken could take the transforming Rin who was struggling with Jaken. She grabbed for the necklace not wanting to part with it as Jaken threw her onto Sesshomaru. Jaken jumped up also grabbing hair to hang on as Sesshomaru tore down the enemy with his acid saliva. The villagers cheered as they had been saved.

--

For two days they rode nonstop until it was raining. They had to find a place with the cure. Rin laid on the ground as Sesshomaru looked down at her placing the fixed necklace around her neck. Rin opened her tired eyes looking up at Sesshomaru's blue eyes, purple, markings, and beautiful face. She gently whispered, 'Sesshomaru,' making him give a small smile as he looked down at the human who once ran after him with her arms spread out like a bird.

"I always… wanted, to… fly," Rin said softly in a weak voice, "well I'm flying now."

"Rin," he said softly putting his head down so that his hair brushed her tiny face, "I always thought of you as one of us."

"And I always thought of you as the same as me," Rin said before closing her eyes listening to the sound of the rain outside, "you've always been my best friend…"

Authors note:

I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. I don't get much time to write since I have to take care of my horse's bad foot. So if there is misspelled words and such I am sorry. The last part I wrote to the song, "Listen to the rain," by Evanessance so to get the mood of it I guess you'd have to listen to it. Any ideas as to where it should go from here I'd be more then willing to work in. I have an idea as to where I want it to go but how to get it there is the challenge.

Dsiclaimer: I do not own the series only this plot, and ideas. The characters and stuff belong to the original writer whom I do not know lol!


	4. 3: By his side

Chapter 3: By his side

Authors note: Thank you to my reviewers! Peepsolez, Queenlizrule101, Eleirah, Firefairie93, and ArizonaBay. Keep reading and reviewing… it gets so lonely! And yes this might get a little bit mushy as I try to put Sesshomaru back in order but show how changed he is.

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha, etc. you know the drill.

Sesshomaru laid down feeling the pain in his arms, it happened after everytime he transformed. He would become temporarily crippled and therefore vulnerable. He shook trying to not show his weakness. Jaken walked in looking at Rin who slept in misery. If it weren't for the necklace around her neck she would be answering the call to the youkai. Sesshomaru looked to Jaken trying to get up.

"Do not move master," Jaken said rushing to his side, "what are we going to do about Rin?"

"We are going to find her the cure," Sesshomaru said feeling the pain slowly going away before sitting up feeling dizzy. Jaken looked out at the rain and sighed.

"I cannot lose her," Jaken said sadly. Sesshomaru looked at Rin who was growing sicker by the hour.

"I will not let her die," Sesshomaru said getting up and walking out clearly frustrated with something. He paced through the rain wondering what he could possibly do for the girl. If she turned she'd be lost to evilness, but all he could think of was a place far off out of the way where she could get good treatment. Then he thought of something… there was an herb that would clear any poison. Perhaps that would be strong enough to cure Rin. He walked back to the cave and told Jaken that at first sign of light they'd leave to find her the medical herb called, 'Galsa root.' All night they rested before they took the sleeping girl along the dirt road until they reached a village. Sesshomaru tried to ignore the tension that the villagers gave him. He walked up to a man who walked out to question them.

"What are you doing here youkai?" the man asked ready to defend his village.

"My youngest companion has been bitten by a youkai and is transforming. She needs help," Jaken said pointing at the girl in Sesshomaru's arms. Rin woke up looking around.

"Leave the girl here and we shall help her but you are a youkai and cannot stay," the man said threateningly.

"No!" Rin yelled squeezing Sesshomaru's neck. Sesshomaru did not change facial expressions nor did he move.

"Rin… it is what is best for you," Sesshomaru said looking down into her deep brown eyes. He slowly set her down before walking off.

"No!" Rin yelled to him but he kept walking. Jaken look stuck standing between two. Sesshomaru closed his eyes as he kept walking. Rin pulled away from the villager and ran off in Sesshomaru's direction. Sesshomaru stopped looking behind him, "SESSHOMARU!"

"Rin…" Jaken said softly. Sesshomaru closed his eyes tensing remembering the day he gave Rin the choice to stay with the humans but she chose Jaken and him. She had been so young then.

"Rin go back," Sesshomaru said as she stood in front of him.

"I must look just like a fool to them, here in the middle of the road… standing in front of you. But I don't care; you cannot leave me with these people. It is a long road alone Sesshomaru… and I will not let you go without Jaken and I. Not again," Rin said looking at him. He didn't say a word or change his look, "if it hurt at all leaving us you haven't show it yet. I keep looking for the slightest sign that you missed what you left behind... and I held on longer then I should have Sesshomaru believing you might change your mind. You never came back… until now so I will not be left alone again. I don't trust these people… I am not safe with them. They aren't my friends…"

"Let's go," Sesshomaru said walking forward making Rin gasp before following after him. Jaken let out a breath before taking her hand. For a whole day they walked down a dirt road to the next village. They found a place to camp out before they set up camp. Rin was very quiet as she looked into the crackling flames.

"Are you hungry Rin?" Jaken asked handing her a plate. She took it and picked at it.

"Why do you not eat Rin?" Sesshomaru asked plainly as he ate his food.

"I do not feel good," Rin said as she nibbled at some bread. Sesshomaru sighed setting his food down.

"We'll find away to save you Rin. But you must promise me something," Sesshomaru said as Jaken went outside to gather some fresh water.

"What?" Rin asked sadly making Sesshomaru frustrated.

"Promise that you will not give up if you are called… if things start to look bad you will not give in," Sesshomaru said looking up at the moon, "… I wouldn't want this to…"

"I'll promise if you promise that you won't forget about me… that…" before she could finish he interrupted her.

"Sure," Sesshomaru said trying to hide a smile as he crossed his arms.

"Your arms… how did you get them?" she asked making him look at her in shock. He moved his shoulders as his new muscles flexed before explaining to her. She looked up at him feeling her body tremble and her body slowly bending to the poisons will.

"You do not look well Rin," Sesshomaru said trying to be who he use to be, "sleep."

"I don't want to sleep," Rin said trying to sit up but falling back down. Sesshomaru did not move but he wanted to, "tell me…"

"I was offered arms in exchange for saving the world. Besides if I want to be the most powerful youkai of all I have to have arms… and a world to see me," Sesshomaru said silently.

"I'm glad you got your arms are back," Rin said closing her eyes, "you wouldn't have come back."

"Uh," Sesshomaru said caught off guard. He quickly stood up and walked past the girl and out of the cave. Rin rolled over trying to not lay on her back. She softly touched the necklace that he had left her.

"Sesshomaru," she sighed thinking back to when she was younger, "ten years you've been gone…"

"What bothers you lord Sesshomaru?" Jaken asked curiously. Sesshomaru stood looking up at the moon.

"Rin," Sesshomaru said silently not wanting to talk.

"What did that insolent idiot of a child do this time!" Jaken said squishing his fists together.

"Nothing," Sesshomaru said sighing again, "she's just growing up. She's becoming more of a human women everyday."

"This I know milord but why does it bother you so?" Jaken asked worried he'd send her to live with her kind.

"Leave," Sesshomaru said becoming his old kept to himself self, 'she might decide to leave us to be with her kind,' Sesshomaru thought to himself, 'she is not the same sweet _child_ I knew. She is growing into a woman… that means she is growing up. Adult humans are much different then children. Maybe… I should send her now and save myself the trouble. No… Jaken would never be happy. Perhaps I should distance myself from her; perhaps she does not see me as her protector as she once did. Why do I care about… a human girl? She was always such a sweet child…'

"Sesshomaru?" Rin asked rubbing her eyes and breaking his thoughts apart. He nodded before turning to look away, "Jaken looks worried. I'm sorry."

"What?" he asked quickly as he felt something call to him as if something wanted him to fight. He had an urge to run through the world and to destroy it.

"I'm sorry if I am causing you trouble, I never meant…" before she could finish Sesshomaru started walking off leaving her puzzled. She rolled her eyes before following him. Sesshomaru walked through the forest following the feeling, the hatred, as it got hotter and hotter.

"Go back!" Sesshomaru said turning around and yelling at her. She stopped in shock. He walked towards her with a look she only saw when he was locked in attentive battle. She backed up slightly feeling the necklace around her neck growing hot. Just as he began to walk closer to her something shot from the ground throwing both of them back. Rin hit the ground with a thud and Sesshomaru went through a tree. He slowly got up now prepared for the giant serpent that was facing Rin. It radiated hate. Jaken came running out feeling the awkward feeling and seeing Sesshomaru facing the back of the creature.

"Rin! Rin!! RIN!" Jaken yelled trying to run to her rescue as she slowly got up reach around for her sword but finding nothing. The creature then attacked her its large mouth open revealing ugly sharp teeth. Rin screamed as she curled up and the creature was flung back. Sesshomaru had grabbed it by the tail and tossed it around letting it fly off into a tree. The serpent hit the ground before recoiling and attacking again. Jaken helped Rin up before telling her to go back to the cave as she was beginning to look pale. She ran off tiredly but grabbed her sword. She stood there feeling something weird pulse through her. A new strength, almost as the youkai poison mixed with the protection of the amulet gave her power strength. She ran as fast as she could back to the scene where Sesshomaru and Jaekn were fighting the youkai serpent.

"Dokasso!" Sesshomaru yelled as his acid whips came out whipping the creature making it hiss. When that did not work he sliced at the demon. Rin leaped into the air with a feeling of power as she sliced through the creatures heavy armor making it forget about Sesshomaru giving Sesshomaru a chance to do his ultimate attack, "Sooryuha!"

"Sesshomaru!" Rin yelled as it flung it's tale towards Sesshomaru. Hearing her call he noticed the sword like tale flying in his direction. Then he noticed Rin looking at him instead of the large mouth about to claim her as it's dinner.

"RIN!" Sesshomaru yelled as he ran towards her. It all seemed to be in slow motion. She looked at him with curiosity and for the first time thought about how handsome he really was. Jaken looked back at Sesshomaru before looking to Rin and then running towards her. Rin looked at them before looking back to see the large mouth engulf her. Jaken stopped and fell to his knees as Sesshomaru lifted his sword. This time he would not miss… this time, "SOORYUHA!"

"Rin! Rin!" Jaken cried out flopping around as if giving a funny prayer. The Sooryuha hit the serpent making its body shatter into a million chunky bloody pieces. But there on her knees with her sword in the ground and a weird shield dripping off poison from the creatures mask sat Rin. Jaken held his breath and Sesshomaru let out his as he slowly walked to her. Jaken ran trying to get to her but when Rin opened her eyes the first thing she saw was Sesshomaru and so the first thing she did was jump into his arms catching him off guard and making Jaken's eyes widen in fear as his hands hit his head.

"Rin…" he said grabbing her by the shoulders so he could peal her off of him. She realized what she had done and quickly pulled her self away.

"Lord Sesshomaru I am so sorry…" she began talking really fast.

"It is alright for now, are you alright?" Sesshomaru asked looking her over. She quickly nodded her head after swallowing so loud even Jaken could hear her, "then how did you do that? You have not a scratch nor acid burn on you?"

"I… I don't know," Rin said nervously as she looked up into his golden amber eyes. He sighed before looking away. When quickly glanced back at her he saw the necklace he gave her softly pulsing.

'My mother' amulet,' he said in his head as he looked at it, "your fine we can move."

'Well he's back to himself,' Rin thought sighing before following behind him. A small smile came to her face making Jaken frown in understanding. When they had reached the cave they packed their belongings and began walking. Sesshomaru was far ahead as Jaken and Rin fell behind.

"You idiot," Jaken whispered softly to Rin making her look at him in shock as they walked through the green grass.

"What!" she shrieked making Sesshomaru's ears twitch. Rin placed a hand to her mouth before repeating her statement quietly, "why am I an idiot?"

"You are letting your human… instincts take charge Rin. You are going to get us separated if you keep showing affection for our lord…" before he could finish silently scolding Rin he was interrupted.

"Jaken, Rin… I do not like when people talk behind my back," Sesshomaru said softly.

"We weren't!" Rin said feeling a little sick but better. Sesshomaru stopped and Jaken jumped on Rin high enough to where he could cover her mouth.

"Yes lord Sesshomaru, sorry lord Sesshomaru," Jaken said still holding her mouth shut, "can't you hold your tongue even for a moment child?"

"I am not allowed to speak my mind?" Rin said with her hands on her hips.

"No you are to keep your mouth shut!" Jaken said pointing a finger up at her before she punched him in the head and returned to walking. Rin crossed her arms walking further ahead leaving Jaken lying on the ground with a bump on his head.

When the three had reached a good resting place they all settled down. Sesshomaru slowly walked off towards a creek where he sat. He heard Rin and Jaken fighting all the way back to camp. There were thuds as Rin and Jaken tried to out do the other. Rin gave in as Jaken pushed her towards the river where Sesshomaru sat. Rin sighed before standing in front of her lord. Sesshomaru did not look up at her.

"I'm sorry," Rin rolled her eyes trying to not show that she was wrong. When he said nothing she dropped her shoulders got a dump founded look on her face, "lord Sesshomaru?"

"Hmm," he said making her slump further.

"I am sorry… that I disobeyed you," Rin said finally fully giving in, "I am sorry that I talked back to you for you are my lord."

"Hmmm," he said sighing and tensing as he listened to the sound of her voice. He closed his eyes listening to the sound of the wind, the river, and her voice. Peace all at once… freedom.

"Lord Sesshomaru," she said poking him and jumping when he looked at her, "sorry!"

"Rin!" he yelled as she ran off scared of what he would say and Jaken would do. Jaken went to run after her.

"You foolish girl! Get back here!" Jaken yelled running after her before Sesshomaru stopped him. Jaken stopped and looked at her, "oh please lord Sesshomaru please don't send her away."

"I will not force her," Sesshomaru said sighing, "to do or be anywhere she doesn't want to be."

"Lord Sesshomaru?" Jaken asked curiously.

"Silence," Sesshomaru said walking slowly as if in deep thought as to what to do with them. He sighed pacing further and greener in the forest. Everything was a blue green as the beauty of nature surrounded him. Rin slowly walked up to him with her head hung low.

Lord… Sesshomaru," she said biting her lip with her hands behind her back. He looked at her and thought a moment.

'Is she something that can't be lived without? Is it how after all these years she is still as sweet as a child? Or… something… never,' he thought to himself making Rin look at his funny facial expression.

"Uh… lord Sesshomaru?" Rin said on her knees facing him with her face in his. He opened her eyes and looked at her, "I'm sorry for running off. I'm sorry for being disobedient. I'm sorry if I have been a burden for you."

"You know Rin… you do not have to stay," he said looking at her plainly as he always did though his head and heart screamed, 'DON'T EVER WANT TO LEAVE.'

"Wha… what?" Rin asked swallowing and backing away.

"I mean I am not going to hold you here. You are free," he said before looking away. She perked straight up looking at him with a look of shock.

"B…ut, b, uh… oh," she couldn't seem to figure out something to say. She slowly stood up nervously. He watched her as she left.

'I knew she wanted to leave,' Sesshomaru said before turning his head, 'we will reach a village soon where she will be treated. She will no longer need me and then I can move on with my life. I can…'

--

The next day they traveled to find a healer. They walked through the village ignoring the awkward looks from the villagers. They asked the people if there was a healer and were finally directed to a women named Kettla. The woman was a very warm and welcoming woman. She had seen many injured humans and youkai, even a couple of hanyou's.

"So what may I help you with?" the old women said seriously. She looked at the sickly looking girl.

"My daughter… I mean my companion…" before he could finish Rin looked to Jaken and interrupted him.

"I am his daughter… just not by blood," Rin said catching both Sesshomaru and Jaken off guard. Jaken had always known Rin thought of him and called him father, but never openly told people.

"Clearly child," the women said making Rin glare at her.

"What does that mean! Just because we aren't the same species! Or color… or anything doesn't mean he isn't my father," Rin said making Jaken smile and Sesshomaru look at her a little differently. It was one thing to be near, around, or with a youkai and to consider them the same, but is totally different then admitting it to another human.

"Calm down child… I only meant that it is clear he is not your blood father. But you seem very similar, and it is very precious that he sees you as a daughter. But let's talk business now. Who am I seeing and what am I seeing them for?" Kettla said looking at Rin, "is it you child? You look sickly."

"She's been poisoned," Sesshomaru said simply.

"By what? I am not a mind reader," the women said frustrated.

"Does it matter?" Sesshomaru asked glaring at the women.

"Look youkai I can help your companion but attitude is not accepted," the old women said crossing her chunky arms.

"Let us leave," Rin said hastily, "clearly she doesn't deserve our business."

"Who is he that he is so great?" the old women said frowning in anger.

"Lord Sesshomaru! The greatest of the great!" Rin said defensively, "The greatest man I've ever known. Besides Jaken my father of course."

"Rin!" Jaken said in shock making Rin blush as she had gotten carried away. Rin looked to Sesshomaru who she swore for a moment was looking at her differently. She fell forward feeling the poison kicking in again. This time Sesshomaru caught her.

"We… should go," she said breathing heavily. Was she really going to leave on the sake of him?

"No," he said simply making Jaken and the old woman look up at him. Rin slowly looked up at him as he held her up by her elbows afraid to touch her anywhere else.

"No?" Rin asked trying to catch her breath.

"How much do you want?" Sesshomaru said looking to the old woman. She looked at the girl who was beginning to turn green.

"Five gold pieces," the old women said as Sesshomaru set the girl down and pulled out his money and handing her what she asked of him. He helped Rin up as the old lady took a hold of her, "you may want to go outside."

"Yes," Jaken said marching out thankful someone would help her. The old women helped her take her top off. Sesshomaru peeked back to see the bareback and side of her breast before slowly turning away. Just as he did he saw the black spot where she had been bitten, black and green veins spread out trying to overcome her. Sesshomaru looked back up once more to see the pain across her face. He couldn't help but notice that she had grown. It was so hard to see under her outfits. The old women observed it taking a sample and figuring out what kind of poison it was. She walked out to where a worried Jaken and calm Sesshomaru sat waiting, "what news do you bare!"

"The poison is seeping through her body, yet I do not understand yet why she has not turned into the youkai that had bitten her. I know it sounds impossible for a human to turn into a youkai, she wouldn't be an actual youkai she'd be like one… only with a much colder heart," the old women said making Sesshomaru grunt. The old women looked to him before going on, "I don't know if what I can do for her is enough. I will try what I know, it should work but if not you will have to seek help in Gamla village."

"Hmmm," Sesshomaru said looking off making the old women turn around. She crushed herbs and mixed it together to make a paste. Rin opened her eyes to look out the window at Sesshomaru who sat so calmly. A tear rolled down her eye. The old woman saw it and looked out to see the handsome blonde haired youkai.

"What bothers you?" the old women asked curiously. Rin looked at the old women.

"I think my companion… Sesshomaru is going to leave me here once he knows I am alive. But if he is going to leave again… I'd rather not live," Rin said sadly. The women looked gloomily at Rin. Sesshomaru stood up and walked to see how she was doing when he heard his name mentioned. He stopped to listen.

"Then stay here with me, I will teach you that art of medicine," the old woman said kindly, "there is no place for a human with youkai's child. Your place is with humans."

'Rin must have told her… she wanted to stay here,' he thought before turning and walking away, 'I shall give her what she wants. She is not mine to claim.'

"As nice a offer as that is… my only place is by his side. Or at least behind him. I just got him back… I cannot let him go again but I do not think I have a choice," she said as the women rubbed in the medicine, 'he has become all I live for. I'd die just to hold him, to stay with him… somehow I'll show him that he's my nights sky. I've always been right behind him. I will be right beside him… I will.

Authors note: Sorry if that is a bit mushy… but I am trying to get somewhere with it. Still making decisions on whether I want certain things to happen. Next chapter will have Inyasha and others in it. My promise to you! Just keep reviewing… give me courage!


	5. 4: Not alone

Chapter 4: Never alone 

Authors note: SPRING BREAK! I have more then two to three hours to write wahooo! This so far has been slow and for that I am sorry do not give up on me! I am working harder now that I have time lmao! Sorry there hasn't been many chapters ha ha ha I keep getting stuck as to how to take this as to where I want it. Hmmm Inuyasha and the others should be in this chapter… I wonder what has happened with them.

Disclaimer: Once again I do not own the Inuyasha series repeat I do not own the Inuyasha series.

Rin lay there as Sesshomaru watched intentivly. He began to wonder if she was the same little girl he had saved. He knew at that moment that he had saved her for a reason; he saved her for a reason far beyond the knowledge of him or anyone. But he was still hers to protect. But did she still want him to protect her? It is a funny thing time… human's age so fast. How could little Rin already be a young adult? He sighed… he seemed to do that a lot. Rin softly murmured his name making him look to her quickly.

'Wa… was she dreaming about me?' Sesshomaru thought in shock. Rin's eyes seemed to be fluttering while they closed. She said his name softly again this time she sounded more serious and more scared. Sesshomaru looked at her and realized she must be having a nightmare. He swallowed before standing up and slowly walking out of the tiny hut. He paced through a field of flowers near by looking at the flowers and think about the feelings he refused to realize… were there.

Sesshomaru was a youkai, a powerful lord. He had no business nor time for humans, he never had. So what was so different about this one? When he looked down into the field of beautiful pink and purple flowers… one flower stood out. A simple weed, more beautiful for it's differences… a dandelion. He slowly bent down to pick it up. He twirled it between his fingers before standing up and walking further. He looked out at the lands as he thought harder, 'what could she provide me with… by keeping her here? Every time she looks at me a certain way… it burns me with the coolest pain I'd ever felt.'

--Flashback--

"Sesshomaru-sama!" a little girl yelled running through a field of flowers towards Sesshomaru. He looked to her and nodded.

"Rin," he said softly as she gathered flowers and placed them in her hair.

"We're going to be together forever right? Even though I die right?" she said as she very delicately slipped a dandelion between her ear and head.

"Rin…" before he could tell her that someday she would be a grown up and have to make decisions without her, that he wouldn't always be able to save her she interrupted.

"What is this Sesshomaru-sama?" she said twirling a pretty yellow flower between her fingers, "it's so tiny and feeble Sesshomaru-sama."

"Like you," Jaken chuckled not having much taste for the human child.

"Jaken," Sesshomaru said in his deep voice. Jaken froze and turned to his master, "leave."

"Yes lord Sesshomaru," Jaken said before running off to get their mount Ah-un ready.

"What does master Jaken mean Sesshomaru-sama?" Rin asked teary eyed, "what does he mean like me?"

"Rin," Sesshomaru said sitting down and giving the girl permission to sit he began to explain, "Do you see this dandelion?"

"What? Oh these yellows flowers?" Rin asked gloomily looking at the dandelions.

"Yes those flowers Rin… you are like these flowers. They are not exactly flowers but weeds, yet they are still beautiful. But they are better then a flower… they are stronger. But they do not live as long," Sesshomaru said struggling to find kind words. Words he had never used let alone together.

"Oh," Rin said sighing, "so I am a dandelion?"

"You are like a dandelion. You are a human I am a youkai. We are different," Sesshomaru said struggling to find the words.

"No we aren't," Rin laughed as if it was ridiculous. Sesshomaru looked at her with confusion, "I am Rin. You are Sesshomaru."

"Rin… you must go with Jaken away," Sesshomaru said making the girl jump angrily. He grabbed her hand and pulled her down, "I am not finished Rin…"

"He can't stand me! Do not leave me please!" Rin squealed angrily.

"Jaken!" Sesshomaru said looking at the little girl sadly, "you must go with him and forget about me. My fake arm will only last for one more day Rin after that I can no longer protect you. I must know I did not save a human for no purpose."

"Why do you still call me human?" Rin asked sadly. Sesshomaru looked at her with the same cold face he always had.

"Because that is what you are Rin. You are too young to understand our differences. You belong with your kind. Goodbye Rin," he said before getting up and walking away. Jaken held her as she tried to run to him.

"Sesshomaru-sama! Sesshomaru!" she yelled for him but he kept walking away so he could hide and cause no more problems.

-End of flashback-

Sesshomaru carried the tiny dandelion back to the village as Jaken sat nervously. Sesshomaru shoved the flower in his pocket trying to ignore it's heavy sent. The old women walked out with a sad look on her face. Jaken stood up quickly. Sesshomaru followed pursuit but slowly. Jaken waited anxiously.

"She is not doing well. She needs more care then I can provide for such a sickly child. I do not know what else to do, except refer you to a good potion maker. But be warned he does not take kindly to Youkai," the old women said seriously. Sesshomaru looked down then back up, "but I do not know if she can make it. It is a six day travel from here."

"What do we do then? We don't have Ah-un to travel us far and wide," Jaken said gloomily, "I let him return to his homelands."

"I will carry her when she cannot walk," Sesshomaru said coldly as if it was no big deal though really he worried inside.

"Then you should leave now," the old women said looking in at the sleeping girl, "let her get dressed first."

"Of course," Jaken said bowing much grateful. The old lady woke up Rin and told her she had to go to another village where they could perform the right potion on her. Rin blinked and got sucked into a daydream of some sort.

--Vision--

"Master," a man with long black hair and heavy armor kneeled to a man and a child. The child had growing blonde hair and ears. Was it Inuyasha?

"What is it?" the man standing beside him said.

"The armies are not yet fully ready to be let loose. They need more power," the black haired army personnel said holding his helmet in his arms.

"Prepare them fast we much seek revenge for my father," the boy said looking at his soldier, "now leave my sight."

"Yes milord," the man said to the ten-year-old child.

"Someone has been tapping into our conversation," the handsome younger boy said before looking in Rin's direction. A pain ran through her body before she pulled herself out of there.

-End of vision-

"Rin!" Jaken yelled shaking her making her snap out of it. Rin shook as if she had seen an army of dead men surround her.

"So cold," was all she could say she shivered and looked around, "he… I…"

"What is the matter Rin?" Sesshomaru asked the terrified girl. She looked at Sesshomaru letting his warm golden eyes warm up her icy brown ones. Her breathing got normal and finally she looked away.

"A young boy, a scary man, and a deadly soldier. The son of Naraku has come to avenge his father's death. Sesshomaru you must hide," Rin said frantically, "he reeked of death."

"I do not fear a son of a dead man," Sesshomaru said angry in her lack of confidence in him. He stood up and walked out making her feel bad.

"Rin apologize child," Jaken said getting tired of her making their lord angry with her. She always had to act like she knew it all. Rin sighed before slowly getting up and stumbling out to find Sesshomaru.

"Sesshomaru," Rin said standing behind him. She looked at how his hair blew in the wind. She could feel the beat of her heart. Why… did it beat like that? Did his beat to a different beat?

"Rin," he said softly, "do you not believe in me anymore?"

"Huh?" she made a noise in shock as she looked taken back, "milord never…"

"Then why do you not trust I can protect you from this son of Naraku?" Sesshomaru asked looking at her anger stretching across his face, "am I not the same Sesshomaru I was?"

"I didn't say that milord!" she said angrily. Sesshoumaru looked at how her face had changed as it crinkled into an angry one that made him want to laugh, "What is so funny?"

"Your face Rin!" he chuckled. She didn't know whether to laugh at the fact he was laughing in front of her, or to yell for the insult, "excuse me! I cam to apologize but if your just going to insult me then I'll come back later."

"Rin," he said smiling at her for the first time since he had been back to his normal self, "I meant no insult or injury. You humans are so touchy."

"You've always thought of me only as a human haven't you?" she said with a seriousness he could not even attempt to laugh off. His face went back to one of concern, "all I ever did was try to show you I was worthy to just travel with you, to stand behind you, as long as I got to stand near you. And you always thought of me as a human…"

"Rin," he said trying to get a word in but she turned and walked off, "fine if she wants to be stubborn then let her!"

Sesshomaru met them back at the village to pack his things. Rin and him did not say a word on the travel out of the village. Everyone kept their eye on their children as the imp, human, and youkai walked through the dusted village. Once they were clear of it they walked down a dirt road that lead to a small forest. Things were tense as Jaken could feel the steam from both Sesshomaru and Rin. Sesshomaru looked over at Rin who had her arms crossed and her nose in the air and he turned his head making a grunting noise. Rin looked to him and stuck her nose higher in the air before tripping over a root and falling flat on her face. Jaken ran to her side and helped her up. She pushed him off before aggressively wiping off the dust. Sesshomaru looked to her with what she swore was a sad face, but just as quick he turned away.

'What a clumsy fool that human,' he said walking in frustration, 'what are these feelings!'

"Hmmm?" Jaken asked looking to Sesshomaru who muttered softly under his breath. Rin began to remember all the fairy tales her parents use to tell her about love. Never were they like this. Then again she wasn't in love… was she? She wouldn't allow it… to love someone who thinks of you as basically one of the enemy.

"We should settle down soon," Sesshomaru said making him think about settling down. Who would he settle down with? Would he ever settle down? Naraku had killed Kugara… and… then there was Rin. But she was a human so she was out of the question. Sesshomaru looked at Rin uncomfortably and quickly hastened his pace. Rin could feel her body dieing but she would not worry them, she knew the minute that she took the necklace she'd either fight the transformation and die, or she'd transform into a strong evil youkai. They had camp set up and Rin walked off trying to seem okay before letting loose as she puked up green and black colored vomit. Rin wiped off her mouth before jumping when she heard someone walk behind her.

"Sesshomaru," she said feeling a headache come along. He just looked at her under the rising silver moon.

"Are you alright?" Sesshomaru asked her after the fight they had had.

"I will be," she lied not wanting to tell them that she didn't have longer then two days before she would be close to death. Before she died she had to tell him how she felt even if it was the next day, "you seemed bothered? Is it because… you should know Sesshomaru. I… I've never stopped trusting and believing in you. Which is why… I know I must tell you."

"Is something bothering you Rin?" he asked his facial features not changing. She scratched her head as she looked up at him.

"Your not alone. Together we stand; I'll be by your side… I'll take your hand," she said reaching out and grabbing his hand, "when it gets cold, and it feels like the end Sesshomaru I won't give in. Keep holding on, because you know we'll make it through. Just stay strong… because I am here for you."

"Rin what are you doing?" he asked looking down at his large hand in her tiny on.

"I am telling you that before it is to late this could all disappear. Before the doors close… and it comes to an end, with you by my side I will fight and defend," she said catching Sesshomaru off guard. He didn't know how to react to her open up to him exposing her feelings.

"Rin… let go of my hand," was all he could say realizing he could accept it. She looked up at him realizing he was rejecting her in everyway possible.

"If I could be that little girl again to please you I would," she said getting watery eyes. Sesshomaru looked away before swallowing.

"Rin leave," Sesshomaru said his jaw tensing as he closed his eyes.

"There is nothing you can say, there is nothing you can do, there is no other way when it comes to the truth…" she backing up slowly. When she got no response she decided to stop fighting the poison, she turned around in defeat.

"I knew… eventually she'd seek what I can only deny," he said softly, "she is a human and I am a youkai. That would only make for a weak spot… it would be easy for her to get hurt. She is a human, they change their minds quickly…"

"Rin?" Jaken asked as Rin quietly sat down staring into the fireplace, "my child what bothers you?"

"I have decided that if I live through this… I will go my own way, and no longer bother lord Sesshomaru. I am nothing but a burden for him," Rin said with teary eyes.

"What did you do this time!" Jaken said being livid, "what do I have to fix?"

"Confessed" Rin just looked at Jaken with watery eyes as she opened her mouth to speak, "I'm the one who is deciding to leave. You must understand my choice. I do not expect nor ask you to follow me."

"Rin wait!" he yelled as the girl ran off into the forest alone. Jaken knew he could not leave all of there stuff unattended he too would surely get the boot. But would that be so bad? He wouldn't have to leave his Rin.

Rin looked at one of her swords she had brought with her. All her training was useless compared to Lord Sesshomaru's skills. Why would he need her? She had no purpose? So why not take her life right there? Why not end her suffering… since the only reason she had been fighting it was to be with lord Sesshomaru. His name alone brought tears to her fragile eyes. Her heart had been speared, shattered, and yet she didn't understand why. As she grew up she remembered his face and thought she dreamt of him because he was her soul mate. She didn't realize that he was from her past. But still her feelings grew from that moment one; she was a young woman… who had a path to follow. They just didn't know that the path of a youkai and a human was to combine and spare the world of pain and troubles. The simple love a youkai and a human girl, not just a human girl… but a human girl in love with a youkai could change the course of the world.

She placed the blade towards her chest feeling the tip of the blade as tears streamed down her face. She let out a sob before dropping the blade onto her lap and gripping a handful of her hair from the front and sobbing into it. She heard the crackling of twigs and looked up trying to hide her tears afraid it was Sesshomaru. But the creature that had come out was not Sesshomaru but looked like a giant snake almost like the one she had fought before and almost been devoured by. Only this time it wasn't radiating hate… but it was covered in spikes and she could smell the poison pouring from its scaly body. She sat looking at it not moving, not even afraid. The rain began to pour as the two stared at each other.

--

Sesshomaru had returned moments after Rin had disappeared into the forest. Jaken looked at Sesshomaru not wanting to say anything. Sesshomaru felt the tension from Jaken, but didn't want to bring it up. Jaken looked into the fire before sighing trying to hint Sesshomaru of something. He let out another deep sigh that made Sesshomaru shoot a glare at him with an irritation.

"Why do you try and irritate me Jaken?" Sesshomaru said in anger as he began to pace. Then he stopped and looked around curiously, "where is Rin?"

"If you had taken my hint milord I would have asked you what my child I mean Rin did to make you tell her she has to leave? It must have been bad enough that she tried to make it seem she was the one choosing to leave," Rin said looking at Sesshomaru.

"I did not tell her to leave. We had… a misunderstanding that is all. Where is she perhaps I will talk to her," he sighed looking at his servant as he thought, 'she actually wants to leave!'

"That way not too long ago and she looked distressed. She said that she is leaving because she has been nothing but a burden for you. If you have decided to… send her with her people I beg that you let me go with her. If you wish me with you I shall not disobey you my lord," Jaken said bowing.

"I would never take you from her, nor would I force her to do something she didn't want to," Sesshomaru said silently, "I remember you hated humans and hanyou's. What made you change?"

"Live with that girl as long as I did… you'd undoubtedly love her unconditionally. I watched her grow; I got to be the father I never got to be… I got the daughter I never knew I wanted," Jaken laughed, "such a thickheaded girl. Stubborn and unruly, but same kid spirit. You would be surprised of the amount of love you can grow for that girl… how much you can love a human, as if they were your own."

'I think… I might already,' Sesshomaru said as the fire cracked along with his golden amber eyes, "I shall find her. I will return with _your daughter _shortly."

"Master," Jaken said setting up her bed and humming. As Sesshomaru walked through the forest he could hear the sound of sobs in the distance and the smell of what smelt like youkai in the distance. Once he got past a large bush he saw Rin sitting on a rock looking at a serpent. Sesshomaru watched walking carefully afraid to disturb the serpent incase it was just watching her. He could smell the potent poison a strong enough smell to kill any human yet she was still sitting there looking at it. She looked down at the sword, which made the snake twitch as it move towards her a thirst for human blood written in the way it flickered its tongue. The rain clumped her hair together but did not hide the tear streaks down her face. As if in slow motion she lifted her sword and he thought she was going to fight but she tossed it forward a look he had never seen on her face before… lost.

"RIN!" he yelled making her look to him as the serpent stroke at her but no movement came her way before someone swung from a vine slicing at the serpent. Rin looked at the serpent that flung back as a boy with black hair in a ponytail stabbed the serpent in the head, "Sooryuha! Rin… why didn't you run? Why didn't you fight?"

"No reason to," Rin said looking blankly into Sesshomaru's eyes… her once full of energy eyes were empty.

"Rin how could you say that?" Sesshomaru said grasping her upper arms as he stared at her through the rain. Had it possessed her, "did… did it posses you?"

"No," Rin shook her head before pulling away leaving him in shock.

"Then why did you… hey aren't you Inuyasha's older brother Sesshomaru?" a boy asked catching Sesshomaru off guard so that he stood in front of her protectively.

"Who are you?" Sesshomaru said look at the young male. He looked nearly twenty.

"My name is Kohaku Sango's younger brother," Kohaku said placing his half-moon shaped sword away, "you must be Sesshomaru."

"Kohaku!?" Sango yelled as she cut through the brush. She stopped making Miroku run into her followed by Inuyasha, and Kagome. Sango nearly fell over but caught herself and held her look of surprise.

"Sesshomaru?" Inuyasha asked looking at him with curiosity.

"Inuyasha," Sesshomaru said casually. They had amended and forgiven each other for things from the past… but they hadn't quite yet learned to forget. They had even helped each other out a few times since Naraku's death, but they were still not showing that brotherly affection most brothers had.

"Kagome? Sango?" Rin asked stepping out from behind Sesshomaru.

"Rin?" the two asked looking at her. Kagome smiled at the young women, "you look so grown up!"

"I am," Rin said walking past Sesshomaru who tried to catch her but she walked past. Kagome and Sango hugged the girl as Inuyasha, and Miroku just shook her hand. The others looked at Sesshomaru who wasn't looking at them… but Rin, "I… remember you."

"Yeah," the boy gave a small laugh before kicking the dirt, "sorry about that."

"No problem," Rin said smiling at him. His brown eyes and dark hair hadn't changed look wise but he had become quite a catch.

"He would have killed you if I hadn't stopped him," Sesshomaru threw in. Rin looked back at him. Why was he getting so defensive? Rin bent over feeling a pain as Kohaku caught her and the others went to go to her but the earth began to tremble. Kohaku fell over with a sick Rin as Sesshomaru ran to her lifting her up. The others tried to catch their balance as the whole earth moved. A large snake larger then the others they had fought appeared. Rin looked up in fear gripping Sesshomaru's clothing, 'now she's scared. What a weird human.'

"Who killed my sssssonssss? Who sssslaughtered my boys?" the mother of the two they had killed saw the dead body of her youngest son, "oh Sssshaken! You will pay!"

"W…wait," Rin said shakily feeling the hatred ratite off of her like no other. Even she could feel it a little, but really it affected everyone except her.

"I will slit you into a million pieces!" Sesshomaru said leaping into the air as it dodged its poisoned spit. Inuyasha leaped in front of Rin grabbing her and saving her from the acid. Sesshomaru saw this sliced at the large mama snake before turning on Inuyasha, "do you think I can't even save my own companion? Why do you always but into my business!"

"Yeah well maybe if you were as half as good as you use to be you wouldn't have left her out in the open you idiot!" Inuyasha yelled as they growled at each other.

"I will rip you apart as well," Sesshomaru said slicing at Inuyasha as he jumped out of the way. The others began to occupy the large snake as she manipulated them to fight with each other and not work together well. Rin ran to where her sword laid on the ground. Inuyasha swung his sword nearly hitting his older brother. Sesshomaru grabbed Inuyasha by his throat; Rin ran to Sesshomaru and grabbed his arm.

"Stop it!" Rin screamed before Sesshomaru pushed her off of him. Inuyasha got away and heard Kagome holler as the snake flicked her with its poisoned tongue.

'Kill the girl!' something hissed in his head. He turned to her his eyes glowing red as she backed up frantically. He lifted his sword out of it sheath.

"Sesshomaru," she said softly as he glared at her with so much hatred it was crushing her heart, "Sesshomaru it's not you don't do this!"

"I almost had him! But you betrayed me! You're a pathetic good for nothing human! I can't stand the very sight of you… I will remove you!" He said swinging the sword down towards her.

Authors note: Sorry for the cliffy… it is 4: 55 AM go figure I seem to be able to think better lmao! But hopefully I am not working on this for nothing. So let me know what you think!


	6. 5: Dandelion

Chapter 5: Dandelion

Authors note: I won't make this long since you were left with a cliffhanger lol! But please if you like the story/or thinks it has potential REVIEW. That is the only way I can improve my writing is with your thoughts and opinions! Much loves. Oh… and there will be a little fluff in this okay a lot of fluff. If you're not a fluffy person and hate fluff I suggest another story. But if you can handle some fluff… then stick with me mates!

"Sesshomaru!!" she screamed as she rolled out of the way jumping up with her sword in her hand. She trembled as he gave a bone-chilling laugh. Kohaku looked in there direction, he was going to help but the snake threw him back. They were trying everything they could to kill it without making too much noise, yet nothing was working in the killing category. She backed up as he laughed at her again.

"You're going to stand up to your lord? And you wonder why I left you behind. To think I let myself possibly fall for a human, especially one so pathetic and feeble. Your not worth the swing of my sword, but that is the only way to get you out of my life for good!" he yelled swinging his sword as she blocked most of his attacks. She knew he was teasing with her for he could crush her with one swing. She ducked and ran underneath his arm, "enough toying around."

"EEK!" she screeched as his acid whip got the side of her arm. She grabbed her arm back up into a tree. He did it again this time it crossed her chest barely mostly as taunting. Rin looked at him before throwing her sword down, "I give up. Kill me. Kill me!"

"Weak," Sesshomaru tried to turn and leave anything but hurt her anymore then he could control. It was almost as hate had taken over his body. She stood there with teary eyes as she looked into his red eyes of hot hatred.

"Kill me… but let me see your eyes one last time," she said softly he hesitated and tried to step back and for a moment his eyes were normal. She smiled before his hand wrapped around her throat and slowly lifted her up the tree as his red eyes had gained control. Things got hard for her to breathe and she thought in horror, 'he's really going to kill me! I really am never going to see him again,' choking and sputtered she tried to free herself before grabbing the necklace that protected her from everything but him and ripped it off. There was a flash of white light that protruded everywhere knocking Sesshomaru from Rin. Rin tried to stand up as she felt it take over this time when Sesshomaru swung his sword at her she caught the blade in her hands. She no longer looked like her self; her skin was purple and her hair long and stringy. It was not what the normal youkai looked like which had everyone stumped. Why was she different? She punched Sesshomaru before grabbing him and throwing him. Rin ran at the serpent her sword raised and swinging it shattering the creature into a thousand pieces breaking the hatred cycle for them all. The hate effect was worst for the youkai and hanyou, it barely affected the humans. Rin looked at her hands and cried feeling her personality slip. She decided she wouldn't live like that and focused on pushing the poison out. 'I can't… I have to fight it. Give me the strength… Sesshomaru,' she reached for the necklace. Once in her hands it chased away the monster she became without it. The others looked at her as she breathed heavily and fell to the floor.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru said standing up as the other ran to the fallen girl. He quickly ran to her pushing everyone aside. He lifted the fragile girl into his arms. Inuyasha saw for the first time compassion in his older brother, "Rin… please oh please. Leave!"

"What!?" the others shouted but Sango looked to Kagome who sighed and nodded.

"Let us go… we must see if we have brought anything to cure her," Kagome said hurriedly as she looked back at the sad youkai under the moonlight holding the dying or dead girl.

"You're stronger then Rin I know you are… please say something. Anything just to hear you say anything," he said shaking her touching her face.

"Sesshomaru?" she asked in weak and fragile voice, "is… that you?"

"It is Rin. Stay with me you'll be fine," Sesshomaru said not sure how to handle the situation without getting emotional.

"I'm dying," Rin said in honesty.

"No… no you aren't," Sesshomaru said hastily, "please…"

"I am Sesshomaru. At least you won't have me…. dragging you down," Rin said in a hushed voice trying to open her eyes to see him one last time.

"You've known all along you wouldn't make it… didn't you?" Sesshomaru asked trying to keep her awake. She shook her head yes, "then why didn't you say anything? Was… that why you said to me what you said?"

"I said it because it needed to be said. But because I knew I wasn't going to make I knew it was then or never. You remembered me right? You will remember me right?" Rin asked softly closing her eyes.

"I told you a long time ago I do and will," Sesshomaru said moving a strand of black hair. She smiled softly.

"Tell me… once last time," she said softly, "tell me."

"Here by your side, or a million miles away nothing is ever going to change the way I feel. And the way that it is is the way that it was. When I said I do, I meant I would… until the end of all times. Remember you, be devoted to you, and to never forget you… never. That is what I meant when I said I do," he said holding her in his arms, "so please don't leave me now. Because I need you to be there with me when I find out what forever means. Please hang in there."

"Hmmm…" she said taking one last breath. He looked down at her but nothing came out. He shook her a little. Then shook her a lot.

"Rin? Rin…. Rin?!" he yelled shaking her harder feeling something he had never felt, "oh please I'll do anything just do not die. Rin… I need you! I've never needed anyone, just please come back I just need to know you live. Please… you're my dandelion. It's not your season… be strong for me. Rin… don't go, it's too long of a trip to go alone," he said a single tear falling from his face onto her head. It seemed that the tiny beat in her heart got jolted with excitement from his words bringing her back to life. She coughed looking around feeling tired and the poison getting ready to attack her heart again, "Rin?"

"I thought I was… uh," she said feeling the pain again. Sesshomaru quickly jumped up holding her as he transformed into his demon form. The girl breathed heavily as he leaped off covering an acre with each long stride. It was nearly two hours before they reached the village that they had been told to reach. He stopped taking deep painful breath spreading acid as he did. He collapsed right in front of the village turning into his normal form. Rin laid on top of him as he took deep shallow painful breaths as a villager ran across the handsome blonde haired man and the tiny human girl laying over him. The young girl bent down looking at them. She had her hair back in a ponytail before pulling out a whistle realizing that beneath the human girl… was a youkai. A loud shrill came from the whistle sending her villagers running, they looked down at the girl and the youkai laying there one in pain the other horrible poisoned.

"Take her to the village potion master," one man said before staring at the youkai, "place him in the confinement room."

"Yes master Gama," a boy said before carrying the girl as his buddies took the unconscious Sesshomaru. Rin laid in her room as a man stood over her cleaning her wound as she felt fire consume her and boil her human blood. She felt as the cure like cold water down sunburn tried ran through her body dissolving the poison. Rin thought of Sesshomaru and the fact that it was a single tear from his eye that revived her… what did he say to her that made her want to live? Why couldn't she remember? All she remembered was he was holding her tight, and that spoke louder then any words he could have said. She sat up fast wondering where he had been. Last thing she remembered was him turning into his demon form and running off with her. Had he brought her to the once place that could save her? Did he risk his own life… for hers?

"Sesshomaru!" she yelled as a boy walked into the room with the village leader as well the potion master. They looked at her with curiosity.

"Is that the demon we found you with?" an older man with receding gray hair said. He was short and hunchbacked.

"He's not just a demon," Rin said hastily, "where is he?"

"We have him locked up. He is still unconscious," an older but tall man said next to a young boy around fifteen.

--

Sesshomaru rolled over looking at the walls that surrounded him. He slowly stood up but fell back down in pain. Why was it that every time he transformed his arms shot unbearable pain. Was that the prince to be able to hold his sword? Or protect his friends and reclaim his land? He grabbed his arms before a picture of Rin floated in his head. He let out a peaceful sigh though the pain was still present.

'Just your image in my mind… is enough to put me at ease. Rin,' he thought to himself as he held his arms and growled, 'I hope she is okay. Don't let her die.'

--

"Take me to him please," Rin begged standing up feebly. They looked at each other as if trying to decide, "I demand you let me see him."

"I guess it won't do harm," the village leader said walking out, "follow me."

"Uh… right!" Rin said stumbling out after him. He led her to a tiny hut with a magical spell around it, "what is this?"

"It is for youkai, it keeps them contained until we put it down. No matter how much magic they use they will not be able to escape," the old man said opening the door revealing the blond lord on the floor. Rin looked at him in horror. It was her fault he was like that. She swallowed before walking in as he shut it behind her. Rin kneeled beside her lord as she looked at his face twitching in pain. She laid her hand on his hand before kissing him on his forehead. She sat there waiting for him to awake. He growled as he woke up and then looked into her eyes.

"Rin?" he said in a weak voice. She just told him to 'shhhh' before smiling at him with damp eyes. She tried to maintain her smile but slowly it slipped away He began to lose control of his thoughts.

'It's a gentle touch, but more then enough… she can stop this whole world from spinning too much. I guess it must be a natural thing I suppose… that I do believe; perhaps I've found my reason to be. She… has a way with me. No… she is a human. I will not settle for less then I deserve,' he said looking up into her eyes wishing they weren't full of sadness, tears, and love. How could she love him? He always knew as a human she would eventually go through a faze, 'I am not the same man since she's been around. There is more to this life that I certainly have found. She looks at me so differently… it's her that brings me peace in this cruel world. From the moment I saved her… she was what helped me be everything I could be,' he sighed trying to gain control of his wondering thoughts. She deserved to be with a man who would grow old with her. He was holding her back and she was holding him back, "Rin don't cry."

"What?" Rin asked shakily as she placed her lips together and bit them and then hiding her face with her hair, "I'm scared…"

"Come stop your crying Rin, it will be alright… just take my hand and hold it tight. I will protect you from all around. For one so small you are strong, with my arms I will keep you safe," he said looking at the ceiling, "I do not understand why they hate youkai so much to trap someone here."

"Because… you're kind is dangerous. Which is why I wondered as to why this human girl asked for you? Why do you talk to him as an equal?" the head of the village said with his broad tan arms crossed.

"Because he is not just another youkai. If it weren't for him I wouldn't be alive," she said standing up angrily.

"Rin," Sesshomaru said still staring at the ceiling. Rin looked to him before he spoke to her once more, "please sit."

"Yes lord Sesshomaru," Rin said behaving for once and sitting down.

"Your place is here with us not with some youkai. You are a human girl," the man said outraged at the fact she did what the demon asked her to, "he is a demon!"

"Shut up!" she screamed angrily before the man glared at her slamming the door. Rin was breathing fast along with her heart. Sesshomaru sighed realizing the man unfortunately was right, "Sesshomaru…"

"No Rin," Sesshomaru said quickly silencing her, "he is right."

"No he isn't!" Rin yelled angrily angry at him and the mans ignorance.

"Why can't you guys understand what I feel? I know we are different… but deep inside us lord Sesshomaru we are not that different at all. You'll be in my heart from this day on, now, and forever on," Rin said desperate for him to realize they belonged together.

"Rin," he said in his same tone, "but the world doesn't care about anything but our outside differences. I cannot bring upon you the pain and scorn from your people."

"They just don't trust what they can't explain! Don't listen to them because what do they know. We need each other! They will see in time I know! When destiny calls you, you must be strong. They will see in time, I know… they will see what I see. No matter what they say I will always be there with you! Always lord Sesshomaru," Rin said shakily on her hands and knees.

"Rin… you don't need me," Sesshomaru said swallowing not wanting to let these new emotions take him over.

"I do to!" she yelled angrily. He looked to her scaring her with the look on his face.

"Then I do not need you. I did not want to hurt you but it has to come to this. You have a false identity of my feelings towards you. You are just a companion, a friend, "Sesshomaru said trying to discourage her expression of her feelings. Rin looked at him angrily. Sesshomaru looked away wishing she would protest. But she did not, "you should go. I will find a way out."

"Then what about me?" Rin asked slumping down. Sesshomaru didn't look at her.

"We will discuss that later," Sesshomaru said as a younger boy came to claim Rin. Rin watched him as the boy led her out.

--

"Rin! Sesshomaru! Rin! Lord Sesshomaru… RIN!" Jaken yelled riding Ah-un through the foresdt followed by Inuyasha and his companions on Kirara. They followed the large paw prints from Sesshomaru for what felt like almost a full day. Kagome bit her lip as she squeezed close to Inuyasha. Inuyasha looked back at Kagome whose chocolate eyes were full of concern and worry, "RIN!!"

"I hope she is alright," Sango said randomly breaking the silence of the morning. Miroku just gave an acknowledging grunt.

"Keh! She's with Sesshomaru. He's always babied that human," Inuyasha said as he balanced himself so Kagome could comfortably stay put.

"Yes but Sesshomaru is weak after a transformation now," Jaken said worriedly, "My daughter could be already dead… RIN!!!"

"Jaken do not worry we will find them," Kagome said reassuringly, "like Inuyasha said I do not think Sesshomaru would let any harm come to her. I mean he left awfully fast to save her. I am surprised; I've always been surprised at how limitless his affections for that girl has been. I am glad to see that you have taken a liking to Rin."

"The past ten years I became very fond of her. She began to call me father and I fell into it. I am surprised Sesshomaru has not been angry with that. It is true he has shown an uncharacteristic like affection for Rin," Jaken murmured trying to take his mind off of his worries.

'Yes indeed… those words he spoke to her when I was ease dropping,' Kagome said deep in thought, 'wouldn't that just be romantic. Perhaps… but I wonder… could he ever really except a human as his partner?'

"Kagome?" Inuyasha's voice broke her concentration. Kagome looked at him, "you have that funny look you get on your face when your not paying attention."

"Funny?!" Kagome said glaring at the one man she ever loved. She was twenty-five and for ten years she had fallen more and more in love with him.

"Kagome…" Sango's voice said as they approached a village. Kagome glared at him before giving Sango her full attention. Kagome saw the large village and braced herself to stop. They all climbed off and saw where the huge paw prints ended and there was a print of a male body. They knew they were there.

--

'Why do I push her away?' Sesshomaru asked himself. He sighed heavily, 'I cannot become like my father. I will never be weak. I will never give my enemies the upper hand. She keeps dragging me down into situations like this. Yet it still seems to be my happiest moments. Do I want… to feel, no never! Not for a human. She was… why am I shedding every color to find truth beneath my skin? How can she consider us the same? Me like a human HA… but at least, she doesn't see me as other youkai. I will never let this come out. As of now I no longer think of her any other way as Rin a companion and subject.'

"Demon?" a voice said pulling Sesshomaru from his thoughts. Sesshomaru looked in the man's direction.

"Hm," Sesshomaru said before looking back. The man walked down the steps to where the powerful youkai lay uncaringly, "where is Rin?"

"She is safe," the leader of Gama village said crossing his arms and leaning against a wall, "she is what I have come to talk to you about."

"What about her?" Sesshomaru asked feeling something squeeze at his heart.

"I cannot seem to get her to agree and as much as we try to undo the brainwashing you've done to her, she will not agree to stop trailing with a demon. I will set you free as long as you leave her here, and never return here," the man said pausing before finishing, "she will marry one of my sons and be well looked after."

"I…" Sesshomaru closed his eyes and gritted his teeth trying to hold back a growl, "cannot force her to do what she doesn't want."

"But if you tell her to do something she will listen," the old man said looking at him seriously, "I will die here shortly and in order for my name to carry on as head villager my son must marry. But seeing as most women here are either too young or already been suited she fits perfectly."

'Perhaps she would be better off,' Sesshomaru said his eyes getting glazy, "I shall comply."

"Very well you should leave now," the old man said releasing the shield that held him prisoner. Sesshomaru walked out feeling fully restored with his strength. Rin had been sitting in a hut when she glanced out the window and saw Sesshomaru walking out of his confinement. She jumped up knocking the chair back before running out.

"LORD SESSHOMARU!" Rin yelled waving her arms as she ran faster. Sesshomaru looked back at her and then to the village headsmen, "why weren't you waiting for me?"

"Go back Rin," Sesshomaru said catching Rin off guard, "you belong here. This is where you belong with."

"Your wrong," Rin said frantically, "your wrong and you know it!"

"Rin go back that is an order," Sesshomaru said with his usual expressionless look. She looked up at him with teary brown eyes.

"Did I disappointment you? Or let you down? Should I be feeling guilty?" Rin asked frantic. Sesshomaru looked away afraid his eyes would give it away, "you can't break my spirit… but right now it's my dreams you take!"

"Rin go back!" he yelled not looking at her. He started walking back.

"You touched my heart, you touched my souls, and you changed my life and my goals. You have blinded my heart. I know you well Sesshomaru. You have been the one for me. As you move on Sesshomaru remember me, remember us…" she said walking behind him as he stood there breathing heavily. She placed her hand on his arm as he listened to her voice, "it maybe over but it won't stop that I am here for you… if you only cared."

"Rin… please," he said feeling weak, "you are foolish."

"I do not deny that Sesshomaru," she said placing her other hand on his arm as she looked up at him, "I do not deny I am a fool for you. I've seen you smile, I've watched you sleeping for a while, and I'd spend a lifetime with you. I know your fears and you know mine, we've had our doubts but now we are fine. I love you and I swear that is true! Even if you don't love me…"

"Rin," he said in a whisper as he placed his other hand on one of hers.

"Sesshomaru I cannot live without you," she said as he squeezed his eyes before throwing her hands off of him.

"Get away from me human!" he yelled catching her off guard.

"Sesshomaru," she said feeling tears tare down her voice. He didn't look at her, but stood there. Sesshomaru felt himself shake.

'If I stay near her… I will let it slip and bare my soul at her feet,' he said in his head before lifting his head, 'I cannot bring that shame to myself.'

"Rin!" Jaken yelled as Ah-un ran towards them with Jaken on its back. Kirara and the others followed. Rin closed her eyes as a tear fell from her long black eye lashes. Sesshomaru turned his head back to peek at her as her eyes were closed and the bottom of her chin shook.

'Oh Rin,' he said in his head before turning away and walking forward. The others watched as Sesshomaru began walking away. Kagome was first off and in front of Rin.

"Are you alright Rin?" Kagome asked full of concern. Rin shook her head yes. She knew she had to move on; she would go nowhere with Sesshomaru.

"Hey! Sesshomaru!" Inuyasha yelled walking past the girls towards his older. He did not look at Rin but knew she was crying, her tears over whelmed his nostrils. He made a face of disgust remembering how he hated when Kagome cried. Sesshomaru stopped before glancing over his shoulder to Inuyasha.

"What is it half brother?" Sesshomaru said as plain and coldly as normal.

"Where are you heading?" Inuyasha asked trying to be as friendly as Kagome threatened him to be. Sesshomaru looked back at Rin and then to the forest.

"To do what destiny as he chosen me for," Sesshomaru said seriously with an icy bite to it.

"Great, whatever. We need to talk. We have plans to make," Inuyasha said crossing his arms. Sesshomaru sighed before following Inuyasha back. The old woman's words kept running through his head.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" Jaken yelled once he let go of Rin's neck. Rin looked at Sesshomaru who did not look at her yet want to.

"Is that Ah-un?" Sesshomaru asked curiously. Jaken shook his head yes, "I thought you let him go?"

"I did and he came back to warn us that your land is being over run. He says it is time you return to reclaim it and set you people at ease," Jaken said bowing. Sesshomaru let out a deep breath before thinking about the homeland he left behind. It was probably now crawling with evil youkai planning to take over the empire Inuyasha and Sesshomaru's father had built.

"I will go back," Sesshomaru said making Jaken smile about his old homeland.

"You here that Rin! You finally get to see my homelands!" Jaken jumped up and down. Sesshomaru looked to Jaken.

"No she isn't going with us. Only you and I are going on this trip," Sesshomaru said seriously.

"Sesshomaru I beg of you please!" Rin said swallowing frantically, "do not leave me behind! I swear I will not say a thing about what happen! I swear anything you ask of me! Do not abandon me!"

"Rin silence," Sesshomaru said softly, "can I talk to her alone for a moment?"

"Yes lord Sesshomaru," Jaken said bowing as the others walked out of ears reach.

"Lord Sesshomaru I swear to you I will be good. I will do anything you ask of me," Rin said trying to keep her cool.

"Rin," Sesshomaru said trying to find away to put it, "I thought about it a lot. I must go to my homeland alone first so I can make sure it is safe enough to bring you there. I want you to stay with Kagome so you get a taste of what it is like to be with humans. It may only be a week, a month, or perhaps a year. You need to know that for sure serving me is what you want. It is different with Jaken and the others, you I am giving a choice."

"Lord Sesshomaru," she said looking up at his eyes. There was that kindness she had missed, "I've lived with humans for ten years and felt all the things that I am supposed to. But I still want to be by your… behind you."

"Rin," he said looking at her seriously, "how do you know that is what you want? How can I be sure I would not be making a mistake by letting you make a mistake? You know that with me you cannot have a normal life, for where I go there will be no humans like you. If you truly wish to follow me… then how far are you willing to follow? How do I know?"

"Lord Sesshomaru, when you first met me I was a fairy princess in my mind, I caught frogs and called them prince and made myself a queen. Before you knew me I traveled around the world, I slipped into castle and fell in love because I was taught to dream. I believe in fairy tales, and dreamer's dreams. And I believe in miracles, and anything I can to get by… and I believe in fireflies. Before I grew up I saw you on a cloud, I could bless myself in your name. Before I grew up I heard you whisper so loud, life is hard and so is love child. I believed in it all and I still believe in some, but mostly I believe in you lord Sesshomaru. I believe you're the world, that you can do anything… I had a human life and all it brought me was misery. Before you knew me lord Sesshomaru… I was just another human," Rin said seeing a grown up look in her eyes he had never seen. He tried to hold back a smile before pulling out a dandelion that he had picked before and stuck in his pocket. He handed it to her, "Lord Sesshomaru?"

"It reminded me of you Rin. I will be back for you and this dandelion is my promise. I will come back for you and the others soon. But know this," he said as she took the dandelion from his hand and looked at it, "If when I come back… you want a normal human life I will not stop you."

"Alright," she said smiling at him, "you will come back right?"

"I told you I would Rin," he said irritation spreading over his face.

"Sorry milord… just double checking," she said getting a nervous look, "thank you Sesshomaru."

"Rin," he said bowing before turning to walk off. Rin placed the golden flower between her ear and her head. Rin watched as Jaken, Ah-un, and Sesshomaru disappeared. Rin waved her hand hard smiling making sure they saw her.

Authors note: I hope you liked it. Next chapter they will go to Kagome's time! What will happen? Will Sesshomaru miss Rin and coming running back? Will Rin and Kohaku get close? Will the group run into danger? Will Sesshomaru meet another youkai? Ohhh the plans I have to come for this. The beginning was just Childs play compared to what is going to happen. So stay along for the ride!

THANK YOU ARIZONABAY FOR REVIEWING AND CLEARLY READING IT!


	7. 6: I gotta know

Chapter 6: I gotta know

Authors note: Well I figured I would get started on this. Hopefully there aren't too many problems with grammar. I don't have time to reread all of the chapters I usually skim since I have so much to do these days plus think things up for this! And the last "authors note" was kind of a… giving how things might be. But she is going to Kagome's time! And I do not think I will have Kohaku and Rin together… well maybe you never know how the mood may strike with this story. But thank you once again Arizonabay I can always depend on you to review! What a fantabulous reader I have! And for those who happen to read this far I recommend you check out her story! Hopefully she will get a new chapter up soon! I want to keep up with her; she's got some great ideas too!

Sesshomaru, Ah-un, and Jaken trailed up a grassy hill finally close to his homelands. It had been nearly a week worth of traveling and so much was running through the great lord's mind. Yet he was surprised that the most frequent thought was of a girl. A human girl! He wondered what her choice would be? Would it be an adventurous husband and family less with him choice? Or would she choose to explore what it felt like to live with a human man, to be married to one of her own, and to have human babies. The thought of it made his jaw line tense as he gritted his teeth. He wanted her there with him but didn't want to let him disgrace himself with a foolish idea. But life without her was just so boring; it was meaningless, and colorless. He let out a sigh as he looked forward wanting to run back.

"Lord Sesshomaru," Jaken said not easily fooled as much as Sesshomaru and Rin believed different.

"What is it Jaken," Sesshomaru said in his usual tone. Jaken never took it to offense, he understood who is lord was.

"Everybody looks for love, some wait their whole life and it never comes around," Jaken said using his staff to keep him balanced.

"What are you mumbling about?" Sesshomaru said looking down at Jaken curious but outraged.

"What I am saying is don't hold back anymore Lord Sesshomaru, just let go of all you've ever known," Jaken said as Sesshomaru looked shocked at Jaken's words.

"I'll deal with you later Jaken. There is youkai near by," Sesshomaru said making Jaken whimper before Sesshomaru worriedly yet calmly walked in the direction of the youkai scent.

--

Rin gazed at the stars as she played with a dead dandelion. She let out a deep sigh before placing the dandelion on her ear. She crossed her arms underneath her womanly chest. She was spooked by the wrestling of leaves and brush, she sat up propping herself on her arms. A boy walked out and she knew it was Kohaku.

"I could have been a youkai," Kohaku said smiling as he stood above the brown-eyed growing young woman, "you'd be dead if it were a youkai."

"Then you underestimate me Kohaku brother of Sango," Rin said remembering when he had taken her… when he was under the influence of Naraku, "I am not as helpless as I was when I first met you."

"About that I am sorry," Kohaku said with an apologetic look on his face. She sighed before giving him a half smile.

"Your forgiven for the mistakes of our past," Rin said looking up with childlike eyes. He rocked back and forth on his feet before she rolled her eyes, "you can sit if you like."

"How kind of you to offer," he said sitting down in the crisp grass, "so what are you doing out here?"

"Asking the stars for guidance as to what I am suppose to do," Rin said smiling at him with a warmhearted smiling. She finally felt like she didn't have to please anyone. She didin't have anyone to impress.

"Don't… you ever worry the stars might lie to you?" Kohaku asked as he looked up at the twinkling skies, "they sit so far away twinkling as if they are better then the next. Like life, humans, youkai, and hanyou's. Rin looked at him with shock as she swallowed.

"Why would you doubt the stars?" Rin asked curious as she hugged her knees.

"It was the stars that lied to me. For years I asked for the stars to break me from Naraku's curse, and they blinked in a different direction leaving me alone," he said going silent leaving Rin speechless, "I know I've already apologized to you Rin… and I know Sesshomaru still has a grudge against me for that I did. But I am truly sorry, if I had control I would have never done that."

"I know Kohaku," Rin said looking at the young man in front of her staring at the stars with eyes that told a tale long and sad.

"So forgive me if I no longer believe in the stars," he said looking away, "I've lost faith in them."

"Kohaku…" she said her eyes wide as she looked at the boy who had grown up so much.

"Which is why I have talked to my sister about going to stay in Kagome's time for awhile. They have not fully put the Shikon no Tama back together. I am going to attend what Kagome calls school there. Then we are going to travel to other countries. Miroku suggested that you go too, just until Sesshomaru comes back… to see whether with him is where you truly want to be. Leave behind this sad place," Kohaku said looking down. Rin wanted to protest in anger but the boy seemed so lost. Rin was a curious child and the more she thought about the more interesting it sounded. She confessed her love to Sesshomaru and he rejected her. What was left there for her? He clearly didn't care whether or not she was around.

"I will go…" Rin said in surprise that she had agreed to it, "… but only until Sesshomaru comes back."

"We leave tomorrow," Kohaku said still empty. Rin looked at the boy as he laid back into the grass.

"Right," Rin said looking down at the boy whose hands was underneath his head as he gazed at the treetops.

"I never thought that the feel of grass could be such bliss," Kohaku said before his eyes wondered over to Rin who sat looking at the cloudless sky, 'perhaps… it's the company,' he said as Rin looked over at him and smiled.

"What about nature isn't bliss?" she asked as her mind drifted to Sesshomaru and how amazing his smile was… the few times she got one out of him.

"I don't know," he said smiling at her, "nothing."

"Hm," she murmured her agreement while smiling before laying back. He looked up at the sky, as they lay there quiet for a while.

--

"Sooryuha!" Sesshomaru yelled sending his attack towards the lowly youkai as they vanished with a cry. Jaken jumped up and down with happiness. Sesshomaru walked past the battlefield as he furthered over the hill to his castle. Jaken rode Ah-un to keep up with Sesshomaru as they took over the lands that rightfully belonged to Sesshomaru. Jaken waited for a beating for the past two days after his comment.

"When are we going back for Rin?" Jaken asked missing his child, "I miss her."

'So do I,' Sesshomaru thought before trying to push his thoughts aside, "when our jobs is done. Let her have her space."

"Yes Lord Sesshomaru," Jaken said with a sadness Sesshomaru had never heard from his servant.

"You love that girl don't you?" Sesshomaru asked not looking back at Jaken.

"Whole heartedly," Jaken said getting up the courage, "and don't you?"

"How can you love a human? It is despicable Jaken. Youkai's are to good to love humans," Sesshomaru said making up every excuse.

"I guess that makes me weak," Jaken said catching Sesshomaru off guard, "but I am still a youkai by right. And because I love her I will not deny it, because I love her… I am stronger."

"Uh," Sesshomaru said stopping making Ah-un automatically stop nearly throwing Jaken off. Sesshomaru stood there a moment before walking forward not speaking for the rest of the day. 'How can he love her and not even attempt to deny it. I gotta know! Rin… told me she loved me. Me… a youkai. She still believes that we are the same. But she will grow out of this. I gotta know… how it feels to be able to admit love for a human out loud. Do… do I love her? No… I barely know who she is now. She is so stubborn and unruly now, yet she is still the same sweet girl who wants to help everyone before herself.'

"We are here my lord," Jaken said as they reached the castle. It was large and looked over all of his land. Sesshomaru walked in casually as his servant's gawked at their master being back.

"Where is Hachia?" Sesshomaru asked before one of his servants ran off to get Hachia. It was a moment before Hachia walked down wearing fancy clothing.

"Sesshomaru!" she said in shock, "I had not… been expecting you."

"Clearly," he said to the women he had been betrothed to. At one point he thought he might have had a chance at loving the youkai women, but he had found her sneaking around with a servant who swiftly met his doom. He wondered if Rin was that kind of girl, 'why does every thing turn my thoughts to her! Why cannot I not tear her from my memory!'

"Sesshomaru…" she said walking down the stairs before he interrupted. He looked passed the blonde beauties fake smile to see him.

"You have been released to your duties of taking control of my castle and people," Sesshomaru said still standing in the doorway.

"But…" she stopped when she that look in her eye that terrified her, "yes lord Sesshomaru."

"Good get my chambers ready. I've had a tiring journey, we will talk business and plans later," he said walking to the room where he kept his armor. He stripped his lightweight armor onto a rack before placing on his usual white outfit. When he made it to his room he closed the door and locked it. He walked to the balcony that looked over his land and let out a sigh, 'what will I do about a mate? I was promised to Hachia… unless I found someone else I found worthy. But I do not desire to find anyone… else. I don't want another pretty face, or just anyone to hold. If I do love I don't want it to go to waste. I want… her. She is something special; I want to be what she always needed. She is the only one who has seen the heart in me. She is the one I want to chase and hold… but she is a human. A human… how disgusting. She has a… soul, a beautiful soul that I am told I do not posses. I fear making her cry. How much longer can I go on like this… wondering? Am I crazy for wanting her? Desiring her? Craving her? I just want to know… if she truly feels it too. She has filthy blood… but it isn't blood that I am in love with,' Sesshomaru let out a heavy sigh before dropping his head so his long blonde hair fell in front of his face reminding him of the time she touched him pushing it out of his face so she could see him. 'I remember you,' she said. His name she let escape her lips. She hadn't forgotten him… she dreamt of him.

Sesshomaru walked from the balcony to where his large round bed sat next to the wall. He plopped onto it closing his eyes trying to push her image from his head. As he lay awake in his bed a voice inside his head softly says, 'why don't you go to her? Why don't you kiss her? Why don't you tell her… let her see the feelings you hide. She'll never know if you never show the way you feel inside Sesshomaru?' he squeezed his eyes tighter as he tried to make her image and that voice go away. But it just kept repeating it, 'I'm so afraid to make a move. Just a touch could lead me across the line. Because every time she is near I want to never let her go and confess to her what my heart feels, though I've willed it demanded it and begged it to stop. I wonder thought if I told her. What would she say? I wonder if she would just turn away? Or would she promise me she's here to stay. It hurts me to wait… but I cannot love a human I cannot. I cannot… I cannot… I cannot love her.'

--

"Are you ready Rin?" Kagome asked as she handed Rin a shard. Rin looked at the necklace that was made out of it. Kagome had put it all together except for six shards, which she made into necklaces so that Kirara, Sango, Kohaku, Inuyasha, Miroku, and Shippo could dip between eras. Rin had used Sango's necklace as the others were going to stay behind and look for clues as to who and what was threatening the world. Only Rin, Kohaku, and Kagome were going back into time.

"I… how will Sesshomaru know where I am at?" Rin asked worriedly as she gripped the necklace he had given her.

"Inuyasha will you find Sesshomaru's castle and tell him where she is going," Kagome said looking to Inuyasha who crossed his arms and rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Keh… whatever," Inuyasha said looking away. Miroku shook his head before looking at Kagome.

"We will find Sesshomaru for you," Miroku said climbing onto Kirara behind his wife Sango. Kagome, Rin, and Kohaku waved as the others flew off to find Sesshomaru. Rin closed her eyes as she jumped down the well. She landed with a thud as Kagome helped her up and moved out of the way for Kohaku. He caught himself and looked around in amazement. They walked out of the well into the modern era. Rin gasped placing her hand to her mouth in amazement. Kagome smiled before showing them to her house.

"Mama!" Kagome yelled as her younger brother sat playing video games with his cat sitting in his lap. Kagome's mom was in the room cooking when the three stepped into the heavily scented kitchen.

"Ah Kagome your home!" her mother said rushing to hug her daughter, "you were gone much longer then usual."

"I am sorry to have worried you mama," Kagome said as he mother let go of the death grip, "oh these are my friends Rin and Kohaku."

"Pleasure to meet you," Kagome's mother said shaking their hands. Rin blushed shyly as she shook Kagome's mothers hands, "how long do they plan to stay?"

"Kohaku plans on attending school here. He is from the feudal era they both are. I thought it would be nice to bring a little knowledge to that age," Kagome said smiling, "Rin will be attending for a little awhile probably a month."

"I will call your school and make some arrangements. Where should I say they came from? Korea? Thailand?" her mother said lifting the phone.

"Get creative," Kagome said smiling at her mother before walking passed her brother and scuffling his hair. Rin screamed and jumped behind Kohaku pointing at the TV.

"I thought there was no youkai here! Kagome!" Rin yelled catching the whole house off guard. They all laughed before returning to there former positions. Rin's face dropped before she let go of Kohaku's shoulders.

"Kagome you have a lot of explaining to do," Souta her brother said as he played his playstation. Kagome showed them to their rooms. Kohaku was going to share with Souta since they were about the same age. Rin would sleep in the same room as Kagome. They all unpacked as Kagome began to explain the two about the things in her time. She then gave them a small tour. She then took them shopping so they could look there part. There was so much there that Rin actually forgot her worries for a few lonely and exciting moments. When they went back Rin climbed into her sleeping bag and sighed.

"Rin? Kagome asked through the darkness.

"Yes Kagome," Rin said as a tear rolled down her cheek. Kagome swallowed a moment.

"Why do you still tag around with Sesshomaru?" Kagome asked as nicely as possible, "why since you know what a life without him is life… why when he is still so cold?"

"Because though others may see him as a sour green apple, I see him as a golden delicious… starts out bitter but grows to be sweet," Rin said smiling before letting out a sigh, "because those ten years I had forgotten who Sesshomaru was, but I saw him in my dreams."

"You love him don't you?" Kagome asked snuggling into her pillow, "like I love Inuyasha after twelve or fifteen years now."

"Whether or not Sesshomaru chooses to see it him and I are one. As we go through life there is so much we don't understand, and the only thing we know is things don't go as we plan. But everyday I have never turned away, even when he made my dreams come undone. I stood by his side full of hope and full of pride. Him and I are one," Rin said trying to convince her, "as a child I knew I'd be with him forever. I do love him, though I know not how it happened."

'Oh Rin… I do not believe he would ever except a human,' Kagome thought before swallowing, "perhaps you should you know. Not give your hopes… do not give up."

"What about you and Inuyasha?" Rin asked looking to her, "over ten years something must have happened."

"Yes… he blurted out I was going to have his child," she smiled before hearing Rin beg her to tell the story…

--Flashback--

"Kagome!" Inuyasha yelled as Kagome walked to the well leading back to her time, "KAGOME!"

"We aren't speaking!" Kagome yelled angrily as she turned to look at him, "I am tired of hearing you give me excuses of why you have to find Kikyo. If you want to be with her then be with her! But I gotta know why!"

"Kagome?" he asked as she stood in front of him with her hands on her hips, "keh!"

"Fine! I am going back and I never ever EVER want to see your face again Inuyasha!" Kagome yelled angrily.

"Fine!" Inuyasha yelled turning crossing his arms and turning. He peaked over his shoulder and watching Kagome climbing over, "HEY KAGOME!"

"Go away Inuyasha… you know what I don't feel like yet. I'm going to see Kouga," Kagome said walking past him casually with her nose in the air. Inuyasha had a dumb founded look on his face before clenching his fist and stomping on the ground.

"Kagome!" he yelled running to her as Miroku and Sango watched with eyes wide and Shippo munched on some chips Kagome had given him.

"Go away Inuyash," Kagome said standing with her arms crossed, "if you want to find Kikyo go ahead I am not stopping you."

"Yes you are!" Inuyasha yelled angrily, "Why are you leaving!"

"Because I am not needed here anymore Inuyasha! Naraku is gone! The shards have been found! You don't need me around anymore!" Kagome yelled with teary eyes, "I know you still love Kikyo your always thinking about her when I am around. I look like her and as long as I am around your being haunted."

"Kagome you're crying? Is that how you feel? That you haunt me?" Inuyasha broke out in a fit of laughter that made Miroku shake his head and Shippo pull at his hair, as Sango got teary eyed.

"It's not funny! SIT!" Kagome screeched running off as Inuyasha was pulled to the ground painfully. This time he would not let Kagome get away so he jumped up and raced after her. Kagome's hands covered her eyes as she thought about the one she loved loving his ex who looked like her.

"Kagome!" Inuyasha yelled angrily. Kagome stopped, as Inuyasha got closer smelling her tears.

"Inuyasha leave me alone. I am going where "I" am loved, not my image," she said making him stop and get a look of confusion and then jealousy as she ran off in the direction of Kouga's clan.

"Damn it woman no! Your having MY pups not his!" he yelled before realizing what he said. Kagome stopped with a look on her face that clearly looked of shock. Miroku busted up laughing before Sango hit him in the head, which made him, stop laughing.

"He must have learned that from you," Sango said in a sour tone. Miroku just looked up at her with smile.

"I only love you dear," he said making Sango smile and Shippo roll his eyes.

"Why… did you say that?" Kagome asked turning to look at that. Inuyasha rolled his eyes before walking towards her.

"Just thinking of that dumb mutt putting his hands on you outrages me," he said with his arms crossed. Kagome looked up at him with a blank face. Inuyasha sighed before grabbing her arms and looking into her eyes, "I do not think of Kikyo when I look at or am around you. When I am around her I think of you… hell I think of you everywhere. It's rather annoying."

"Annoying!" but before Kagome could finish he rolled his eyes and pulled her into a kiss that spoke his words better then he ever could.

-End of flashback-

"Aww that is so sweet," Rin said with longing eyes. Kagome smiled and shook her head yes.

"We will be getting married soon. Once we defeat this son of Naraku then him and I will be married out here," Kagome said before thiking of Rin and Sesshomaru. Then she remembered something, "Rin? Do you remember anything Sesshomaru said to you the night he nearly killed you by accident?"

"All I remember was it was a tear from his eyes the revived my heart," Rin said looking through the dark and Kagome, "why?"

"Because Rin I must be honest," Kagome said thinking of Inuyasha, "Inuyasha would have never admitted his feelings for me with words I could here. I don't know if Sesshomaru will ever fully accept you BUT I think that you are in his heart. That night you laid there nearly dead in his arms he let a little of those feelings show. He said 'Please don't leave me now. Because I need you to be there with me when I find out what forever means. Please hang in there. Rin? Rin…. Rin! Oh please I'll do anything just do not die. Rin… I need you! I've never needed anyone, just please come back I just need to know you live. Please… you're my dandelion. It's not your season… be strong for me. Rin… don't go, it's too long of a trip to go alone Rin?' I do not know if he said it to bring you back to life. But for the first time that night I saw he had a heart, he had a soul… and you were apart of it.

--

"Sesshomaru?" Jaken asked as he watched his lord stab at his food but not take a bite, "lord Sesshomaru?"

"Hm?" he asked lifting his head and seeing Jaken smile.

"We are leaving to get her soon aren't we?" Jaken said knowing that his master did have feelings for that dark haired human. Sesshomaru swallowed a lump in his throat before nodding, "good because I miss her. It's been nearly three weeks since I last saw her eternally childlike eyes."

"I know," Sesshomaru said smiling as he stood up and walked out. For ten years he lived without her but not he couldn't even go three weeks what was wrong with him. He paced in his room frantically. He sat on his bed and placed his hands on his head so his hair could fall forward, "I've never been the kind to let my feelings show. Being strong means never losing my self-control. But I can't handle it anymore… to hell with my pride; tonight I will go and bring her back. I cannot have her but I will not be without her!"

Authors note: Well I hope you enjoyed it. Hmmm I wonder what will happen… yiksa! Thanks for reading!


	8. 7: Appearance and mistake worth making

Chapter 7: The first appearance and the mistake worth making

Authors note: Well I got no reviews on my last chapter which makes me sad but that is all right I will live!

Rin sat in the seat gnawing on the wooden pencil. So far she had liked school, but just couldn't fit in. Kohaku sat next to her paying close attention to every detail the teacher was saying. Kagome had taught them all she remembered up until ninth grade. Rin still didn't quite get it, but Kohaku always explained it to her. In the past two weeks at school her and Kohaku had grown rather close. He made many friends, where she wasn't interested in anyone except for Sesshomaru.

"Rin?" Kohaku asked when the bell rang spooking Rin. She still wasn't use to that either. She looked to a smiling Kohaku.

"Yes Kohaku?" Rin asked as she stood up hugging her books to her chest. Kohaku smiled at her bigger making her frown, "what Kohaku!"

"You look beautiful today," he said making her shrink and blush.

"Ehhe," she said her eyes open wide, "Kohaku…"

"Time for class Rin no time let's hurry," Kohaku said running. Rin sighed before running after her. She had grown very fond of Kohaku in the past two and a half weeks in Kagome's time, but Sesshomaru was the only one she could think about.

'Why can't I like Kohaku? Normally I would have already been in love with him, he is a very handsome boy… Sesshomaru doesn't even want me around. He's only coming back because of Jaken.'

"Rin?" the teacher asked repeatedly as she daydreamed. Rin sat up and looked at the teacher, "pay attention Rin."

"Yes mam," Rin said looking to Kohaku nervously. Kohaku smiled at her making her shrink into her chair. He had been one of her closest friends she had ever had in awhile… but still sometimes he gave it away a little too much.

'I wonder if I should tell her I want to marry her!' Kohaku thought in his head, 'she is so exhilarating! Yet she has this barrier up that she doesn't want to let me past.'

'He's staring at me again,' Rin said letting her eyes wonder to the window, 'maybe… I should give it a try?'

'I will ask her to marry me! I will do everything to make you happy Rin!' he said sitting up drastically. When school was over they put their stuff away and headed back to Kagome's home. Kagome was busy making wedding plans for she couldn't wait. Kohaku looked around for a flower and found a yellow one on the ground. He ran by her side holding the flower behind him.

"Rin?" he asked as she stopped to look at him with that angel like face, "I want you to marry me!"

"Kohaku!" she yelled in shock as he took both her hands in his and got onto his knees.

"It is true I will never let you down, I will be a good husband and give you anything you ask just marry me!" he yelled looking up at her.

"Eh?" was all she could mutter before she bit her lip, "Kohaku I love another."

"Sesshomaru?" he asked looking down. She nodded yes, "well he left you Rin I would never! Please give me a chance and if it doesn't work then I swear to you, you can walk away!"

"Kohaku… I like you but not enough to marry you," she said sadly as she looked at him.

"Then be my girl even if just for a week," Kohaku said standing up and looking down at her.

"What will that do for you?" Rin asked curiously. He let out a sigh.

"Even if I can only have you for a week then I will be so very happy!" Kohaku said with enthusiasm.

"For a week then," Rin said giving in. But when he handed her a yellow flower… when he handed her a dandelion she busted out in tears. Kohaku looked at her in shock.

"Uh… Rin?" he asked trying to hand her the flower, "why are you crying?"

"That is the flower Sesshomaru gave me… at least the same kind," she said crying into her hands. Kohaku pulled her into a hug. He tossed the flower down and stomped on it before taking her hand and walking home. Kagome watched the two hand in hand walk in. It felt nice to finally know what it felt like to have a boyfriend.

"Uh Rin? Kohaku?" Kagome asked pointing a pencil in there direction suggesting the hand holding, "explain."

"She's my woman!" Kohaku said with excitement. Kagome looked to Rin with suspicious.

"For a week!" she yelled smacking him in the head, "that is it Kagome I swear."

'Maybe that would be better for her… to love a human,' Kagome thought chewing on the end of her pencil, "well I just talked to Shippo. He said that they didn't find Sesshomaru yet. He is not at his castle, Jaken said that he doesn't know where he took off but wherever he went he went in a hurry."

'Oh Sesshomaru don't do anything hasty or get hurt,' Rin thought as she looked at the ground. Kagome smiled knowing that look VERY well.

--

"Rin!" Sesshomaru yelled jumping from rock to rock through the lands. He had looked for a week and found no trace of any of them.

"Sesshomaru!" Jaken's normal voice came making Sesshomaru stop slamming into the ground as he landed.

"Jaken!" Sesshomaru yelled as Kirara landed letting the group down, "Rin! Where is she?"

"Rin is back in Kagome's time until you return," Sango said handing him her necklace, "you know where the well is. She'll be waiting for you. We shall wait for you to bring her back."

"What? I don't want her!" he said trying to hand back the necklace hoping they wouldn't take it back.

"Sesshomaru please bring her back!" Jaken said going along with his denial.

"Fine," Sesshomaru said leaping off on a hurry to find the well.

"He left awfully fast," Shippo laughed.

"Yeah and didn't even have to be asked twice," Miroku joked, "kind of like a hanyou we know!"

"Shut up monk," Inuyasha said clogging Miroku in the head.

"I hope she hasn't changed her mind. Though I cannot accept her the way I want to… I don't know if I can fight this fight without her," Sesshomaru said flying through the air until he finally found the well. He leaped inside landing with a thud. He walked out afraid of the world around him. Everything was different; nothing looked the same as he walked around, "RIN!"

"Who are you?" and old man asked before yelling, "KAGOME YOUKAI!"

"What grandpa!" Kagome yelled running out with her bow and arrows in hand. Kagome stopped seeing Sesshomaru, "grandfather it is alright. Sesshomaru what are you doing here?"

"Where is Rin? I've come to take her home she doesn't belong here," Sesshomaru said walking past her, "RIN!"

"She is at school with Kohaku Sesshomaru. But we need to talk," Sesshomaru said pulling him inside her home so that no one would see the curious looking human. Sesshomaru followed Kagome casually as she took him into the living room.

"What is school and where is it?" Sesshomaru said plain and coolly. Kagome scratched her head before explaining.

"I think Rin has a chance here…" she began before looking up at the cold expression on his face. But his eyes… those same as… Inuyasha's eyes. The look of… love? The look of a mistake ready to be made, but worth making, "but she won't be happy."

"Hmmm," Sesshomaru said not expecting her to end with that, "then what do I do. Because Jaken misses her."

"Sesshomaru you need not play coy with me," Kagome said looking at him seriously. Sesshomaru looked at her plainly.

"I have no feelings for her she is a human," he said crossing his arms and looking away. Kagome laughed before looking out the window to see Kohaku and Rin walking back together.

"I never mentioned feelings, you did yourself. You and Inuyasha are more alike then either of you would like to see," she said making Sesshomaru about to yell at her until he saw Rin walk into the house. For a moment the world stop moving, for a moment he stopped breathing, for a moment he forgot where he was.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru said as she walked up to him. Rin's eyes went wide before she ran up to him stopping herself from hugging him. Kagome took an angry Kohaku out of the room.

"Sesshomaru?" Rin said as he walked the rest of the way up to her. She was shocked when he pulled her into a hug. A look of shock spread across her face before she slowly wrapped her arms around him.

"It feels like forever since I've seen you," he said his eyes open and an expression of sadness and relief on his face, "and forever feels like home sitting all alone inside my head."

"Sess… Sesshomaru?" she asked before closing her eyes and squeezing him, "I began to think you'd never return."

"So did I," he admitted not wanting to let go until Kohaku escaped Kagome and ran in. Rin and Sesshomaru let go as Kohaku walked dangerously towards Sesshomaru and Rin.

"Stay away from my woman!" Kohaku yelled pulling Rin to her side as Sesshomaru brought out his side.

"Kohaku! Sesshomaru!" She yelled pushing Kohaku off of her and placing a hand on Sesshomaru's strong broad chest. Sesshomaru looked down to her.

"Is this true Rin? Do you choose him?" he asked looking down at her with a normal face that said more then he thought he did. Kagome watched with both of her hands on her mouth.

"I never knew I had to choose anyone," Rin said looking at him. Sesshomaru nodded his head and placed his sword back in its sheath, "your right you don't have to."

"Sesshomaru… where are you going?" Rin asked confused as to what was going on. He stopped and stood still as he listened to that sweet voice.

"Back to where I belong. Clearly," he said walking forward but slowly waiting for Rin to protest. He waited a moment before she finally blurted out.

"Take me with you!" she screamed out before grabbing some of his cloth, "do not leave me again I beg of you. I'd rather be near you then live without you!"

"Are you sure of this Rin? You have a chance at a normal life, what I have always wanted for you," Sesshomaru said as he looked back at the giant chocolate eyes staring at him with longing, 'oh please do not let her want to be here with him.'

"It is what I want Sesshomaru," Rin said looking up at him pleadingly, "you promised remember?"

"I did," he agreed before walking forward. Rin stood there looking at him with a dumbfound look on her face, "are you coming Rin?"

"Yes right! Wait for me!" Rin said before turning to Kohaku and Kagome, "won't you come back with us?"

"I will!" Kohaku yelled taking her hand and kissing it, "anywhere you are I will follow!"

"I guess it is time I go back for Inuyasha," Kagome smiled grabbing some food and packing it. Rin marched behind him through the well followed by the others. Inuyasha and the rest of the gang sat waiting as they all popped up.

"RIN!" Jaken yelled running to her and leaping into her long womanly arms. She spun her father around happy to see him.

"Father Jaken!" she giggled as they fell over. Sesshomaru could help but smile. Inuyasha pulled Kagome into a relieved embrace. The others welcomed them all as Sesshomaru sat watching his younger half brother with his human girl.

'Why can't I be like that with Rin?' he asked himself before shaking the thought from his mind. He sighed as he remembered something Rin had said, 'I don't think about black in terms of gray, or revoliations in the light of days, I don't think of cold in the terms of ice. Second chances happen times, I think of me in terms of you, I think of you in terms of us, I think of us in terms of the same,' the thought made him sigh, 'do you really believe that Rin? Could we ever really go through this life together feeling the way we do? I know you claim you love me, and I know my heart does not want to deny you… but is it what you truly want? I look at you and I don't know how much time has passed; yet it feels like forever. How do you feel is the question? But I forget you don't expect an easy answer from me. You are a smart girl this I know. Do you remember what you stare at is me when your looking at me?'

"Sesshomaru?" Rin asked walking towards him, as he watched her not realizing he was staring. He snapped out of it and then looked away, "Lord Sesshomaru?"

"What is it Rin?" he asked not wanting to talk to anyone. Rin touched his arm and smiled at him. He couldn't deny his eyes the sight of her.

"Thank you… for coming and getting me," she said smiling at him. He nodded his head before turning so her hand slipped from his muscular arm. He sighed loud enough for her to hear.

'Why does he deny me? That stubborn idiot! When he hugged me… I know he is hiding something from me, and worst himself,' she though to herself as she looked at it.

They finally got on the road after eating. Everyone talked about Rin and Kohaku's two weeks at school and all they learned. Rin couldn't contain herself from all she had seen, it poured out with such excitement she spooked Ah-un and he nearly bolted almost knocking her and Jaken off. The others laughed as Rin caught Jaken who was plunging to the ground. Rin pulled him up as they heard the screams of a village near by and smelt the smell of fire. Kirara took off instinctively leaving behind Rin, Jaken, Sesshomaru, and Ah-un.

"Shouldn't we follow?" Rin asked pulling out her sword. Sesshomaru looked to her as plainly as ever.

"We should not fight a battle that is not our own," Sesshomaru said looking to the distance when really what worried him was the chance of losing Rin. She was already starting to drag him down.

"They need help Sesshomru!" Rin yelled smacking her mouth, "I mean milord."

"Stay here I will be back," Sesshomaru said running quickly in the direction. Rin yelled at him loudly.

"HEY!!!!" she yelled before slumping back into her seat, "I am not a child!"

"Calmly Rin, he does what he feels is best for you. You may not see it but he tries his hardest for you," Jaken said patting her, "besides this gives us a chance to talk my child."

"What do you want to talk about papa?" Rin asked placing her sword away. Jaken patted her back before thinking.

"Lord Sesshomaru and you," Jaken said making her perk up and look at him, "do not play stupid child. I see the way you look at him when you're with him, and I see the way he looks when he's not with you."

"Nothing is between us father," Rin said sitting back into her seat more, "he makes it so hard to love him. Why does he make it hard to love him? Why can't he even start to try? Because now I feel a bridge is burning, and all the smoke is in my eyes."

"Rin he is a youkai," Jaken said looking at her, "as much as he makes it hard to be loved. He loves you, but he will never let you in."

"I've been changing though, I've been wondering what do with this. Here I am feeling alone, and still waiting for him to change his mind," she said softly as she smelt smoke in her nose, "do you smell that?"

"It smells like smoke," Jaken said looking around, "it smells like we are sitting on it. But there are no flames near by."

"Ha ha ha ha!" a laugh came from around making Rin pull out her sword as she a young boy with blonde hair golden eyes appeared. He was a couple of years younger then Rin. It was the boy from her vision; "I thought I'd find you here. It took that mutt hanyou and his weak demon half-brother to leave you by your lonesome."

"They'll be back any moment now!" Rin yelled as Jaken lifted his staff. Rin's eyes widened as youkai popped up around her, "um…"

--

"I can't put out this fire!" Shippo squealed as he tried to pull some children out of the burning flames.

"Here!" Miroku yelled throwing something into the fire absorbing it while dodging an attack. Sesshomaru used his whip knocking down some enemy. He stood there as one of the youkai's threw a weak attack at him.

"This is too easy!" Sango yelled as she threw her boomerang tearing down the weak enemy.

"A little too easy!" Kagome yelled as she used her special miko arrows, "Kohaku go find Rin and check on her!"

"I'll go!" Sesshomaru yelled pushing the kid back and beating him to the chase. Kohaku got off the ground shaking his fist.

"Don't touch my girl!!!" Kohaku yelled, as Sesshomaru had already been long gone. He smelt the smell of smoke as the forest Rin had been in was surrounded in smoke and fire.

"Rin," he breathed running faster. When he reached the spot he had left Rin, Jaken, and Ah-un the only one who was there was Ah-un who looked wounded. The creature looked at him before slowly getting up.

"Squawk!" it said trying to get up but Sesshomaru just patted him gently.

"Rest I will come back for you later," Sesshomaru said following the tracks into the forest at full speed trying to ignore the heavy sent of blood and fire, 'oh god please do not let me be too late,' he thought as he lifted his sword from it's sheath, 'let me die before her,' he though as he followed her scent. Jaken lay on the ground with wounds all over, "Jaken?"

"Lord… Sesshomaru," Jaken said in a weak voice, "I will live… find Rin. She has been… my greatest accomplishment. She is still… alive."

"I will be back for you," he said before taking off through the forest as the flames slowly started to spread.

"You will, pay, for… what you have done," Rin said breathing heavy as she had lost most of her strength.

"I will absorb you and your chi-spirit's," the young man said looking at Rin. Your power will be mine and then I will be unstoppable Liosalfar," the guy said walking to the sweaty, bloody girl. Dead youkai lay around her.

"You have the wrong person," Rin said looking at the young boy, "you are the one who can see into other places. I saw you watching me."

"Ah!" she screamed as she felt a pain inside of her. Something was squeezing her body so she could not move. Sesshomaru heard her scream and tried to find away to not show he was there.

"I smell your weak youkai. I will kill you in front of him and then devour your body," he said as he stood over her with his hand above her chest as she let out a painful gasp. There was a pink and yellow glow between her heart and his hand. Sesshomaru swung his sword yelling 'Sooryuha,' he then remembered that he had Rin. The guy dropped Rin as she fell unconsciously to the ground protected by the necklace that visibly hung out of her shirt. Sesshomaru looked around for the boy who had disappeared. He then ran to Rin who lay on the ground covered in dirt and blood. He listened to her chest for a heart beat. She was still alive; he lifted her into his arms looking down at her as he walked out. He knew it was probably his only chance to ever do it. He gently kissed her forehead and then just as quickly her lips. As much as he wanted to do it again he stopped himself.

Inuyasha and the rest of them were waiting for them to return from the burning forest with Jaken and Ah-un. Sesshomaru walked out of the burning forest with black soot on his and her face from the flames. They all gasped at how Rin looked. Her clothes were torn in several places as well many scratches and bruises, and a few deep wounds. Kagome quickly got out her first aid kit and cleaned off her wounds. They then quickly road back to the town that had been recovered from the weak attack. They were given shelter and medically looked after. Rin woke up and blinked before sitting up. There was a small scar over her heart; she gently traced it with her finger before getting off of the bed feeling the cold hardwood floor beneath her. She walked out and saw the others talking in a room. Sesshomaru however was not there he was waiting for her outside. She did not smile at him as she usually did.

"You should rest Rin," he said softly as he looked down at the bandaged girl afraid to let his knees give in and ask forgiveness for leaving her there, "you were brave today."

"Sometimes we have to be, even when we don't know how to," she said remind him of how grown up she had been becoming.

"Rin are you alright?" he asked looking at her as she looked down at the ground, "are you afraid?"

"I'm not afraid of much, and I don't need much Sesshomaru. But…suddenly I am small and the world is big. All around me is fast moving, surrounded by so many things and suddenly… I wonder how it feels to be different from me. I am young and I am free, but I get tired and I get weak Sesshomaru. I get lost and I can't sleep but suddenly… it's changed," Rin said trying to not show her shakiness.

"Rin I am sorry I left you today," he said turning to walk away. Tears threatened and stung her eyes.

"Lord… Sesshomaru?" Rin asked trying to let the words portray her tears, "would you cry if I had died? Would you cry with me if I were dying?"

"You need your sleep Rin. You do not know of what you are talking about," he said feeling tears threaten his own eyes… the eyes that rarely if ever cried. Rin walked passed him towards the forest making him look at her with suspicion. He slowly followed her to where a creek sat softly flowing as she cried. The tears fell with such fury even he feared them, "Rin?"

"Lord Sesshomaru," was all she said between her sobs. He saw down beside her as he listened to the babbling creek.

"What is wrong Rin?" he asked giving into the moment. He looked over at the girl with her head hung low.

"He looked like you," she cried looking over at him, "the son of Naraku and… Kugura."

"What are you trying to say?" he asked getting defensive, "Kugura and I never…"

"So when I was looking at him… it felt as if you were the one ripping my heart out," she cried into her knees, "it felt like you were the one who wanted to hurt me. Though I know it wasn't you… it was like looking into your face."

"Rin," he said shocked at her words. He wiped the tears from her eyes.

"It felt like the one I care about the most, the one I trusted before anyone… just wanted me gone," Rin cried as she looked into his eyes. The hurt in her eyes was so overwhelming. He pulled her into a hug he had not expected himself to pull her into. They stayed that way awhile as she cried into his chest. They ended up falling asleep with her on his chest. The morning woke Sesshomaru up to the sound of birds, the creek, and Rin's heavy breathing. He looked at her with a smile; she looked so peaceful there in his arms. He felt so peaceful there with her in his arms. He sighed before lying his head back down as she laid there with her head on his chest and his arm over his stomach and her hand resting bellow his chest. His arm slowly curled around her protectively. What if this could always be his? All he had to do was suck in his pride and just tell her he wanted her in his arms forever.

'She… is everything. She is… a human. She's moody, she is a soft place to lay next to, a warm conversation I don't want to miss, a fighter when she is mad… and a lover when she is loving. She is everything I wanted… and everything I need. But I can't… when I think about her I go on and on and on, because… she is everything to me. But how could this happen?' he asked in his head as he looked down at the girl sleeping peacefully on his chest. He smiled as he felt her breath against his chest, 'she is the giver I wish I could be. She is… the hand I want to be holding. If I could talk about her I would go on and on. If only I could let go of this foolish youkai pride. She is the voice I love to here, and she is that wooden rocking chair I want rocking beside me. Every day that passes, I only love her… come to think about it she is the only one I'd lay my own life down for. But I because of my pride I cannot have the one person I need.'

"Sesshomaru," she said softly startling him nearly making him throw her off. He quickly closed his eyes; he opened one to see if she had gotten up. She didn't so he opened both eyes and then began to look at her again with a smile. What peace it was though he didn't want her to know he knew what was going on. Her hand rose up his chest resting on begging of his shoulder giving him the chills. He heard her sigh and he couldn't help but think.

'I must be doing something right,' as he looked at her. He softly said, "Anywhere you want to go… show me the way. I am open to suggestions, whatever you say. I want to give you what you want… whatever it takes, but I cannot give me what I want."

"Sesshomaru?" she asked looking up at him. He looked down at her realizing she had wakened her with his words. She yawned before sliding her hand back down to the bottom of his chest and propping herself up. Chills and a tingly sensation took over his body. She looked around with sleepy eyes.

'It was such a gentle touch, but more then I could take. It is a natural thing, and I do believe that… she is my reason to be. Why… why her? I am not the same man I once was… I learned there was more this life that I certainly found. She looks at me so differently then others. Whatever it is I will always be under her spell… I could search this entire world. But I know I will never find anyone as perfect as her for me, which is why this is so much harder. Why is she something I can't live without?' he thought as he looked at her, "I didn't want to wake you. I know you need your rest."

"Oh," she said her hope slowly drifting off, 'I don't believe him. But at the same time… I do.'

"Should we head back? If you want to leave we will leave," he said staying in the spot hoping she would lay back down with him. She shook her head no making him want to smile at how her hair looked. A dangerous and wicked grin Rin had never seen crossed his face, "then… what shall we do out here?"

"Sess… Sesshomaru?" she asked trying not to laugh at the look he was giving her. She placed her hand on his head, "are you feeling alright?"

"I haven't for awhile," he said swallowing as her hand rested on his head, 'is this it? Am I going to confess to her?'

"Let's jump in the water," Rin said smiling at him, "that will cool you off!"

'I don't think that could even cool a youkai like this off,' he said swallowing nervously, "I'm fine I will watch you Rin."

"Okay," she shrugged before standing up and walking off to the water. She walked into the water letting it cool her achy bones. Rin danced in the water feeling it sprinkle as her dress dragged her down into the water. Sesshomaru smiled as she tried to get up as the dress dragged her down. She stood in the water trying to fix her tangled hair. Sesshomaru was tired of being the one who sat behind all the time. He looked around and saw a vine. He grabbed it and jumped pushing off the tree and grabbing Rin making her scream as they flew the air. He let go as they both flew apart and hitting the water. She laughed as she came up from bellow the surface. She smiled as his perfect face appeared water dripped off of him. Who would believe a regular plain human girl would be next to a powerful handsome youkai lord? He swam to her filling his sad golden eyes with her chocolate brown ones. She smiled as he sat in front of her. They sat there a moment both trying to stay above the water. They both swam out back to the bank he shook himself sending water all over her. She laughed, "Hey!"

"Sorry," he said looking at her blankly, 'this is too much for this Sesshomaru.'

"Sesshomaru?" she asked getting brave as she looked up into his golden eyes.

"Yes Rin," he said replying to her. He hated this conflict. He was supposed to know everything he was a lord.

"Do… you ever think you made a mistake saving me?" she asked looking down as she twiddled with her soaking wet dress. He swallowed not knowing how to answer and be the same youkai he always had been.

"At times Rin," he said making her turn her head to the side as it was still lowered. His finger reached out and gently pulled her face towards her trying to not scratch her, "but then I remember it was a mistake worth making. Which is why I can never love you Rin. Not the way you need me to. I cannot even let myself get any closer."

Authors note: Sorry to leave you here I am tired and I passed my five page mark… it's almost seven pages long ha ha ha! I hope some reviews this time and gives me something to encourage me to keep going!


	9. 8: I'd lie

Chapter 8: I'd lie

Authors note: okay I decided to start writing more at 4:00 AM either I am dedicated to you all or I am… hmm how do I put it mental? That does it lol! I am thinking about throwing a little cosmopolitan magazine Rin's way in the future. Think I could have some funny fun with that! Sorry that this isn't on track very well… this is my first Inuyasha fiction story so I don't know why I got myself into. I am gunna start a new fic soon here and start on my others so unless I get many reviews the chapters won't be consistant I won't stop unless my internet gets turned off… but they won't be a new one every day like usual lol.

"Lord Sesshomaru?" she asked as she looked at him with a look that made him turn away afraid of the spell it would have over him. Not that Sesshomaru no way!

"Rin you must understand," he said looking to her seriously, "Rin you should go…"

"Why do you always tell me to leave? Can you not handle the sight of me?!" she yelled angrily. Sesshomaru looked away with frusteration.

"That is not the problem Rin," Sesshomaru said to her softly, 'the problem is I can't stand not looking at you. I can't get you off of my mind, I try to tell myself to a million times.'

"Then why is it so hard for you?" she asked looking up at him, "why is it so hard for you to love me… the way I love you?"

"Enough Rin," he said pushing her aside and walking away feeling her break him apart. She stood there looking at him.

'Because I think you do,' she thought to herself as she held her heart in pain. Rin walked back to where everyone sat waiting for her as well Sesshomaru. He sat deep in thought; Rin would not look at him.

"Where are we going to go?" Shippo asked jumping onto Rin's shoulder.

"Well we cannot do anything until we know what is going on. I had some men scour the world looking for information to bring to me. We should go back to my castle," Sesshomaru said coolly as if nothing was bothering him. Rin looked over to him as he tried hard not to look at her. The group did not hesitate at the idea of a place to rest for a while. Kohaku walked to Rin who looked bummed.

"Are you alright my love?" Kohaku asked lifting her hands to his lips. She rolled her eyes before looking to Sesshomaru who was watching intensely.

"Now that you're here," she said looking at him with a disappointed look, "yes…"

"Grrr," Sesshomaru growled to himself before turning to lead the pack. The group traveled for days until they reached the castle that belonged to the great lord Sesshomaru. They passed by the villages that belonged to him… he was practically a king. They finally made their way up to the castle. Rin looked over to the boy sitting beside her, so plain that she could have a normal life. Then she looked to Sesshomaru so elegant and beautiful, everything she had wanted… so it came down to a family-less life serving her lord, or a family and a home with Kohaku or anyone else.

"My lord!" a servant said bowing as Sesshomaru walked past the old youkai man, "we have a couple of scouts left. You are just in time for dinner!"

"YES!" Shippo yelled jumping up on Inuyasha. Rin snickered at Shippo before following side by side with Kohaku. Rin looked at Kohaku when he grabbed her hand and held it.

"Kohaku," she laughed at him as he looked at her with pleading eyes.

"We can move to Kagome's time, you and I," he said looking at her with hopeful eyes, "we can get married and… I will do anything you ask."

"Kohaku," she said a little shocked as Sesshomaru's ears went back and twitched as he listened to Kohaku offer her a normal life. He sighed thinking maybe she would be better off, then the thought of him being without her nearly made him smash something… particular Kohaku's human pretty-boy face. They were showed to their rooms where they could get freshened up for dinner. Kagome and Sango experimented on Rin with make up from Kagome's time. Rin looked so adorable with the make up on, though she always looked better natural.

"Sesshomaru?" Rin asked as she walked into his room. He looked over at her placing down a flute. She smiled; it had been awhile since she had accidentally walked in on him playing the flute.

"Rin?" he asked placing the silver flute down. Rin had never seen his room before, she looked around in aw, "what are you doing?"

'Studying your golden eyes,' she thought as she looked at his handsome eyes, "dinner is ready. They sent me to get you."

"Thank you Rin," he said as she turned and walked away, "oh and Rin."

"Yes," she said stopping holding the door open.

"What's on your face?" he asked making her give him and angry look that caught him off guard, "it looks fine."

"Right," she said realizing a compliment when he gave one. When she left he let a smile escape his lips. Everyone met for dinner they were met by youkai who had been advisors and in charge of the army that Sesshomaru had countless times said he did not need to protect his fortress and assets. His eyes wondered to Rin who was stabbing at her food sitting next to Kohaku. A beautiful youkai woman walked in catching everyone's attention. Rin looked up as the woman's hand glided across Sesshomaru's arm. Sesshomaru did not move let alone acknowledge the long golden haired youkai. She sighed before taking her place next to him.

"Who is she?" Shippo asked a little loudly to Miroku making her red eyes wonder to Shippo. Shippo gulped before sinking into his seat a little.

"I am Hachia Sesshomaru's fiancée," Hachia said answering Miroku's voice. Rin's head snapped looking from her to Sesshomaru who had a frustrated look on his face. His eyes glanced up to hers pleading for understanding, but he got none as she stood up and left the room. Sesshomaru sighed and before Kagome could chase down Rin he was up and out the door after her.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome asked still standing up, "is it possible for you brother to love?"

"Keh! I don't know," Inuyasha said still wolfing down the high quality food, "perhaps. I mean I never thought I would love."

"Hmm," Kagome said smiling sitting down.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru said walking a fast but steady pace. She would not stop as she threw the doors open breathing in fresh air, "Rin stop now!"

"What!" Rin yelled stopping catching Sesshomaru off guard. Sesshomaru knew why she was mad, "please leave me alone."

"You do not get to ask me that," Sesshomaru said using his authority.

"You know I am not always going to be around for you to push around. What will you do then? Pick up another stray so you can push something around?" Rin asked hastily with a womanly vengeance in her eyes.

'Rin you alone can help me,' he thought looking at her, "is that why you think I saved you?"

"No, but it sure as hell seems that way," Rin said standing in front of him. He smiled down at the fire she radiated, "this is not funny!"

"Rin I saved you because I needed to," Sesshomaru said looking at her with a smile. Her face softened as his hands squeezed her arms.

"Do you love her? Is that why you cannot love me?" Rin asked looking up at him seriously.

"This Sesshomaru will never love," he said the wind blowing his hair, "at least not the way you want me to…"

"Enough with what I want you too Sesshomaru! Is there anything… anything at all? Is there anything inside of your heart because I know you have one I've seen it!" she yelled catching him off guard before he yelled back.

"You're the only damned human I've let follow me! Let alone yell at me!" he yelled looking at her his grip on her arms tightening, "your in my heart and you know that!"

"Tell me what else can I do? Tell me what else can I say? The closer that I get to you the further you push me away… and I don't know where to go," she said looking at him, "and I don't know anymore why I stay. Do you even care? Or am I some little game you play?"

"Don't go anywhere," he said looking at her seriously. Rin drooped her shoulders as she looked up at him, "stay here… forever. You know I… have you in my heart Rin."

"Are you ever going to need me Sesshomaru? Like I need you? Are you ever going to want me Sesshomaru? The way I want you too? I know that I am in your heart, but down deep inside I know you do… but are you ever going to love me the way I love you?" she asked but he didn't say anything as if he was ignoring though he was intensively listening to the words he wanted to hear from her, "I never know how you feel, because I cannot read your mind. Do I just keep waiting? Or am I just wasting time? Are you ever going to need me like I need you? Are you ever going to want me like I want you? And… are you ever going to love me Sesshomaru?"

"Rin… I have told you I can't. You're a human there is… I cannot ever accept you the way you want me to. But maybe someday Rin, but not today, not tomorrow… but perhaps someday," Sesshomaru said looking down at a teary eyed Rin.

"Then it breaks my heart to say this but I have to because my life is short Sesshomaru. I am going back to Kagome's time with Kohaku," she said sighing, "I will leave soon. You gave me the choice to choose, though my choice maybe late. But as much as I am going to miss you, I… cannot wait forever for I do not have forever to wait. But perhaps someday… someday I will return…"

"I'm sorry it came to this. I wish… wish you the best of luck," he said before turning around and walking away, 'turn around you fool! Turn around and beg her to stay!'

'He stood there and then walked away. Apparently I meant nothing,' she thought to herself standing as he walked so calmly away.

--

"Rin?" Kagome asked after knocking. Rin stopped packing her stuff. Kagome looked around in shock.

"Yes Kagome," Rin said aggressively shoving her stuff into her pack. Kagome shut the door and sat on the bed. Rin looked at herself in the mirror before a tear fell down, "am I ugly?"

"What?!" Kagome said in shock. She gripped Rin's shoulders and looked in the mirror with her, "You beautiful Rin! Hold on maybe your losing it. I know you cry but don't tell anyone, I know you're tied together with a smile… but your coming undone over Sesshomaru. Is he even worth it?"

"How could you ask that Kagome?" Rin asked before jumping at a knock on the door. Jaken walked in and shut it.

"I have to agree with Kagome," Jaken said looking at his daughter, "sorry I have good hearing. And I was ease dropping… for Lord Sesshomaru of course. He wanted to see if Rin was serious about leaving."

"Tell him I am serious about leaving! I am packing! Does he not believe I will leave? Ohhhh I will show that pompous jerk!" Rin yelled angrily before Jaken sat her down.

"Why do you even care whether or not he loves you?" Jaken asked patting her knee, "I love you, you bratty child."

"I care because…" Rin thought about it a moment and all of there moments, "because of the times he tells me about his life and I count the colors in his eyes. He told me he will never fall in love but I laugh because I hope he is wrong. I could tell you his favorite color is white, he likes to argue, his brother almost looks like him, he has his fathers eyes, and if you ask me if I love him… I'd lie. He looks around the room; innocently over looks the truth… should a light go on doesn't he know that I've had him memorized for so long? He sees everything black and white; never let anybody see him cry. I don't let anyone see me wishing he were mine. He stood there and then walked away, and if I could only have told him I would have told him I hold every breath for him. He'd never tell you he plays the flute… very well at that. I think he can see through everything but my heart, first thought when I wake up is 'my god he is beautiful,' and then pray for a miracle."

"Rin?" Jaken asked never realizing how much she had always loved him, "after ten years away from him and you still have him memorized."

"I never forgot it. Any of it," Rin said softly, "but he'll think about me. So this is good-bye. Tell Kohaku to meet me outside if he wants to go with me."

"Can't you wait for me?" Kagome asked looking at Rin.

"I am not a child anymore. Goodbye Kagome… come and find me," she said hugging Kagome as she put her backpack on her back, "I guess the only blessing I have left to my name is not knowing what we could have been, or what we should have been."

"DAUGHTER!" Jaken wailed hugging her neck as she squeezed him, "I love you. Be safe."

"Don't worry I'll be fine," Rin said hugging her father before standing up. On her way out Kohaku was already at her door.

"You're leaving?" Kohaku asked the one girl he was infatuated with.

"Yes and your coming with right?" Rin asked curiously before walking forward. The two of them stole off into the night leaving a worried Kagome and Jaken. As Jaken walked through the hall looking down and lonely Sesshomaru spotted him.

"Jaken," Sesshomaru's strong voice cam as he walked into view, "has she finally put her stuff away?"

"IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!" Jaken yelled angrily with teary eyed, "you and you damned pride!"

"Jaken?" he asked as Jaken stormed off down the hall. Sesshomaru angrily walked after his servant, "how dare you talk to me like that you stupid toad!"

"You stupid boy!" Jaken was so outraged it actually made Sesshomaru a little nervous his old friend had lost his mind, "she left her heart so right in your hands! You stole her every dreams and you crushed her plans! You stupid boy!"

"She… left?" Sesshomaru asked with a look of shock on his face. Jaken nodded, "she actually left? She choose to and I will not stop her."

"She was precious to me like a flower! She grew wild and wild with innocence. A perfect prayer in a desperate hour, she was everything beautiful and different… stupid foolish boy. Did you think you could fence her in and give her nothing in return? She is like the wind and now she is gone!"

"Jaken?" Sesshomaru asked looking to his servant with guilt, "I didn't want to hold her here. I wanted her to be happy."

"It is one way to treat me the way you do. I can live with that, but Rin deserved better. Could you not see who she was?" Jaken asked outraged, "so what made you think you could take her life and push it around? You must have built yourself up so high, you had to take her heart and break it down!"

"No I did not such thing," Sesshomaru growled angrily, "this is best for her. I gave her a choice."

"You stupid boy… why do you think you always have to be right? You don't know it yet but you've just lost the only thing that has ever made you feel alive," Jaken said shaking his head finally feeling calmer, "Sesshomaru milord. She knows you better then you think, which is why she left. She knew everything about you, more then I had ever known. You may not have intended to break her down but you did. It took her awhile before she could run, but now that she knows she is long gone. She is gone."

"I…" Sesshomaru looked down at the ground. He took off running down the stars and out of the door. When he had gone far away he stop realizing he could not find her, "she's gone… I can't lose her and I won't! She loved me and she left me, oh please let her know I am sorry oh I am so sorry! She might never come back."

"I can't go anymore Rin," Kohaku breathed feeling tired. Sesshomaru heard the boy's voice. Sesshomaru walked out from the trees scaring both Rin and Kohaku.

"Sess… Sesshomaru?" she asked looking at him. She had by that time thought he wouldn't come for her.

"Rin we need to talk," he said his perfect jawline tensing at the sight of her. For nearly two hours he had been without her and for those two hours he felt like he had walked another two decades. Rin walked with him aways away from Kohaku.

"Sesshomaru why did you come? I'm trying to sweep out all of the ruins that my emotions have left. I am feeling tired of this and the baggage that seems to still exsist," Rin said looking up at him, "actually I am glad you came back for me."

"You are?" Sesshomaru asked looking down at Rin under the shining moones bright light and the stars twinkling midnight dance.

"Now I can tell you to take your freedom, take your memories I don't need them, take your space and take your reasons but you'll think of me. We have nothing left to talk about, in fact I feel a whole lot better but you will think of me. This may be cocky of me, but someday Sesshomaru I am going to come across your mind. Don't worry I will be fine, I am going to be all right. And while you are sleeping with your pride wishing I could hold you tight… I will be over you," Rin said swallowing, "but right now… I want you to stop me."

"What?" he asked as she slapped her hand to her mouth.

"Nothing," she said turning to leave. He grabbed her arm and turned her around so he could look into her eyes.

"I don't want you to go," he said looking down at her seriously. Rin looked up at him, she wanted to give in but knew she had to choose.

"Sesshomaru I opened my heart and I let you in. I promised I'd never love again, and I am still doing what I said I'd do… but I know I have to get over you," she said looking up at him seriously, "I am doing both of us a favor Sesshomaru. I am doing me a favor so that I can save my heart anymore pain, and I am saving you from being forced into feeling something you don't feel for my sake because I know you care. You're a good person youkai or not it doesn't matter… just know that I've never ever felt the way I have about you that I have anyone. I've never forgotten you and I don't believe I ever will. Living might mean taking chances, but they are worth taking. Love might be a mistake, but just so you know… it's been worth making. If I never knew you Sesshomaru, I would never felt what is real. I never thought that love… could be so beautiful."

"Rin," he said grabbing her hand as she turned to leave. She looked back at him as he tried to get the courage and do what he never could, "if I never knew you, if I never… I would never have a inkling of how precious life could be. If I never met you I would never have a clue at last how I find in you the missing part of me Rin. In this world so full of hate, full of rage, and lies… I can see the truth so clear in your eyes. I am so greatful to you; I have lived my whole life lost… if I never knew you. Rin you're my friend and…"

"That is just it Sesshomaru! Your so blinde to what I say! I hate you sometimes!" Rin yelled making him turn and walk away in deep thought. She stopped yelling and slumped over rolling her eyes. It took her a moment before following after Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru paced in irritation of what had happened. He tried so hard to keep himself from falling in love with a human… with Rin. Not just a human, how could he say that! How could he try and fool his heart like that! Sesshomaru let out a growl of frustration, 'we are friends who share secrets. She knows everything that is on my mind. But something has changed that I cannot deny. A voice in my head keeps saying… why don't you kiss her? Why don't you tell her? Why don't you let her see the feelings you hide? She'll never know if you never show the way you feel inside,' Sesshomaru sat down thinking to himself as the fireflies danced around, 'I'm so afraid to make that first move. Just the idea of crossing the line... the possibility. But every time she is near I want to never let her go and to confess to her what my heart is trying to scream, but my pride and past hold it down. What would she say? I wonder if she would just turn away, or would she promise me she is here to stay?'

"Sesshomaru?" a soft voice came from beyond warning him Rin was approaching. Rin cleared the bushes to see Sesshomaru sitting.

"Leave Rin," Sesshomaru said silently.

"I am tired of you telling me what to do! I am not a child anymore…" she lectured as his heart began to lecture him, "one minute your telling me to stay and now to leave!"

'Why don't you kiss her?' His mind asked him and then a tiny voice whispered, 'tell her you love her…'

"I'm sick of trying to prove to you Sesshomaru that I am not going anywhere if you just give me a reason to stay! You act as if I am just another human…" she kept lecturing him while on her knees before him.

'Why don't you tell her?' his mind said giving in to his heart, 'tell her you need her…'

"You treat me as if I mean nothing!" she yelled getting teary eyed frustrated with his constant denial of feelings for her. And the fact that he looked as if he bluntly was ignoring her, "this is why I decided to leave Sesshomaru! Stop ignoring me!"

'Why don't you let her see the feelings your hiding?' that voice said his head as he watched what he thought as the most beautiful of all creations before her, 'she'll never know if you never show the way you feel inside. Why don't you kiss her…'

"Sesshomaru… I know you keep telling me you don't…" she was cut off when his long arm wrapped around her and pulled her to him his lips falling to hers, "Sessh… Sesshomaru?"

"I never thought that love could feel like this… you've changed my world with one look, one breath, one kiss, each touch" he said swallowing nervously, "I told myself not to love a human. But you are more to me then a human Rin. And I want you to be the one who is… just the thought of you leaving for permanent in Kagome's time… with Kohaku tares me apart Rin I can no longer deny this. Rin, can you see the heart I know I possess because of you? Can you reassure me that I have not lost you?"

"Sessh, Sesshomaru," Rin said shakily. It was all happening at once and she didn't know how to react. Just a few days ago he told her he did not desire her in anyway! Just three hours ago he said he'd never love… and now he was telling her he was in love with her!

"I understand Rin," Sesshomaru said letting her go and looking off into the distance as cold as he was before he confessed his heart. Rin looked at him breathing heavily.

"I've always been yours you idiot!" She yelled at him making him look to her with burrowed eyebrows, "Did you think that could ever change! I told you I was going to be with you forever!"

"Rin?" he asked breathlessly as his hand found her face before she quickly smashed her lips into his, "are you sure about this?"

"More sure then I've ever been," she said feeling her heart beat fast, "but… I thought you could never love a human?"

"I thought so too," he laughed making her smile, "but you changed that Rin. You changed many things about me… like my heart. I thought I hid it so well, I would never show I had a heart like my father and half-bred brother. But… things changed and it looks like the love for a human girl runs in my blood. A green wise youkai once said that loving his human daughter, may have been his weakness… but it made him stronger. He was right."

"Sesshomaru," she said looking at him with watery eyes, "why didn't you ever tell me? How do I not know that you're just saying this to keep me here?"

"Because if I didn't love you I wouldn't care whether or not you were here," he said looking at her with passionate eyes, "Rin…"

"Yes?" She asked as she laid her head on his chest listening to the pounding of his heart.

"Don't go loving on nobody but me," he said as he wrapped his arms around her, "nobody but me is going to love you like you should be loved. Nobody but me is going to cry the day you leave. You can do what you please… but please don't go loving anyone but me. I know I took my time to tell you how I feel, just because I took so long doesn't mean it isn't real. Rin I've always seen you in my future, I just never… thought I'd be able to hold you like this?"

"I thought you'd never hold me like this," Rin said closing her eyes tight, "I fear opening my eyes and finding it was all a dream."

"My, my… look what I've found here. I look for a youkai lord… and find him with a human," a wicked voice said from the darkness.

Authors note: Sorry to leave it here but I wanted to hurry and just get these two together since they seem to love each other SOOO flippen much lmao! But anwhoo I am starting a new story and for some reason my computer will not catch correction problems so if there are misspelled words I apologize.


	10. 9: I shouldn't but I do

Chapter 9: I shouldn't but I do…

Authors note: THANK YOU FOR THE REVIEWS!!!! I LOVE YOU ALL.

Sesshomaru stood in front of Rin defensively as the creature came out from the shadows. Rin gasped at its horendice smell as it cocked its head laughing at her. The eyes slowly shifted to Sesshomaru whose hand was ready on the hilt of his sword. The creature walked out standing tall like a human with horns as sharp as knives.

"A human? Is that your choice?" the youkai laughed looking at him with disgust, "my how the mighty has fallen. She is not even like us Sesshomaru. Disgraceful, shameful, it is youkai like you and your father who bring those pathetic hanyou's like your disgusting half brother."

"Hold your tongue for I will rip it out of your filthy head," Sesshomaru said lifting the sword from its sheath.

"Sesshomaru," Rin gripped his strong arm feeling his muscles tense with nervousness she looked up at him feeling the change in his pulse.

"Rin leave," Sesshomaru said looking back at her pleadingly.

"But Sesshomaru," Rin tried to protest but Sesshomaru gave her a 'my word is law' look that made her turn. The youkai held up a hand laugh before Sesshomaru could stop her she was flung back from a barrier surrounding them.

"You bastard!" Sesshomaru yelled fling his sword at the enemy, "Sooryuha!"

"Haha ha!" the youkai laughed looking at Sesshomaru as he dodged the attack, "there is barrier… no one can enter, or leave."

"Sooryuha!" he yelled angrily and carelessly nearly getting Rin as she covered her head and screamed.

"Should I kill the girl now or should I wait and let her watch her youkai love make a fool of himself and disgrace her as he fails in saving her life?" the youkai laugh as half his face looked as if someone had been melting it off. Rin looked to Sesshomaru who tried to keep a calm and cool face. How could he be so calm at such a time, but she didn't know… his heart was beating so fast he thought it would burst taking his own life instantly.

"It is you who shall die Morgnu," Sesshomaru said trying to control his breathing. The demon just sat watching him before Sesshomaru turned into his demon form. Rin looked up at the huge demon that was once a heavenly looking lord. Morgnu laughed before transforming into his demon form. He resembled a large goat and lion thrown together, not as glamorous as the giant demon dog. The two growled and circled before the lion head attacked throwing fire at Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru leaped out biting Morgnu on the neck letting the poison sink in. Sesshomaru was hit with one of Morgnu's horns making Sesshomaru fall over a moment. Rin gasped as Sesshomaru jumped out of the way landing on Morgnu's back biting him before being hit with the pokey tail. It was that way for about seven minutes before Morgnu attacked Rin. The creature was caught off guard when the necklace lit up throwing back Morgnu. He turned attacking Sesshomaru again knocking him over unexpectedly. He bit into Sesshomaru making him howl in pain. Rin ran towards them and when Sesshomaru saw her running to him he quickly pushed the creature off. Rin stopped her heart pounding.

Sesshomaru leaped onto the back of the creature biting into it's neck before the creature launched the giant dog demon into the air and jumping onto his back so that Sesshomaru couldn't get him off. Sesshomaru growled in agony. Rin's eyes got watery before Sesshomaru looked to her and said.

"Rin… argh! Run!" Sesshomaru tried so hard to get the creature ripping at his flesh to move but he was more focused on Rin… his light in all of his darkness," RUN DAMN YOU!"

"Uh," Rin didn't know what to do but his word was always law so she turned to leave teary eyed. When she got out of view she stopped herself and looked back. Would she deny her lord? Or follow her heart? She felt her body shake as she winced from the pain in Sesshomaru's howls.

'Why do they underestimate me?!' She thought angrily before puffing up her chest and turning around to see the two rolling around. For once Sesshomaru was not doing his best, he seemed weaker then she had remembered. She ran towards him grabbing rocks and throwing them. But as soon as the rock left her hand her eyes went a bright glowing blue and her aura changed. The rock changed growing in size and gaining blue and silver flames, "Veale har'dro buat'leb!"

"ARGH!" the creature un top of Sesshomaru screamed in pain looking at the huge hole blasted through his stomach, "what… kind of magic… is this… uh?"

"Rin?" Sesshomaru asked trying to stand up before falling down. Rin snapped out of the weird feeling. It was as if she totally forgot who she was for a moment. She looked at Sesshomaru before running to him as he laid on the cold ground breathing heavily. The light from the moon wavered over the trees as if trying to secretly watch the two. The wind stirred as she kneeled beside him as he began to transform into his human self. He coughed feeling himself slowly heal though he was in poor crippling pain. He made a face that screamed pain as he tensed. Rin looked over him terrified wrapping her arms around him not sure what to do. Sesshomaru closed his eyes feeling her humanly warmth wash over him for a second, but only a second… for the pain washed back over him, "Rin…"

"Yes?" She asked hesitantly, "anything I can do lord Sesshomaru?"

"I need you to get off of me," he said in a raspy voice leaving her speechless. She started to get up but he quickly grabbed her hand, "but… do not leave, not yet… for now just…"

"Lord Sesshomaru!?" she gasped following her knees as he got another flash of pain in his arms. It must have come with the package, for every time when he was done being his demon form he would get this painful pain! Just to add his added injuries. Kohaku was finally able to break through the barrier as the creature was weak and dieing.

"Rin?!" Kohaku yelled running to her glad to see her alive. She quickly demanded he find her water while she made a fire. Once the fire was going ad the water gathered she rinsed off his wounds looking down at him lovingly while he slept painfully. Kohaku sat in a corner completely furious on all of the attention the "youkai" was getting. Rin cleaned off his wounds and them placed hot rags she had torn off of her dress to place on his achy sore arms. 'What happened to him? He never did quite tell me how he got back his arms,' Rin thought before lying down beside him and watching him through the night.

--

Morning came with the calls of wide-awake birds ready to start their day. Sesshomaru looked over plainly and saw a tiny Rin curled up next to him. He tried to hide the smile that was slowly stretched across his face. Then his memory turned sour to the night before. He sighed realizing he was right all along and that perhaps they would be making a mistake.

'I cannot protect her as I thought I could. She deliberately disobeyed me, but… I would have, hmm, gotten a little more roughed up… she saved me. That doesn't change the fact that while I was momentarily weakened by that pathetic youkai who use to work for Naraku. And while I did so I could no longer have protected Rin… and she could have been hurt. Or worst… killed,' Sesshomaru thought with a pain in his chest as he looked at her sleeping peacefully, 'she would never understand. I cannot tell her I am leaving. I must leave on my own.'

With that Sesshomaru gently kissed her forehead trying to get rid of the awkward bug wing fluttering feeling in his stomach. He didn't understand them, and so he would ignore them. He looked at her face one last time picturing what his life could have been like. But her being human and him being a youkai got in the way. He stood up trying to gain back his emotionless posture. He looked down to her and thought, 'don't love anyone but me. As long as you live… don't love anyone but me.'

"Hmmm," Rin turned curling her hand gracefully under her head. He sighed before turning and walking away towards the castle hoping she'd get the point and go back to Kagome's time. A couple of hours Rin sat up looking around. Some how she had a nervous itchy feeling as if she had lost something, something important to her, "…Sesh… Sesshomaru?"

"Rin?" a deep voice said from behind her waking her from her worry. She turned her head to see a handsome man she recognized… Sesshomaru. She leaped up leaping into his eyes… not noticing the red in his eyes that was slowly changing to a golden hue.

--

"Sesshomaru?" a voice came from behind him making his golden eyes slowly turned around. Sesshomaru turned around to see his half brother there.

"Inuyasha? What are you doing here?" Sesshomaru asked his brother who almost looked liked him. Inuyasha's hair blew in the breeze before taking a couple of steps forward, Sesshomaru looked at hi brother with the same look that never seemed to change… except with Rin.

"I've come to tell you that I am taking Rin," Inuyasha said looking to his older brother. Sesshomaru's eyes burrowed low in confusion.

"Take care of her," Sesshomaru said as the breeze blew his hair so he looked similar as his younger brother.

"She deserves better then a disgusting youkai like yourself. I will make her my might so that you can watch her truly be happy. But first I will punish you for you ignorance and pain you've caused her!" Inuyasha yelled lifting out his sword making a light that blinded Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru covered his eyes but felt something slice at him. He quickly lifted his sword blocking the attack before Inuyasha leapt off without Sesshomaru seeing where.

"What just happened?" Sesshomaru asked out loud looking to the sky, "what has gotten into him? Was he serious? I will get my revenge on him!"

--

"Hey you guys!" a teenage Shippo pointed in the direction a giant cloud. The others noticed it was Sesshomaru's, "HEY SESSHOMARU!"

"Hmmm?" Sesshomaru said noticing the group and growling. He quickly lunged down pulling his sword out and fling it making them all fall back in terror. Inuyasha jumped out catching his older brothers attack.

"I thought you'd come around Sesshomaru. I knew you'd betray us," Inuyasha yelled looking his older brother in the eyes.

"It is you who has betrayed me. For this I shall show you no mercy. Sooryha!" Sesshomaru yelled swinging his sword as the others screamed falling down and Inuyasha leaped out of the way trying to protect Kagome, "I see you are a two timer to your women. Where is mine?"

"Keh! Huh?" Inuyasha looked stumped before raising his sword again. Sesshomaru just stared harder at his younger brother.

"Where is Rin!" Sesshomaru yelled, "forget it I will kill you and get it over with!"

"NO!" Kagome yelled up as Inuyasha stood there trying to prove something, "your wrong this isn't you Sesshomaru!"

"Stand out of the way Kagome this is between my back stabbing brother and I," Sesshomaru said plainly. Kagome looked to Inuyasha as he tried to push her out of the way.

"Ha there we go with your babble nonsense again. It will take me a second Kagome," Inuyasha said walking forward with a confident cocky smile. Sesshomaru was about to attack when Kagome ran forward again.

"Where is Rin!" she yelled making Sesshomaru stop and look at her.

"Isn't Rin with you?" Sesshomaru asked forgetting about Inuyasha who waited impatiently.

"No we've been looking for you three," Kagome said walking towards Sesshomaru before Inuyasha grabbed her not wanting her near him.

"My hanyou brother here confessed to me an hour ago that he plans to take Rin as his mate. Then he fled like a coward so back down Kagome!" Sesshomaru yelled with serious lack of patience.

"Sesshomaru!" Kagome yelled angrily, "you idiot! He has been with me ever since we left! He hasn't left my sight!"

"Wha… what?" Sesshomaru asked straightening himself out trying to not feel like a complete ass. Kagome's hands flew on her hips.

"We've been tricked, whoever it was thought well and hard on this. What better way to get rid of the great lord Sesshomaru and the great Inuyasha then to have the brother's kill each other? For some reason that I do not understand," Kagome said deep in thought, "where IS Rin?"

"Oh no… what if… that was all a set up? Sesshomaru asked before turning and running as fast as he could feel the wind trying to keep up with his demonic speed. Inuyasha had Kagome on his back as he chased after his brother. Kirara was behind them with Shippo, Moraku, and Sango on her back. Sesshomaru smelled for the place he had left her sleeping peacefully. Kohaku lay injured as Sango leaped off and ran to her brother's side immediately attending to his flesh wounds. Kohaku jumped when he saw Sesshomaru ready to try and escape.

"Sango!" Kohaku yelled in pain trying to reach for his weapon, "he…"

"It is alright it was an imposter," Sango said calming her brother down hastily. Kohaku glared at Sesshomaru as he walked through the forest sniffing for her lovely scent with anticipation. He locked onto it and hastily ran in that direction followed by the others. When they stopped they saw a meadow where someone who looked like Sesshomaru sat with Rin. As if watching a horror movie they could not get in.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru asked as she sat in front of him looking into his eyes. They weren't the same to her somehow though they were identical.

"Yes lord Sesshomaru? Rin said plucking the last pedal off of her flower. He brushed her hair aside from her shoulder so he could see her neck.

"Do you love me Rin?" he asked making chills run down her back, and not the kind that made her feel all warm and fuzzy.

"I do," Rin said looking at him with curiosity, "do you doubt that in anyway shape or form?"

"No Rin I do not," Sesshomaru said still watching her intensely as she went to nervously plucking the green grass from the earth, "which is why I wanted to ask you something."

"Yes Sesshomaru?" Rin asked looking at him with her honey brown eyes.

"Would you let me… mark you? So that I know NO other man may have you," Sesshomaru gave a look that made her want to smile with delight but confused with nervousness.

"I… guess," Rin said looking up at him, "I am already yours…"

"Then come here Rin," the man said with not much interest. She slowly moved towards him still on her knees. His hand wrapped around her neck pulling her closer to her but something didn't feel right. The real Sesshomaru kept trying his hardest to break the barrier. Rin pulled away making everyone let out his or her nervous breathe. Why would this person want to mate Rin? Why would they want to go to such GREAT lengths to mate her his mate?

"I'm sorry Sesshomaru. Right now it does not feel right… is weird as it sounds I do not think your…" before she could finish he cut her off grabbing her pulling her towards him. She let out a scream before words slipped from her mouth, "Har'dro kulggen!"

"What the…!" the imposter said as he was thrown back asthe earth grew up around her making her a shield like cocoon. Every attack he did upon it failed, he didn't know that the only way to break the stone cocoon also known as the earth shield was fire. Rin looked over and saw Sesshomaru and the others and then looked to the Sesshomaru she was stuck with. Her mind got filled and she became confused. The Sesshomaru she was with saw the others as well and released the large barrier, "I thought you two would be dead by now."

"Sorry to disappoint you!" Inuyasha yelled with anger. Inuyasha could feel something wasn't right, 'this has happened before… the trickery the illusionary. Kikyou…'

'Inuyasha…' Kagome thought as she looked to Inuyasha knowing what he had been thinking, "your time is up reveal yourself!"

"Not a problem," he said before bowing and revealing his true face when he stood up. It was the son of Naraku. He smiled with his hands behind his back. Sesshomaru walked in not expecting to have an attack thrown at him. He quickly blocked as Inuyasha ran at the young boy his sword flying. With the flick of his sword Inuyasha was blown backwards. Sango and Moraku jumped into action teaming up together to strengthen their attack catching Naraku's son off guard. Rin tried to beat her way out of shell until finally it shattered. What was going on with her? She felt the necklace on her neck get hotter before holding her hand out.

"Har'dro velven," Rin yelled as a sword of the earth formed. She quickly grabbed it no longer able to control herself as she attacked the son of Naraku. He blocked her attack but did not send her flying like the others. Rin glared at him as his smile faded to one of agony as her fingers gripped around his throat tightening. He quickly grabbed her tossing her aside.

"I'll deal with you later," he said as Rin went back to her original self before looking at the sword on the ground. While Sesshomaru and Inuyasha ganged up against Naraku's son Rin reached over and grabbed the sharp blade feeling strong magic flowing through it. She stood up sneaking around. When the son of Naraku was locked in battle mode she ran up behind him driving the sword through his abdomen. He stopped a moment making everyone look as he walked forward off of her blade. They all gasped looking at her. The son looked back at her before evaporating. Sesshomaru looked to Rin who had scratch on her cheek and was shaky. The others walked a ways away knowing that it was best to not let them "see" them watching them. Sesshomaru turned waiting for Rin to talk to him, but she did not say anything at all. She stood there looking at the back of him with a face of anger and confusion.

"I…" Sesshomaru sighed trying to find what to say.

"Why?" was all she could say, "do you not love me like I love you? Am I just some joke you play?"

"Rin," he said turning around looking at her unable to stand the sound of tears in her voice, "I was so afraid now I realize… love is never wrong and so it never dies."

"What are you saying? How do I know the words coming from your mouth aren't just… I don't even know why they are coming from your mouth," she said looking at the ground and backing up, "I knew he wasn't you… but I so badly loved you… love you."

"Rin I love you… I did it for a reason," he said stepping towards her.

"Why are you so cold and distant to me? The same way you've always been," Rin said looking at him feeling tears stab her eyes painfully.

"Rin I love you…. I shouldn't but I do. I am cold and distant because you're the only warmth and light I have in this cold dark world. And I cannot protect you…" he began before she interrupted, "but I wonder… if it is enough…"

"I use to always fake a smile so you couldn't see that I wanted and needed… everything we should be. You talk to me and I laugh at how funny it is that I can't even see… anyone when you're with me. I wonder if you know your all I think about at night?" she said looking at him shakily, "the world could shun me… could disown me. You would walk by me… and I wondered if you could tell I couldn't breathe. There you'd go again so perfectly, the kind of flawless I wish I could be…"

"You are Rin. I never thought I'd feel this way and you did it… you. You must understand I do it… because I want to protect you. That day the thought I might have lost it… I might have lost control… that is enough to make this Sesshomaru scared. I… me… I was scared Rin. Terrified, horrified, frightened… I would lose you. This is all I can give you and I worry if it is enough," he

"I don't need your protection! You're all I need to fall into!" she yelled running to him as he pulled her into his arms, "your all I need…"

"Rin your beautiful every little peace. I love you," he said letting her silky hair rub against his face, "but… how can this work?

"In a perfect world we'd never know… we'd never need to face this world alone Sesshomaru. They can have this world… we'll create our own. I may not be brave, strong, or smart… but in my heart I know love will find away. Anywhere I go I am home if you are there beside me like dark turning into day. Somehow we'll come through, now that we've found each other love will find away," Rin said looking at him with love.

"There IS a perfect world… and it is shining in your eyes. And if only they could feel it too the happiness I feel with you. Anywhere I go we're home if we are there together. Now that I have you Rin… I know we'll find away."

Sesshomaru… this is so unlike you! But it is you I know it is," she said looking up into his eyes, "I know you're the one I love. Sesshomaru…"

"But you'll see everyday that my love will never go away, I will never turn away… I will stand by your side filled with hope and pride Rin. We are more then we are we are one," Sesshomaru said looking down at her with a smile she had never seen before.

"Didn't I say that once before?" she smiled, "or something to that degree?"

"Here is something that you haven't said… Rin. Tears of pain, tears of joy, one thing nothing can destroy is our love deep inside… we will be one someday," Sesshomaru stroked her face, "but until then we are almost one, we are like the infant sky. Rin… I have to ask you something…"

--

"You were careless and reckless you fool!" a man yelled at the son of Naraku Maku. Maku rolled his eyes wincing as a nurse dealt with the painful wound.

"I will take her as my mate by force… so that I can transform her into the ultimate weapon, or steal her magic. But that girl will pay for this embarrassment… I shall tare her world apart, starting with her lover Sesshomaru," Maku said staring into space, 'I will destroy her; she will wish she never crossed my path. I will crush her under my foot.'

Authors note: Sorry I must end here. So I have a QUESTION FOR YOU FAITHFUL READERS.

My Internet is going to be turned off tomorrow night or the next day and we MIGHT go with another service. Should I risk leaving it here… or should I write something up just going through what I am going to do. Perhaps… a chapter on what happens and bla bla bla. Or should I just wait to see how it goes? It is up to you, whatever you guys choose but minority wins! Thank you though for reading and I hope you enjoy… what sucks is that well I have SOOOOOOO much planned for this… for twists and turns! So let us pray I keep my internet **winks** THANK YOU ALL!

LOVE,

Love4horses


	11. 10: Rejection 101

Chapter 10: Rejection 101

Rin sat with her legs dangling in the water as Sesshomaru sat a little ways away watching her making sure no danger was near. Rin looked back at him smiling, he did not smile back at her which she had not expected him to do… but his eyes lingered on hers before she looked at the ground trying to control the human reaction falling upon her cheeks. Sesshomaru noticed the pink softly and naturally painting her ever so soft cheeks. She went back to kicking the bottom of her feet into the water listening to the splashing noises as Sango worked on healing her brother. Her hair danced in the wind, in the dark, in the middle of the night… emotional touch touching his heart. He let out a sigh as he closed his eyes sniffing the air as her strong sweet scent made it's way to him. That girl always enjoyed the nature of life, why she did was a mystery to him… same as the reason she loved him.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome asked as she walked forward and sat on her knees in front of her mate. He looked up into her chocolate eyes trying to hold back a smile.

"Kagome," he said as she smiled up at him with her hands laid in her lap.

"What are we going to do? Things… aren't the way they use to be," Kagome said her smile slowly fading.

"I know we have this other son of Naraku to deal with. Harder then the last little brat that bastard spat out," Inuyasha shrugged before pulling her into his lap. She smiled before shaking her head no.

"I mean Sesshomaru and Rin," Kagome said looking at her love, "but that too…"

"What about my brother and his human?" Inuyasha said wrapping his arms around her as he rolled his eyes.

"Well our suspitions have been affirmed about their relationship Inuyasha," Kagome said realizing she let it slip. He burrowed his eyes and smiled.

"How do you know our accusations were true? Were you spying Kagome?" Iunyasha asked giving her a look she knew well.

"Don't give me that look! I happened to over here! But they are… a couple now," Kagome said looking at the love of her life. Time had caught up with Kagome's body, he breast were at its fullest and her curves were fully formed.

"Keh! What a hypocrite! Looks like loving humans is just a weakness in our bloodlines," Inuyasha said insensitively realizing his mistake when Kagome's eyes widened tearly as she stood up. When he jumped up to do some damage control that he became use to doing, but before he could reach her she yelled for him to sit and he went straight to the ground.

"Sesshomaru?" Rin asked as she looked over her shoulder at him. He looked at her so she knew she had his attention, "when I die…"

"Rin…" he said cutting her off but she just stood up and sat in front of him seriously.

"Sesshomaru please…" she said looking up into his radiant eyes, "I have to say this… please."

"Why?" he asked before giving into her pleading eyes, "what is it Rin?"

"When I am gone… I will be glad because I was blessed to have you in my life. When I look back on these days I will look and see your face. You've always been here for me. In my dreams I will always see you soar across the sky, in my heart you will always be there for all of my life. I will keep a part of you with me… and everywhere I am there you'll be," Rin said looking at him intently.

"Rin…" he said trying to stop her but she made it clear she wasn't finished.

"Sesshomaru you showed me how it feels to feel the sky within my reach, and I will always remember all the strength you gave to me. Your love made me make it through, I owe so much to you… you were right there for me," she said reaching up and touching his face as he closed his eyes leaning into her touch. Just the thought of it ending tore him to peaces, "Sesshomaru I always saw in you my light, my strength. So I want to thank you now for all the ways you were there for me… because I may never get to. I've had to come to terms I am human… my time with you is limited. But for every breath of my life span… I am yours Sesshomaru. No other can have nor take my heart unless they rip it from my chest, but never will anyone be in my heart the way you are."

"Rin…" he said looking at her shining eyes before pulling her face into his kissing her soft lips. The feeling left a tingly sensation in him, his hand fell on her head gently as the other wrapped around her waist pulling her closer. He felt the beat of his heart; the beat of his heart was tearing him apart… the beat of his heart was beating for her beat. He smiled as he pulled away letting his lips gently rest against hers. He felt her eye lashes gently graze against his cheek. He wanted so badly to just… his hand gripped tighter to her waist as he pulled her. He kissed her hungry for every second with her. It seemed like anywhere he went, anything he did made him think of her. He felt his hand move down her thigh and the sensation and feelings were to over whelming. Not now… not yet… he just couldn't. He quickly but as gently as possible pushed her off and walked off. Rin sat there stunned as to what happened. She blinked once her mouth still open and shock painted all over her confused face.

Sesshomaru stomped around not knowing what to do in that situation. He didn't know how to handle what had happened. He had so badly wanted to… he shuttered. He stopped to look up at the sky hoping he didn't shock Rin's ego too terribly. That girl was so spirited sometimes; perhaps that was why he loved her so much. She was opinionated, loving, sweet, caring, and when she was right she wouldn't back down… no matter how much power he had. He knew things would feel weird after that one, he was the one making the advances… and when she was willing to give in he couldn't go through with it. Was it because he wasn't as attracted to her as he thought? Then why did he feel the way he did. He sighed before slumping into the ground, 'boy what a workout relationships are.'

'Go talk to her,' his heart screamed at her, 'that is idiot talk. If he goes to talk to her he'll show just how weak she makes him. What do hearts know anything? Minds are more practical.'

'I'm losing it,' Sesshomaru thought leaning into his hands, "what am I going to do about this. Why can't I just do it? Am I afraid of her rejecting me in that way? Or do I just not want to make… her my mate for life?"

--

"Rin are you alright?" Sango asked as she finally found an angry Rin. Kagome wasn't far behind. She pushed through the brush panting from the long walk from their camp. She spent so little time practicing fighting youkai and more in her time or alone with Inuyasha that she was out of shape!

"Fhkhjhdsfh," Rin muttered with the brightest red cheeks of embarrassment and anger. Sango looked at Kagome was leaning over supporting herself on her thighs trying to catch her breath, "by the red in your eyes it must have been something Sesshomaru said. Guys have a tendency of doing that to a girl."

"Trust me this way different then any of your and Miroku's problems," Rin said still glaring at the ground before crossing her arms trying to hold back a flash of anger.

"Try me," Sango laughed thinking about that pervert of a husband she loved desperately. Rin tried to hide holding back shame and embarrassment. Kagome finally got her breath back and was ready to hear this messy situation.

"Well… I… he… we kind of…" Rin couldn't find a way to tell them her embarrassing but painfully emotional moment. She finally realized something… he still couldn't accept her.

"Spit it out," Sango said excitedly, "just tell us what happened we won't laugh!"

"I… he… we were about to. We were kissing and well things got a little passionate and he… pushed me off nearly tossing me. It was as if he couldn't get away from me soon enough. Both dropped their mouth and then looked at each other.

"I've never had a problem like that," Sango said looking to Kagome who shook her head in agreement.

"Neither have I… it's always been the opposite," Kagome smiled thinking of her beautiful hanyou, "Rin… I'm so sorry."

"What do I do now? Now that I… know how he really knows," Rin said twiddling her thumbs, "it was as if… he was doing it for me but changed his mind. I never put any pressure on him… I wish he had never tried."

"Sounds like he has some serious trust issues or something," Sango said un sure of the matter, "maybe… you should talk to him about it?"

"Are you mental!?" Rin asked standing up angrily, "I'd only make myself look more of a fool then I already am!"

"Rin?" a deep voice said followed by Shippo and Jaken's voice. Clearly they had found Sesshomaru and didn't know what they were forcing him to talk to Jaken's baby girl about. She swore for a moment Sesshomaru went red, "may I talk with Rin alone?"

"Sure," the girls said touching her arm before walking off and hiding with Shippo and Jaken to spy on them.

"Rin…" he began before Rin shook her head for him to not speak.

"I've never been anywhere as cold as you Sesshomaru," she said looking at him sadly, "for so long I cried for you. Every smile you fake is so condescending, I can't count all the scars you've made. You've never cared…"

"You cannot contradict me like this Rin. You do not know me…" he said anger rising in his voice, a tone that would scare anyone… but her. Shippo hid behind Sango and Jaken bit his nails but Kagome watched googly eyed.

"That is where you are wrong. I remember when you'd talk to me one on one; the world had never looked so good to me. You'd tell me about something, and I would count the colors in your eyes. You swore you'd never fall in love, and I laughed because I hoped you were wrong. I don't think it ever crossed your mind when you made a joke I faked a smile, but I know all your favorite things. You would look around innocently looking the truth; I thought a light should go on. I've had you memorized for so long. You see everything black and white, you didn't ever let anyone see you cry… and I never let anyone see me wishing you were mine. You would stand there and walk away, and I always wanted to say I am holding every breath for you. I know that you'd never tell anyone you play the heart, and I think you can see through everything but my heart. The first thought when I wake up is my god he is beautiful, so I would try to dress up and ask for a miracle. Yes I could tell you your favorite color is white, you love to argue, you have a half brother you would have killed, you have your fathers eyes, I could tell you a million things… but the one thing I would have told you if you had ever asked. Was that I love you. I love you because I know you… who you are, how you are, and what you are. Every detail, every stroke from the earths brush, every marking on your face, every long strand of your hair… and every swirl of gold and amber swirled together in your eyes," Rin said looking up at him her anger and coldness melting under his gentle but passionate gaze. He just watched her a moment trying to process all she had said. She was the light in his darkness, and the more that he got of her the stranger it felt… the better it felt. The more… he felt. There was so much a man could say, but he had to tell her…

"Rin I am sorry…" he said still looking at her expressionlessly, "I am still having a hard time with this. But the more I get of you the stranger this feels…"

"I… thought you might think that," Rin said looking down her eyes dropping like a rock dropped from a cliff ready to shatter preparing for the splat that comes at the end of a feel.

"Come on Sesshomaru," Sango said her fist clenched in desperation as they watched them stand under the falling sun.

"Oh…" Shippo said in anguish as he to clenched his fist. Sesshomaru looked at her unable to say anything. She was silent and he could hear his heart speaking in his head again.

'There you see her standing in front of you, she doesn't have much left to say. Kiss her! You want her… look at her you know we do. She wants you too… and it doesn't take a word to tell her just kiss the girl!' his heart screamed to him.

"It looks like the boy is too shy," Shippo shook his head, "he's going to mess up and make her leave again!"

'Now is your moment… you better do it soon no time will be better. She isn't going to say a word until you tell her… don't be scared go ahead and do it. Don't stop now, don't try and hide it now… do what your heart tells you… you want to kiss her. You want her,' his heart said blocking out his minds denial. His finger slid down underneath her chin lifting it up so he could look into her eyes.

"Remember what your stay at is me Sesshomaru," she said softly, "you were the one who once told me that forever felt like sitting in your head all alone. Well keep choosing to be without me. How much is real? There is so much to question. Remember it is just different from what you've seen, and I am looking at you through a glass. Because that is as close as you are willing to let me in Sesshomaru."

"I told you I had only so much to give," Sesshomaru said scared of her words. He had never truly felt fear like this. He did not like the feelings… but at the same time they were fresh and new. What could he say to her to make it clear he was trying, "I told you a head of time I couldn't give you what you wanted and still I tried."

"I know," Rin said looking down, "I guess there is… only one thing we can do…"

"Rin," he said lifting her face towards him once again smiling catching her off guard. What a rare scene she had just witnessed, "there is nothing we can do. We feel how we feel and so we will figure things out. You became the light on the dark side of me; love remains the reason that I am who I am. You remain my power, my pleasure, my pain, my weakness, and my strength. Rin…"

"Sesshomaru," Rin said looking up at him feeling something sting at her eyes, "thank you…"

"Thank you…" he whispered laying his forehead on hers and closing his eyes tired of fighting. Kagome began to think of something as she smiled teary-eyed remembering how her and Inuyasha were. Once Rin was by herself Kagome pulled her aside and smiled.

"Ka…gome?" Rin asked as Kagome handed her a couple of magazines. Kagome smiled releasing her old possessions to Rin.

"I don't need these anymore, they are magazines shipped to where I really live from America. A giant place that my place sends our technology and stuff too. It is complicating to explain so you know how to read I taught you… so read these they should give you some good seducing ideas. I think the problem is he is scared… because he is in love. With you of course, but the point is that he needs a little persuasion. He is afraid of ruining things," Kagome said smiling before returning to her hubby's warm arms. Inuyasha laid his head on Kagome's head happily as they watched the stars twinkle. Rin sat down and opened the funny feeling paper and began to read. A funny face struck her face as she read some of the things it said. She took her hand and began kissing it practicing the techniques it said to use. Sesshomaru walked in watching her like she was weird. She stopped and looked up at him quickly tossing the book behind her and moving her hand down. Her face turned pink with embarrassment.

"What… were you doing?" he asked with curiosity as he sat down in front of her. She swallowed before getting ballsy.

"Why did you throw me off of you when we started kissing… and stuff," Rin said blushing more catching Sesshomaru off guard. His eyes grew larger before swallowing un comfortably.

Authroste note: IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!

Like I said before about my Internet… but I am going to conintue writing like this. But I am going to make the next few chapters based on the three couples. Sesshomaru and Rin, Kagome and Inuyasha, and Snago and Miroku. I will make it on their thoughts and point of view. And thank you for the ideas and help! Keep them coming! Well atleast the comments!


	12. 11: A fluffy moment in time

Chapter 11: A fluffy moment in time

Authors note: FLUFF GALORE! Rin and Sesshomaru have had fluffy moments… but they always tend to end up in a fight so I will make this a little fluffier! Then again I am sorry for the wait I haven't been able to upload my story! I had to take Arizonabay's idea on the export and then pasting it into that thingyamjig! Thank you all!

Sesshomaru walked beside Rin as they headed back for the castle to come up with a game plan. He couldn't wait to lie down and relax in a bed and pull Rin closely. An image that made him blush uncomfortably ran through his mind about Rin. Inuyasha smirked remembering those times and being so confused. He remembered battling his feelings with his one true love Kagome. There was no price that he didn't pay, no price that Sesshomaru wouldn't have to pay just to be with his human girl. For a moment he actually felt sympathetic towards his older brother, perhaps even thought he should talk to him. Quickly Inuyasha sneered it off and let Kagome's hand slip into his hand. For a while he was too afraid to show the world their affection but after years of practice he was use to it.

Sesshomaru sighed into the breeze wondering how long he'd have to worry whether they would be torn apart by this new threat. He wondered what had happened to the old women, and how did she know they would all end up together? He swallowed trying to hide another in appropriate thought, which made Inuyasha laugh. Everyone looked to him. Rin looked to the one she loved as she secretly slipped her hand into his careful to not make it obvious to the others knowing he had not yet fully accepted her. Rin could feel something different… something pushing her to grow up. When they set up a camp she sat down on her bed looking at the magazine. She flipped through it looking at all the interesting things in it. Kagome and Sango walked in smiling as Rin quickly got rid and slammed the magazine into the ground.

"I don't understand this stuff Kagome," Rin said feeling awkward. Kagome smiled before picking up the book and flipping through it.

"Here your not ready for the other stuff… just work with this," Kagome said marking a page and handing it to Rin. Rin swallowed nervously. Rin looked at it nervously, before realizing perhaps she might not be ready to go to that level, "I know what you are thinking."

"Really?" Rin asked innocently. Though she had grown so much and grew a stubborn mind she was still so sweet and so innocent. But if she became Sesshomaru's mate… that would all change and everyone except for Rin knew that.

"I use to wonder if I was ready to become Inuyasha's mate," Kagome said as she sat beside Rin, "right now you need to make a decision. Are you willing to give all of you for Sesshomaru? To be the mate of a youkai is not as glamorous as it might seem. As well… there are a lot of sacrifices. Or you can walk away and tell him you aren't ready for this yes. But if you are able to handle it… in all of its scariness try one of these things to get his attention."

"Erm… uh… alright," Rin said looking down, "I don't want to lose him. I… gue… guess I will have to try to do whatever. There are certain things I am ready for and being his mate is one of them, but there are other things in that territory that Jaken has explained about them and lord Sesshomaru… that do frighten me. Like the way they mark… it sounds painful. And having kids… I want kids but I don't. The more I feel I will never have one the more I want one, but he would never accept having a hanyou child."

"Rin then you need to go and find out where he is at with things," Sango said sitting on her knees and taking the young girls hands in her own, "you are almost a woman. There will be expectations."

"I… know," Rin said looking down at the magazine.

"I don't mean that Rin. Do what you feel is right but Kagome is right in that area. He will eventually expect it of you, which is why he is rejecting you because he doesn't want to put you in that situation. He thinks that if he makes the moves then you'll feel pressured into doing it so you won't lose him which would be true," Sango said comfortingly. Rin smiled at her thankfully.

"Thank you… I guess I will just see how it goes," Rin said throwing the magazine down and jumping up. She searched around the camp but did not find Sesshomaru. The breeze tickled her skin as it whispered to her making her feel the urge to look to a pathway. She curiously walked it find it led to a small clearing where the stars looked like they were being bunched together at the roof of the tall pine trees. Sesshomaru sat with his legs crossed deep in concentration. The wind stirred around her lifting her scent and scattering it in all direction including Sesshomaru's. He let a smile escape before hiding it.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru said with such monotone Rin thought she was in trouble. Rin stepped forward and stood behind him waiting for his command.

"Yes my lord? Is there something you wish of me?" Rin said hopeful he would get romantic but no such luck.

"Sit down Rin," he said not looking at her. Rin watched as the breeze lifted his long flowing beautiful blonde hair. Her long black hair was pulled back but danced around as she sat down, "…hmm."

"What?" Rin asked sitting straight up as she crossed her arms feeling cold.

"Rin…?" he began but stopped himself as he noticed her shivering, "…are you cold?"

"Yes a little," Rin said swallowing afraid he would change his mind about her.

"You… could scoot closer, if you want," Sesshomaru said unsure how to say it. Rin smiled as she scooted closer and snuggled into the warmth of his armpit and the fur thing draped over them.

"Thank you," she said closing her hand as she let her hand slip onto his chest. His jaw muscles tensed as he felt her hand gently glide up his chest onto his shoulder.

"Rin…" he said his eyes closing as he wanted so bad to pull her in tight. Rin looked up at him as he opened his eyes and looked down at her with glowing amber eyes. A small smile threatened to spread like a wild fire. Her hand slipped onto his cheek as she guided his face to hers. Such soft gentle kisses he portrayed onto her lips. He felt her push up against him as her arm wrapped around his neck. His arm slipped around her waist pulling him closer to her. He couldn't help but lose control, his other arm grabbed her other side moving her in front of him… and like that Rin was NOT cold. He felt as their kisses got more passionate and he could feel an ache for her. His hand ran up her thigh sending a fluttering feeling in her stomach that made her smile, and she could feel him smile too. Her kisses moved from his lips to his cheek and down to his neck. He closed his eye feeling the rush as he kissed his neck as her hand slid up the back of his neck. One second of thought hit him.

'Wow… where did she learn this?' he thought leaning into her as he felt her front shift up and she rubbed against him, 'oh no… what… am I doing?'

'This… is it,' she thought as she went to kiss him again but he moved this time not throwing her off but picking her up and setting her away from him, "Ses… Sesshomaru?"

"Stay over there for just a moment," Sesshomaru said breathing heavily as he tried to control the racing in his heart. He was trying to gain control of his breathing again as he tried to let himself 'cool off' for a moment.

"Sesshomaru?" she asked climbing onto her knees before he threw his hand up in warning.

"Stay there!" he yelled before swallowing. He looked over to her before looking away, this feeling was so awkward, 'this time she started it. I almost lost control of myself.'

"Sesshomaru," she said softly and frightened. He could hear the shakiness in her voice. She set a fire in him whenever she was around, a fire only she could burn out.

"You shouldn't be afraid of me… ever," Sesshomaru said looking at her with a look that both showed love and annoyance, "I would never hurt you."

"I know," she said her body relaxing. She sighed before looked down, "I don't get it…"

"Then perhaps your not suppose to understand," Sesshomaru said watching her pull some grass from the nights ground. She loved the night; it was just more romantic somehow. Rin looked up at him. He stared at her never breaking his words.

"Why do you do this every time? Why don't you accept me?" Rin asked normally trying to keep her cool as the crickets chirped and the wind made the grass whistle.

"I don't believe that anyone feels the way I do about you. And… there are many things I would like to say to you but don't know how," Sesshomaru said looking at her speaking in the same tone she was use to.

"Then say them Sesshomaru I am here. I keep reaching for you and you keep turning your back on me. Help me understand why you keep rejecting me?" Rin asked looking at him with all the beauty that world could possibly hold.

"I… I've been thinking maybe your going to be the one that saves me Rin. After all… you've become my wall. So just maybe if I can keep you around enough… you'll finally see this heart of mine," he said looking at her his eyes standing out in the cold nights darkness. Rin swallowed as she looked at him.

"Sesshomaru. While your outside looking in, describing what you see… remember what your staring at is me. And I feel like your forcing me to look at your through a glass. Let me out Sesshomaru. I need to know how much is real? So much to question I suppose," she said crossing her arms as she looked at him, "before you tell yourself this is just a different scene. Remember its just different then from what you've seen."

"What does that mean?" he asked angry that SHE was lecturing him.

"It means that just because you haven't done this before, just because your feelings are foreign to you doesn't mean that it is different and should be alienated. Because to me this scene hasn't changed… I've always loved you. I've always been yours," Rin said glaring at him. He smiled at her happy to hear such encouraging words.

"Rin," he said holding out his hand for her to take. She hesitated before crawling over to him and taking his hand. For a moment they gazed into each other's eyes, "I am having a hard time trusting my heart. I want to protect you from this world, and if anyone were to know I had claimed you it would ruin our chances at being together in the future. But do not misjudge my minds doing as my hearts wishes, my heart beats for you Rin… but still I do not know how to trust it. We are still so different Rin…"

"Sesshomaru… put your faith into what you most believe in. Even though we are from two different worlds we are from the same family. Trust your heart; let faith decide to guide these lives we see. I need you, and a new life is waiting for us. Though you have long ears and beautiful eyes that do not match mine… I do not see any stranger here. Right here I am calling for you… two different people but at the same time so alike. I love you. I love you and you have to know it," she said looking at him feeling his hand squeeze around hers. She blinked innocently as he felt a smile slowly drift across his beautiful face.

"Rin… there is so much a man can tell you so much he can say… you remain my power my pleasure my strength. Won't you tell me if this is right? I feel like I am taking away the chance of giving you a normal life still but the more I get of you the harder it becomes to bare the thought of giving you away," Sesshomaru said squeezing his eyes shut. Rin smiled as she looked at him.

"Then don't give me up," she said looking at him with a smile. She laughed before saying, "I beg you to not let me go! Keep me prisoner! Chain me to you! You can keep me until the day we die!"

"Why?" he smiled big at her beautiful life.

"The beat of my heart," she said smiling at him before looking down as she played with a lock of his hair, "I'm thinking about letting it out. I want to give out and I want you. Looking around I finally has found the rhythm of love the feeling of sound. It is making a change, the feeling is stranger and it is right in my range. I won't worry about anything else because every morning I will be waking up to the beat of my heart. I'm up from my down and turn it around; I am making it back and taking a stance. I won't miss a chance I want you to see that I love you. I want you to know that I will always be true… to the beat of my heart and my heart beats for you. But I am feeling like the beat of my heart is tearing us apart from the things I desire. So I am just giving you me all of me. I am now your problem."

"What a generous offer," he said smiling down at her as his arm wrapped around her, "are you sure you want to make such a generous offer?"

"Yeah," she said smiling up at him. He bent down to kiss her. This time she did not push it, which he was thankful for. He gently stroked her face before trailing a couple kisses from her cheek to the top of her forehead, "this could be it. I know I am in love. It is love this time. It just seems to fit I am so in love and this love is mine. I can see you with me when I am old; all of our lonely nights are finally over. You are the one I am in love with, now life can finally begin for me. I can see the two of us together, and I always knew I would be with you forever. Love couldn't be any better! When you kiss me… oh when you kiss me. Your lips taste like freedom, and your eyes project my freedom in this world of constraint. Because the world just goes away when you're with me Sesshomaru. I am yours and so is my heart."

"In no more then eight words you just took the weight of the world off my shoulder," Sesshomaru said gently playing with her hair slowly giving her a little more of him, "so will you do me a favor?"

"Anything you ask of," Rin said looking up at him with a smile. Sesshomaru did not smile back making her look at him with confusion.

"Let's wait awhile before making any hasty decisions because we cannot afford to make a mistake," he said slightly killing that moment. Rin shrunk down at the words 'a mistake' and he realized he said something wrong, "Rin I just…"

"No please don't…" Rin said shaking her head no, "do not say anything else please. There are bridges that we cannot see, some cross-troubled waters and some don't go anywhere. Some you wouldn't step on if you were trying to save your heart, one comes with a keeper when it is time. Some aren't meant to last forever and some are made of stone, some are meant to cross together, and some you go alone. Please don't damage ours anymore…"

"Rin I am sorry. I didn't mean it like that and I ask you to forgive me. This is a heavy load we carry Rin and I am sorry if I keep lighting our bridge on fire," he said looking at her desperately, "I didn't mean to set our bridge on fire."

"I can see you standing on the other side, so here I go… and it is a heavy road but I have crossed some bridges in my time as I am sure you have. But though you set fire to our bridge you cannot burn it down," she said smiling at him. He smiled at her and leaning his forehead on hers. He closed his eyes, as he smelled her sweet scent.

"I am sorry I am still new at this Rin. I've never loved a human before," he said making her sigh but she didn't move. She knew with him she'd have to give him time and understanding.

"And I have never loved anyone like I love you," Rin said softly as a tear fell from her eye. He smelt the salt in her tear but didn't want to bring it up, 'he still doesn't see me as anything except the human girl he loves.'

'I love her… I love Rin. So why do I keep hurting her? She is the woman I love… the only woman I will ever love,' he thought as he gently stroked her face praying no one was watching. It was so peaceful sitting there like that. He lay down as she followed pursuit. Her head gently rested on his chest as he wrapped them with his huge fur already wrapped around him, "you wear me out you know."

"Hmmm?" she said listening to the rising of his breaths and the thumping of his heart.

"What are you thinking about?" he asked as his hand gently ran through her long silky hair that he had pulled out of the ponytail so he could play with it.

"How you could think we are so different," she said softly her hand gently resting on his broad well-formed chest. His hand large hand fell on top of her small hand.

"Rin we are different," he sighed as he kissed the top of her head, "but that doesn't change my love for you."

"Your heart beats like mine," she said into his chest making his eyebrows burrow, "you breathe like me, your skin is soft like mine, you see the same things I do…"

"Rin…" he said in shock of her words so simple yet so meaningful, "I never thought about it like that. Only you are wrong on one thing Rin. We do not see all the same things… being me I get to see something amazing that you don't."

"What?" Rin asked looking up at him as he chin buried into his chest, "what do you get to see that I don't get to?"

"I get to see the most amazing thing… you," he said looking at her, "every line on your face every curve on your body… every smile that those beautiful lips of yours curve into."

"Sesshomaru," she said smiling as she looked up at him. She laid her head back down as he wrapped his arms around her again. Perhaps that was much better the way they had it. Right there him and her, "even if I die tomorrow Sesshomaru this moment would make it okay."

"No it wouldn't don't say that," he said sitting up making her nearly roll off. He caught her lifting her to eye level, "don't talk that way. We might have taken the long way Rin but we finally got here. They said we'd never make it but look we are here together going strong. Because Rin you are the one I run to, the one I BELONG TO, the one I love, the only one I dream of… and your going to be the one I kiss goodnight for many years to come. We'll beat the odds together Rin."

"I know silly!" Rin laughed hugging him making him looked shock, "I just wanted to tell you how much this moment means to me!"

"Rin, are, you… crying?" Sesshomaru asked as his arms curled around her. She shook her head no as a loud sob came from her, "what is wrong Rin?"

"I fear you will find a new girl who your dreams are made of. Without you it aint worth living!" she cried hard into his chest making swallow uncomfortably. He patted her on the back not sure how to comfort her, "Sesshomaru… sometimes I wake up crying at night, and sometimes I scream out your name because you're my hero. Sesshomaru I would dance if you asked me to dance, I would run and never look back. I would cry if I saw you crying… I would tremble if you touched my lips. I would laugh and I would die for you because you're the one I love."

"Rin I will stand by you forever," he said as he laid his hand on her face and gently kissed her lips, "now let me try and kiss away the pain."

"You just did," she said once his lips left hers. He smiled down at her before she pushed him down and laid her head on his chest and softly fell asleep to him playing with her hair. She smiled as his finger gently traced her cheek. She snuggled closer to him wondering how long that would last. Slowly she fell asleep, and soon the sound of soft snores could be heard from both of them.

The night slowly buzzed away and morning began with the sound of crickets and chirping birds. Shippo walked around calling out for his two friends. He spotted the two sleeping together peacefully. His eyes nearly bulged out of his head as he hid behind a tree and snickered. Sesshomaru opened his eyes stretching before remembering Rin was there with him and it wasn't a dream. He smiled as he snuggled back up to her; she turned in his arms before letting out a soft peaceful breath. Neither Sesshomaru nor Shippo knew that someone else had been spying… someone also in love with Rin. Kohaku swallowed in angst. Rin woke up and smiled as he moved some hair from her face. He kissed her nose before kissing her lips. Her hand gently stroked his long flowing hair t hat covered her body. He looked down at her gently stroking her cheek not knowing someone was watching the show of affection. Kohaku swallowed again before taking off running as far away as he could get. Sesshomaru's head snapped in the direction of an accidental laugh. Shippo covered his mouth before giggling some more. Sesshomaru was about to jump up to squash the squirt but Rin grabbed him.

"Shippo run!" Rin yelled hanging onto Sesshomaru with a death grip. Shippo bolted growing a little more with each passing day. Sesshomaru looked down at her angrily.

"Why'd you stop me?" he asked with irritation in his voice. Rin just smiled at him.

"Because he is a friend of mine," she said as he quickly tried to go after the almost teenage youkai, "and because I knew that would make him go away so I could have you to myself."

"Really?" he asked lifting an eyebrow at her. She shook her head yes letting those beautiful long black strands of hair. Rin sighed as she lay in his arms. He realized Shippo would set the camp in an uproar and they'd catch him. He wasn't yet ready to let the world see who he loved, "we should go back."

"Huh?" she said as he quickly kissed her and then stood up. She sighed knowing exactly why he had done that. She let him help her up and followed him silently. She was tired of arguing… she was tired of being angry and caring. The camp was already packed and ready to go when they walked in both quiet and blushing.

--

Kohaku breathed heavily as he ran feeling beads of sweat drip down. He had to run as far as he could, he had to get out of there. He had to put as much distance as he could between them. He stopped taking deep breaths nervously. He clenched his heart hating the pain he was feeling. A rush of wind blew past him startling him.

"Kohaku?" a voice said behind him making him jump. Kohaku pulled out his weapon ready to defend himself, "there is no need for weapons here."

"Who are you?" Kohaku asked as a boy with long blonde hair walked out of the mist. He looked almost identical to Sesshomaru, "Sess…homaru?"

"Not exactly," the boy said with the same cold face that Sesshomaru usually held, "I have come to ask of your help."

"Who… who are you?" Kohaku asked with curiousness. The boy grinned before bowing.

"I am… Yuka," the son of Naraku lied with such ease that Kohaku believed him, "I have come to set revenge against Sesshomaru. He destroyed my village with the single flick of his hand. My family all destroyed by him. If you help me you may have anything of his you wish… title, money… anything."

"What do you want ME to do?" Kohaku asked putting away his weapon. "Yuka what could I possibly bring to you that you don't already have?"

"Help, an insider. I need help to get close to him so I can take him out. It will be hard but I need a spy," Yuka said seriousness written over his plain face. That was one of the few things that distinguished him from Sesshomaru. Kohaku bit his lip deep in thought. It took him a moment.

"If I do it… how will I keep in contact with you?" Kohaku asked with curiousness as the boy handed him a mirror stumping Kohaku.

"Just repeat the name I told you into it and then cover it with your breath and we can communicate. You must tell me locations, plans, history, ways to bring him down… as well help yourself," Yuka said as Kohaku looked at the mirror. He looked up at Yuka with a look of hatred in his eyes.

"Done," Kohaku said heatedly, "with your help I can bring that filthy Youkai down and get back my woman."

Authors note: I hope you enjoyed it! I enjoyed this I just haven't had time not to mention Fanfiction has been giving me hell on putting my stories up! Sorry it took me so long you guys! I hope this wasn't a poor quality chapter… there was a lot of Fluff.


	13. 12: Conflict

Chapter 12: Conflict 

Authors note: Sorry if there are a lot of spelling errors my computer is being a douche and won't correct anything. And not getting very many grammar classes I have a hard time catch those darn small but easy to look over mistakes. OH and there will be a important announcement from a character in the story so pay attention **winks**.

**Rin and Sesshomaru**

Rin lay on her bed sighing as she began to think about Sesshomaru. She rolled over tired of wondering about him all the time. She smiled thinking about how much closer they had become in five days. He was so cute! She wanted to be with him every second of the day. She wished he was there with her at that moment. She looked at her hands, the hands that Sesshomaru chose to secretly hold.

--

Sesshomaru sighed looking at the roof of the tent thinking about Rin. Something just wasn't right how was he falling so hard? Was it possible or just a darn bloodline thing? It didn't matter his heart belonged to her. He smiled as a thought came to his mind of her, he thought of the first moment he touched her lips. He would die for her. HE'D DIE FOR HER?! Oh wow! He smiled at the thought closing his eyes he hated being away from her for more then just a second.

'I never knew that this could be this hard; I never thought that I could think this much. But these days I am all turned around,' he thought sighing, 'there is only one thing I am sure right now. I should be sleeping instead of keeping these late hours I've been keeping. I've been pacing and retracing every step of her move, even though this feels so right and I am so happy… I should be sleeping instead of thinking about her,' he thought thinking about all the times he made her laugh, 'I never did think I was funny at all… that was until I went and made her laugh. I never did like a clingy girl, but she is and I like it! Why can't I stop thinking about her smile? It looks as if… I might be up for awhile,' he thought smiling before standing up and walking out of the tent. He snuck into her tent making her bolt up.

"Sesshomaru?" she asked looking at him scratching his head, "you couldn't sleep either?"

"No… I've been pacing and retracing and it has me frustrated. After such a little time Rin and a couple great kisses… it is way too soon to be obsessing like this. But yet I obsess about you! I can't get you out of my head… I feel itchy when you're not near and I don't like it," he said sitting crisscrossed in front of her. He reached out touching her face; "I want to sleep with you tonight. Is there any room."

"Of course Sesshomaru," she said making room for her love as he laid down beside her gently kissing her before taking her hand in his and laying both his hand and hers under his head and closing his eyes.

"Now I can sleep," he said softly letting out a breath that tickled her face, "good night Rin."

"Good night Sesshomaru," she said smiling so big she thought he would be able to see it with his eyes closed. She closed her eyes while snuggling into his chest getting closer to him.

**Kagome and Inuyasha **

Kagome sat by the fire poking at it with curiosity. She sighed in the cold night feeling the fresh crispness try to out do the heat from the colorful fire. She felt someone walk up behind her. She turned and looked at her handsome hanyou. He sat down besides her silently saying nothing. Kagome went back to poking at the fire. Inuyasha sighed making Kagome look over at him and smile. He did not smile back.

"You seem in distress," Kagome said taking Inuyasha's hand. He looked at her and then looked away deep in thought.

"I just never thought I'd be traveling with Sesshomaru. I never thought he'd take on a human girl. Things just don't seem right," Inuyasha said as he looked at the fire, "and that boy. He looked like…"

"Sesshomaru?" Kagome finished his sentence. Inuyasha looked over to her and nodded, "are you worried Inuyasha?"

"Keh! Only for your safety," he lied as he felt Kagome's skin shiver from a gust of icy wind, "winter is coming soon. You should go into our tent Kagome."

"I want to stay out here with you," Kagome said looking at him. He smiled a charming smile only she got to see, "I love you Inuyasha."

"I… love you too Kagome," he was always skeptical of saying those words especially when he meant them. She sighed and leaned over onto his shoulder, "I think Rin is letting her feelings go a little too fast. I did the same time which made it longer for us to get together I suppose."

"No… it took us so long because I wasn't ready to be aware of the signs Kagome," he said hating to admit it was his fault. But because he loved her he wouldn't let her believe it was her fault, "I think it is Sesshomaru who isn't rushing it fast enough. Sometimes I want to talk to him…"

"Then why don't you?" Kagome said quickly getting off his shoulder to look him in the eyes, "talk to him Inuyasha be a brother you guys never talk and when you do they are threats."

"Keh! NEVER!" Inuyasha turned away and crossed his arms. Why was he so stubborn?!

"Sesshomaru is your brother like it or not. I cannot talk to him as intimately as you can," Kagome said placing her hand on his shoulder.

"That sounds stupid Kagome," Inuyasha said still not looking at her. Kagome rolled her eyes, "don't get mad Kagome! Don't…"

"Sit!" she yelled making him fling into the ground painfully. His eye twitched as he sat face down in the ground. Kagome crossed her arms, "I'll do it again unless you talk to your brother.

"F…fine," Inuyasha said trying to peel himself from the ground, "how could a man be a man in a relationship when is woman told him to sit all the time. He quickly sat up angrily giving her a scolding look.

"You asked for it Inuyasha," Kagome shrugged with a small smile. She loved having those powers over him.

"When we get married Kagome your no longer to do that!" Inuyasha barked at her with irritation. Kagome smiled.

"Fine… but we aren't married yet," Kagome said standing up and walking to the tent leaving Inuyasha with a nervous look.

**Sango and Miroku**

Miroku kissed down Sango's neck as she smiled as he started to kiss her. But for some reason she wasn't as into it as usual. This frustrated Miroku because he wanted it SOOO badly. She just giggled trying to be quiet not to wake the others. The tent made a whistling noise from the wind as Miroku's hand slid up her thigh slowly lifting her kimono up. But she wasn't going with the flow of things frustrating him more.

"Sango?" he asked in-between kisses. Her hand pushed his chest up so she could look him in the eyes.

"I need to talk to you," Sango said looking up at the man she so desperately loved. Miroku nodded as he held his posture above her.

"What is it Sango?" his face grew worried as tears flung from his wife's eyes. He quickly sat up pulling Sango with him.

"I'm pregnant!" she wailed making his face droop in surprise.

"You… you mean we are…" he couldn't say but then a giant smile came on his face, "we are having a kid!"

"Shhh!" Sango yelled smacking him, "let's not yet let the others know. They will tell us to return to the village and not fight and they need our help Miroku."

"You should go back Sango it is too dangerous you could jeopardize their lives as well as yours," he said taking her face in his manly hands. She shook her head no.

"I won't go or be anywhere without you. They need us both of us, at least until I am around five months along and then I will consider going into hiding," she said looking at him gloomily, "this ruins everything."

"This ruins nothing it makes us stronger," Miroku said smiling at her. She looked up at him with googly and loving eyes.

"Will you lay with my tonight?" Sango asked as she lay down. He nodded his head yes as he lay down beside her. They stared each other in the eyes until she fell asleep. Miroku sighed as he looked at the love of his life.

'I wonder whether we'll have a boy or a girl? I wonder what we will name them. I wonder if I will die before they are born,' he thought sadly as he watched her sleep peacefully, 'will I be a good man for her? Will I be a good father and husband? I want to be a good man, a faithful man to her as long as I live. I love her so much. Sango…'

**Rin and Sesshomaru **

The morning brought a bright sun chasing away the skin tingling frost of the night. Rin stretched as she smiled seeing Sesshomaru had positioned himself so his head was on her breast. She laid her hand on his head stroking his hair as her imagination went wild with ideas of where they would be in a couple of years. Would his love ever change? Sesshomaru stirred a moment. She smiled as he woke up. He stretched before realizing where his head was out. He quickly sat up looking around.

"Hmmm," he said before looking to her, "did you sleep alright?"

'That cold tone again,' she thought sighing, "I slept fine…"

"Good we should go then," he said standing up and leaving to pack his stuff. She sighed before standing up and putting her stuff in the bag and then pulling apart her tent. They would be at the castle in a days walk or so. Why was he acting like that again? She walked to meet with the others as Sango and Miroku held hands. Kagome grabbed Inuyasha's hand as they began walking. Shippo bounced around looking for Kohaku.

"Sango?" Shippo asked as he jumped on her shoulder growing to big to do that, "where is Kohaku?"

"I don't know he probably went back to the castle," she shrugged. She looked left and right with her Hiraikotsu hanging on her back as she was dressed in her exterminator clothes. Sango sighed knowing her brother was strong now and could defend himself. She looked back in the direction to where the dirt road they traveled on led towards. Rin looked at Sesshomaru walking beside her, he did not look at her. Why was his cold demeanor back? Rin sighed making Sesshomaru look to her.

"Rin?" he asked with his deep voice. Rin looked to him wanting to keep his attention, "why'd you sigh?"

"What? Oh… I'm tired," she lied looking away and staring off into the horizon. She too noticed Kohaku's disappearance, "where is Kohaku Sango?"

"I do not know I think he headed back to the castle," Sango said feeling her stomach grumble making Miroku look to her stomach and smile. She smiled at him before squeazing his hand.

"Why does it matter?" Sesshomaru said with jealousness that made Inuyasha laugh. Sesshomaru shot back a look that was a warning, "what are you laugh at hanyou?"

"Inuyasha no," Kagome said grabbing his arm. Inuyasha looked to her and swallowed. He let go of his sword.

"Jealous aye?" Inuyasha smirked making Sesshomaru's eyes glow.

"Not in the least bit," Sesshomaru said before looking forward distancing himself from Rin a little. He wasn't yet ready for the world to see them.

"So Sesshomaru? Was that you I saw walking out of Rin's tent this morning?" Miroku laughed making Sango glare at him and Sesshomaru look to the side.

"I was helping her pack," Sesshomaru said with such ease everyone nearly believed it… everyone except Shippo. Rin looked at the ground with watery eyes, would this be the way she'd live for ages. Like she was worth nothing. She slowed down and walked by herself while slouching. For hours they walked until the castle was close by. Sesshomaru looked back at Rin who looked off to the setting sun. They had been walking all day and she was tired, thirsty, and hungry. Rin felt like perhaps he thought she was a mistake. Sesshomaru slowly thought to himself ways of breaking into her room so they could sleep the night away together. But little did he know Rin was thinking of ways to avoid; now she had become ashamed to say she was in love with him. Her eyes got teary and pain stricken. Finally they walked up the steps to his castle. Jaken ran out jumping on his daughter. Rin smiled a fake smile that warmed up her father's heart. Jaken began to shower her with food and hugs. Sesshomaru tried to hold back a smile; she had always made good impacts on people… even his servant's once icy heart. The heart he had turned against humans to follow his own human hating heart, 'the irony,' he thought as he watched them and then slowly walked past the golden haired youkai watching him with dreamy eyes. Her face grew an angry look as she watched him watch the human girl being praised.

"Where is Kohaku?" Rin asked Jaken who shrugged, "so he isn't here?"

"No Rin my child why?" Jaken asked looking at her, "Wasn't he with you?"

"Yeah… he was," she thought before turning around this time running to find Sango. Her, Miroku, Kagome, and Inuyasha were all having a meeting in town. She grabbed her bag and started to walk for the door when Sesshomaru saw her.

"Rin?" he asked telling the servant he had ordered to leave with a simple wave of his hand, "where are you going?"

"To town," Rin said grabbing the door handle.

"Why? Where are the others?" Sesshomaru asked walking down the stairs making Rin watch him in aw before shaking it off.

"In town," she said still looking at him. His tone had lightened when he heard they weren't there.

"Then why not stay here with me instead of going to the town Rin?" he asked standing in front of her.

"Now you want…" she sighed and gave up, "I am going to look for Kohaku."

"No your not," he said jealousy rolling through his amber eyes.

"Excuse me?" she asked looking astonished.

"I forbid your to look for him," Sesshomaru said angry she would even consider looking for the boy who was openly in love with her. He grabbed her wrist so she couldn't escape the conversation. She yanked her wrist from his group ignoring the pain.

"How dare you tell me what to do now after you so bluntly denied my in front of my friends," she said storming out of the door walking to town. He sighed realizing that she was angry with him.

'She is just TRYING to make me jealous,' he though nervously before looking out the door at the girl running to town, 'she'll be back soon.'

--

A couple hours later and the group returned. Night had covered the sky and darkened the land. Sesshomaru was sitting in a large room full of furniture nervously. He stood up when he heard the door open and shut. He walked out to see if it was Rin but instead of it being Rin it was the group… without Rin.

"Sesshomaru?" Kagome asked when he appeared in the doorway. The rest of them looked in his direction.

"Where is Rin?" Sesshomaru asked with a growl in his throat. Inuyasha looked to the others as the others shrugged.

"Did you lose your human?" Inuyasha laughed not realizing the seriousness, "perhaps she just got tired of you."

"Inuyasha SIT!" Kagome said for his own protection at the look in Sesshomaru's eyes. He grabbed his sheath and sword and walked out of the castle, "look what you did Inuyasha!"

"Me?" he said his face buried in the floor. Sango smiled before turning to follow. Kirara followed behind her transforming. Miroku jumped up behind her.

--

Rin felt the chill of night prick at her sensitive skin. She gripped the sword around her waist tightly hoping she hadn't forgotten how to use one, it had been so long since she had finished her practicing. She heard something in the distance against the sound of crickets. The sound made even the crickets shut up with fear. Rin quickly hid behind a tree as three-wolf youkai licked the blood off their lips. Rin gasped remembering the horrible night she had been killed. This was her chance at getting revenge. She grabbed her bow and an arrow. She quickly placed the arrow in place and jumped out shooting one of them. They looked at their fellow companion as he fell down with an arrow in the forehead. She hadn't realized they were so close. She swallowed reaching for another arrow but realizing they were already almost there in front of her. She quickly turned in run realizing the arrows were spilling.

She breathed heavily into the night as her ponytail came out of her head letting her black hair loose. She felt something scratch into her back as the wolf had missed grabbing her and instead scratched her. She ducked under the tree and the wolf's hit it knocking into it and losing some feet. Rin quickly climbed over a log and ducked down panting exhaustedly. The adrenalin in her was pounding and her heart racing as the wolf youkai turned into their demon form leaping over the huge log. They turned around smelling her scent. She covered her face ready to feel the ripping of flesh when something jumped down in front of her taking the blow. Rin opened her eye and saw a flash of brown and some black hair.

"How dare you," a familiar voice said making her shiver. The two wolves's looked at him with hatred, "this is what you've become? I told you if I ever saw your faces again I tare them off your bodies."

"It is you who will die Koga," the wolf said before leaping at him. With the slash of his claw Koga ripped that wolf to shreds, Blood splattered everywhere and all over Rin. The other one howled before running off. Koga turned around to look at Rin who was breathing heavily. He started walking to her.

"Please I swear I'll do anything just don't kill me," Rin said pushing herself against the log with terror filled eyes.

"You seem familiar," he said bending down to look at her closely, "you smell familiar. You do not have to fear me girl I will not harm you. I no longer eat humans."

"Tha…thank you for saving me," she said as he stood up and held a hand out to help her up, "who are you?"

"You still shake?" Koga said looking her over, "you… you smell like that girl traveling with that mutt's older brother Sesshomaru."

"That would be me," she said looking at him with very little trust, "my name is Rin."

"Hmmm… you do not look the same at all," he said looking her over, "why are you not with dog breaths older brother?"

"I came to find Kohaku… I am angry with Sesshomaru," she said as he stopped looking her over, "you never did tell me who you are and… oh."

"What?" he asked looking at her. She kept looking at him before she started laughing, "what!"

"Your Koga the leader of wolf clan. The one who loved Kagome," Rin said with a smile, "did you stop coming around because she is Inuyasha's mate?"

"That would do it wouldn't it?" Koga said crossing his arms and looking into the sky, "one day she will see she loved me all along and made a mistake."

"I don't think so," Rin said smiling making him point at her and nearly stop yelling until something dropped between them. Sesshomaru pulled out his sword ready to fight for Rin.

"Get away from her!" Sesshomaru yelled threateningly.

"A little barbarianish isn't he? No wonder you don't want to be around him," Koga said looking at Rin who was standing behind Sesshomaru, "I don't think she needs your help."

"How dare you!" he yelled about ready to release an attack when Rin grabbed his arm and stopped him, "Rin let go!"

"NO!" She yelled moving between him and Koga. He looked at her in shock as he saw the blood covering her.

"He did this to you and still you stand between us!" Sesshomaru yelled in anger.

"He saved me!" Rin yelled getting an angry look on her face as she clenched her fist.

"I saved you from what he did to you so long ago!" he yelled putting away his sword and turning to walk away, "why don't you just go with him…"

"What?" Rin asked her eyes nearly bulging out as she watched Sesshomaru walk away from her. Did he really not love her enough to stay and fight for her?

"Alright lets go," Koga said sighing at the irritation, "that family is fully of wimpy as demons."

"Huh?" Rin asked looking back at Koga. He looked to her and gave her a face that said 'stop sitting there and move it.'

"He just told you he no longer wants you around. Let me make up what we did to you," he said waiting for her to catch up, "I will help you find your friend. Man why do you women choose the wrong guy?"

"Huh?" she asked looking at him still hurt by Sesshomaru's total dismissal to her. Koga just smirked before leading the way trying to catch onto any scent he could of Kohaku's. Rin looked at the man standing beside her.

--

Sango saw Sesshomaru walking bellow them in the forest. Kirara dropped down and landed in front of the dog demon. Sesshomaru just looked at them with anger covering up the hurt and hatred for that meddling wolf demon. Inuyasha let Kagome climb off before looking around for Rin.

"Why aren't you still looking for Rin?" Kagome asked with anger at the plain look on his face as he masked is feelings.

"She left with Koga," he said plainly. Inuyasha could see past that fake look. Kagome looked to Inuyasha who rolled his eyes and followed his brother. The others stayed back, "why won't you go?"

"We need to talk Sesshomaru," Inuyasha said as he walked behind his older brother.

"Spit it out," Sesshomaru said feeling a pain in his chest.

"You need to stop holding back on Rin," Inuyasha said making Sesshomaru stop and glance back angrily at his brother, "I did the same with Kagome and only hurt us more. Do not let Koga win her over. If you let it go on he will find away to manipulate her into staying with him forever."

"Why would I care? If she chooses him let her be with him I will not stop her," Sesshomaru said looking off into the distance.

"You idiot you want to stop her! Stop being an ass and just tell her that you need her. Get over your pride and stop being such a moron!" Inuyasha yelled losing his temper, "do you think I want to be talking to you? Well I don't so get over it and stop being such a damn pussy."

"Your lucky you're my brother," Sesshomaru said turning towards his brother. Inuyasha shrugged before Sesshomaru walked passed him.

"If you won't do it for yourself bring her back for us," Inuyasha said knowing that Sesshomaru was a full youkai and way to prideful to give up all of his pride.

"I'll be right back… with Rin," he said walking past his brother towards where he had left Rin.

Authors note:

I hope you enjoyed! I wonder will Koga be her new pursuer? Or will he just use her as revenge on Inuyasha? Stay tuned to find out!


	14. 13: Flames and a love lost to pride

Chapter 13: Flames and a love lost to pride

Authors note: Thank youfor reading and reviewing! I love reviews!

Koga walked beside Rin glancing over at her here and there. Rin bit her lip nervously. They had been out for a long time and the sun was already starting to rise into the sky. She yawned stretching out as Koga looked over at her again. She wasn't Kagome… but she'd do. He was tired of the way his life was, and it was time for something new and fresh. Besides to see the look on that mutt's brother's face to see he took his human from him.

"You are tired?" Koga asked stopping. She looked at him and nodded. What a kind face she had, like Kagome's, "we will stop so you can rest."

"Really? Is that alright?" Rin asked shivering. He nodded and quickly made her a bed. She smiled as she lay down and quickly closed her eyes. She opened an eye to see him sitting there and watching her, "are you not sleeping?"

"I am watching over you," he said forgetting about the wounds on her back. She too had forgotten through the whole adrenalin rush, as well as the coldness making her body go numb, "you can sleep and still we'll be fine."

"Though… I am tired," Koga said looking around left to right to double check things.

"Then lay down. I feel safe enough," she said closing her eyes and shivering again.

"Your cold," stating the obvious as he laid close to her making her feel a little uncomfortable but she couldn't help but invite the warmness it brought. He did not sleep but lay there to make sure nothing invaded. Rin woke up to a noise and she quickly stood up. Koga felt the sudden change in environment and woke up. He then heard the noise of a scream.

"Stay here," he said before booking it.

"DON'T LEAVE ME HERE ALONE!" she yelled nervous of the sudden change in the wind. She quickly ran after him while tying her sheath on and applying the quiver with what was left of her arrows in her bag. She breathed hard as she ran after the fast youkai. A family was trapped between a pack of hungry looking youkai. With his claws Koga began to fight. Rin pulled out an arrow and shot it killing a youkai that was behind Koga. He looked at her and smiled, 'almost like Kagome…' Rin pulled out another and began to fight. When more started to surround them she pulled out her sword and began trying to kill them. Rin ran beside Koga as the family quickly escaped leaving them alone. Rin held up her sword ready to defend as she was back to back with Koga. He looked back at her to make sure he wasn't in it alone. She sliced her sword through the first youkai to attack. She ducked and tried her hardest to keep her balance and footing right as she sliced through the many youkai. Rin swallowed swinging her sword forward and could feel something inside her tremble, "…Shessomaru."

--

"Rin?" Sesshomaru asked looking around hearing her voice say his name. He had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach and booked it. He leaped into a ball of light dashed through the sky leaving no trace of a trail. His heart pounded as sweat dripped from his face as if he could feel exactly what Rin was feeling. He heard the sound of a battle and quickly dove towards it. He saw Rin back-to-back with Koga and bent over sweating as the youkai sat in front of her smiling with such evil. He dove down catching Rin off guard with his voice, "RIN!"

"Sessomaru?" she said softly as he brought his sword down slicing through the youkai threatening his women. He hollered swinging his sword making it cut through the hoard of youkai. Rin sat there breathing heavy as she watched him in action. WHAT A TURN ON! A small smile came to her face as without a problem he rid the ground of youkai. He then turned to Koga and Rin who stood there watching. Koga dusted his hands off.

"I had them before you butted in," Koga said placing his hands on his hips.

"Oh really?" Sesshomaru asked calm and coolly, "I leave Rin in your 'protection' for a minute and nearly have her killed. Rin let's go."

"Sess… Sesshomaru?" Rin asked shaking as she looked back at her new friend, "I cannot leave Koga."

"Just because you have a forgiving heart Rin, does not mean I do. I will never forget what he did to you, and so I will never forgive what he had done," Sesshomaru said his back turned to them, "and just now I almost lost you again. Only this time I would not have been able to bring you back. So please Rin let's go."

"Rin!" Kagome yelled running to the girl and hugging her. Rin hugged her but did not smile as she looked at the back of Sesshomaru's head.

"Koga?" Inuyasha growled, "What the hell were you thinking you idiot! You've caused an uproar and could have gotten her killed."

"Kagome," Koga bowed before taking Kagome's hand and kissing her, "at least it is a pleasure to see YOU. If dogface would shut the hell up a moment I would be able to explain myself."

"Why are you here Koga? Not that we aren't happy you are," Kagome said looking at him blankly. All her love was given to Inuyasha and he could tell she had none for him.

"You don't have to be so nice to him," Inuyasha said crossing his arms.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome said giving him the index finger that warmed him of a sit. He quickly shut his mouth and rolled his eyes.

"Thank you Kagome. Like I was saying… Ayame is gone. I believe she has left me," Koga said not looking in Inuyasha's direction already able to see the smirk on his face.

"Why would she stay?" Inuyasha laughed making Koga growl.

"Shut it mutt face!" Koga yelled before Kagome yelled for him to sit. Inuyasha plowed to the ground angry with his mate and future wife. Koga smiled as he placed his hands on his waist, "and if Ayame wants to be that way then two can play that game. I will take on Rin as my mate instead of her."

"Huh?" Rin's eyes nearly bulged out as Sesshomaru turned around quickly grabbing Rin and pulling her into his side.

"No, you will not," Sesshomaru said calm and coolly as Rin looked up at Sesshomaru, "and this is what you left me for?"

"I… didn't leave you," Rin said looking up into the amber eyes staring down at her, "you left me Sesshomaru."

"What?" He asked thinking back to the moment he had indeed left her. He looked down at her apologetically before looking up at the rest of them. His arm was still wrapped around Rin holding her tight to his side. His other hand went to his sword ready to defend his women, "this is my territory Koga so leave us alone."

"Sesshomaru?" Rin asked looking up at him her arms and face squished into him, "let's go…"

"Alright," he said releasing her and grabbing her hand aggressively and walking out of there. The others just watched then looked to each other.

"What about Kohaku?" Sango asked looking around worriedly. Miroku kissed the side of her head before grabbing her and pulling her to his side.

"Yeah… our territory," Miroku said to Koga making Sango's eye twitch before popping him in the head and then walking over to Kirara.

"Maybe she was taken Koga?" Kagome said shrugging.

"Obviously! He just walked away with her were you not paying attention?" Koga said clearly getting irritated.

"Keh," Inuyasha let out a snort that made Kagome glare at him, "deal with him on your own Kagome you made me sit."

"SIT!" Kagome shrieked her fist clenched at her side. Inuyasha's eyes widen before his rosary beads made him plunge for the dirt.

"I mean Ayame Koga," Kagome said glaring at Koga. He looked at her confused before catching her drift.

"Oh right… oh no!" Koga slapped his hand to his head, "all this time she has probably been waiting for me to rescue her!"

"Yeah you've been trying to court Sesshomaru's woman in the process. And you thought I use to be a two timer?" Miroku laughed before Sango dropped her Hiraikotsu on his head. He immediately cowered down as she wiped her hands together and then picked it back up. Miroku obediently followed pursuit.

"You can come with us until we find Ayame and Kohaku," Kagome said turning around. Inuyasha lifted her up and took off with Koga following right behind as well.

--

"Really?" Yuka said scratching his chin as he listened to Kohaku give the answers he so wanted to hear, "this turned out in our favor Kohaku do not feel guilty. We can finally get Lord Sesshomaru for all the things he has done to us. You know the plan… I've erased that wolf girls mind so when you find her she will believe that you saved her. She will believe anything you tell her."

"If you say so," Kohaku said sighing before changing into ragged clothing and dragging the unconscious girl into the forest.

"This will work Kohaku," the boy said nodding confirmation, "now don't let me down."

--

Rin paced uncomfortably in the meeting room as they discussed the current situation at hand. They had a serious problem. Both Ayame and Kohaku were missing, if it were easy it would be they were kidnapped together… but chances were it was two separate things. Sesshomaru sat off in the corner behind Rin as the others sat around the table.

"How do you suppose we go about this?" Sango asked laying her head on her arm. Miroku placed a hand on her back to make her feel better as her eyes got watery, "I am such a bad sister."

"Why do we even have to look for the boy?" Sesshomaru said emotionlessly making them all look at him.

"How dare you," Sango hissed standing up.

"Now darling control your hormones," Miroku said already expecting the slap to his face.

"I am not that far along you idiot!" She yelled cowering over him. He cowered down closing his eyes at the scary woman he called his wife.

"You're further then you think you are," Sesshomaru said with his arms still crossed making everyone look back at him with confusion. Sango's cheeks went red.

"He… knows?" Sango asked looking to Miroku, "why would you tell him!"

"He didn't tell me anything. I am surprised Inuyasha didn't sense the change," Sesshomaru said in his strong deep voice.

"Keh! I noticed she is pregnant," Inuyasha said crossing his arms and sticking his nose in the air. Sesshomaru just smirked.

"Sango?! Inuyasha you didn't tell me?!" Kagome said glaring at him. Inuyasha's ears went down as he slid into his seat. Sango was so red that she took off running. Kagome sighed before running off after her with the others. Rin with curiosity wanted to run after them too but Sesshomaru stopped her. She looked up at him as he grabbed her shoulders and looked her dead in the eyes.

"Sesshomaru what are you doing?" she asked looking deep into his beautiful golden eyes. He sighed before taking her hand and guiding her into a room where cozy white furniture decorated the room.

"Rin what were you thinking out there?" Sesshomaru asked standing with her in the middle of the room. She looked up at him and shrugged, "you could have been seriously hurt… or worst, Rin, and you could have been killed. I wouldn't have been able to bring you back. Rin…"

"Sesshomaru… why do you look so sad?" Rin asked placing a hand on his face as he trembled. His eyes almost seemed… watery? No it must have been the trickery of the light.

"Have you not been listening Rin?" Sesshomaru asked coldly as his grip on her arms grew tighter.

"Sesshomaru I was doing alright. I killed quite a few of those youkai," Rin said looking up at him worried at the coldness and helplessness in his voice.

"They were weak youkai Rin you were lucky and for that I am grateful that Koga was there. But Rin… if it were a powerful youkai you wouldn't have been able to do so," Sesshomaru said looking at her with seriousness, "Rin if I hadn't heard you call me…"

"I've fought large demons before Sesshomaru!" Rin said defending herself not realizing what was going on in his mind.

"Those were weird coincidences. Some sort of magic unknown protecting you Rin, not you alone," Sesshomaru said touching her face as if it would be his last touch. She looked up at him before he closed his eyes and turned around, "I need to think a moment leave."

"Yes Sesshomaru," she said swallowing before quickly trying to get to the door. He turned around to watch her leave.

"Rin return in an half an hour," Sesshomaru said looking at her with sadness in his eyes. Rin nodded before taking off to find the others. They had all separated figuring things out. Sango REFUSED to go home, and Miroku refused to face her wrath in asking her to go home. Rin sat on her bed with her knees curled to her chest. She played with her kimono as she waited for someone to come and get her. No one came and she was tired of waiting so she decided to leave. Rin turned a corner to see Sesshomaru and that girl Hachia the one he was originally betrothed too. Rin watched them from around the corner as they talked. She nodded before touching his shoulder and kissing him on the cheek. He looked down before looking back at the girl with a smile. Rin's eyes watered as her hands clenched into fists, that girl was going down. Rin had had it with that home wrecker. Rin waited for Sesshomaru to disappear before walking out and puffing up her eyes all round and watery, her cheeks puffy and Rin.

"Hachia!" Rin said catching the golden haired youkai's attention. Her ears went to the back before looking backwards and turning around.

"What do YOU want?" the girl said laughing. Rin didn't find it so funny as she walked over to her.

"Now I have always been a very sweet person, but if you keep this up… I am going to kick your pretty butt is that clear enough?" Rin said all puffed up like a blowfish ready to defend her territory.

"Excuse me?" the girl asked now lowering her eyebrows. Shippo walked down the hall with Miroku trying to hide from the anger and rage of a pregnant Sango. They saw a Rin they had never seen before.

"You think you are such a catch don't you? With your golden hair and long legs, you smile like such a lady innocent and sweet. You might have everyone else fooled but I see who you are. You are just a home wrecker; I know what you are trying to do. You think your going to ruin what Sesshomaru and I have. But you are not. And if I have to I will teach you a listen if you mess with my Sesshomaru, you don't stand a chance against me," Rin said showing off more then she had.

"Heh I could squish you," Hachia said with such a convincing smile that even Miroku and Shippo swallowed nervously.

"HA! You're a real go-getter aren't you? I am not scared of you. So before you try another move you and I need to get a few things straight. There is now two ways we can do this… how about I let you decide. You can take it somewhere else or we can take it outside," Rin said placing her hands on her hips. Shippo placed a hand on his mouth. Hachia just smirked before flipping her golden hair around, "that's right!"

"Pathetic useless irritating human. Not even worth lord Sesshomaru's appearance," Hachia said smirking before she felt two pair of hands deep in her long golden hair dragging her into the floor. She flailed around scratching everywhere. Koga was walking down the hall when he spotted Shippo and Miroku watching something around the corner.

"What are you creeps looking at?" Koga asked stopping.

"Cat fight!" Miroku said excitedly as he watched the girls roll around trying to gouge each other's eyes out.

"RIN!" Koga yelled running to his newest friends rescue. He pulled Rin off of Hachia as Rin flailed her arms around her dark black hair all over her face.

"I'll kill that stupid demon!" Rin said still kicking and screaming, "OUCH!"

"What?" Koga asked before dropping her hearing a thud, "oops!"

"My back," Rin said crawling onto her knees. Koga then remembered the marks on her back and quickly helped her up. Here I will get you help.

'I wonder if Ayame is alright,' Koga thought as he helped the girl walk to find someone who could help her wounds. He didn't want to look at them because she'd have to take off the top half of her garments. While looking they ran into Sesshomaru who was standing beside a golden haired Hachia. Clump's of hair was missing and Hachia had a black eye, which made Rin smile.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru asked trying to get a little distance between him and Hachia.

"Yes lord Sesshomaru," Rin said stepping forward away from Koga. Koga stood behind her hoping to get a word in.

"I've been looking for you. We need to talk," he said and before Rin could say anything he interrupted, "it isn't safe here for you anymore. You should head back to your village."

"What?" Rin asked her eyes widening in sadness. Sesshomaru did not change his expression at all, Rin looked back at a astound Koga.

"We need a moment alone," Sesshomaru said dismissing them. Koga hesitantly left and Hachia made sure to smile agonizingly at Rin, "Rin I am doing this for your safety."

"That's always been your excuse to get rid of me Sesshomaru," Rin said looking up at him watery eyed.

"This mission is dangerous and you are too reckless as much as I hate to admit it. I will find you when the world is in a better place. But Rin a part of you will always live inside of me, deep inside of my heart. The days keep coming without fail and so does danger," Sesshomaru looked down at her expressionlessly, "A new wind will find you, which are where your journey starts Rin… not with a youkai. Out in this world promise me you will be brave; you should go and see the valley and the peaks so that I may see you on the top Rin. Rin just don't forget met. Remember me when you're out walking. Remember me when snow falls outside your family's door. Remember me late at night when your not sleeping, and moonlight falls across your floor. You will find better love, strong as it ever was, deep as the river runs, warm as the morning sun… but don't forget me Rin. This way I can't hurt you anymore…"

"Enough," Rin said placing a hand in the air, "if you are going to make me leave… please don't give me a reason to want to stay. I'll leave… but let me leave with some dignity. I hate you for this. I hate you and never want to see you again!!!"

"Rin?" he said as she ran off in tears throwing the doors open. Sesshomaru closed his eyes trying to control himself, "…Rin."

"Sesshomaru?" Sango asked closing a door, "are you alright?"

"I let her go," Sesshomaru said softly, "which is the way it should be."

"You never held her prisoner Sesshomaru. She loves you," Sango said looking at him curiously, "so… where did she go? Is she in her room?"

"No," Sesshomaru said looking at the open doors sending in the chilly breeze of the night.

"Then where is she?" Sango asked scratching her head. She then looked out the door in the dirction he was looking, "you didn't…"

"I forbid any of you to go and bring her back," Sesshomaru said before turning and walking away slowly.

"How can you be so cold!" Sango yelled clenching her fist, "you idiot! The only chance at a real love and you throw her away like a piece of trash! You selfish stupid youkai! Kirara!"

"Mew," Kirara pounced out of a room.

"Go to Rin… take her where ever she wishes to go and keep her safe," Sango said sending Kirara off to find Rin.

--

Kirara dove from the sky crashing into the earth in front of a crying Rin. Kirara nuzzled the girl a moment but Rin just patted her and then kept walking. Kirara walked beside of her waiting for her to climb on. Rin told her to take her home… back to her old village. For the rest of the night they traveled for what felt like ages. Rin was slowly falling asleep on Kirara's back. Kirara mewed to wake her up before she went down to the village. Her village sat in tact as wonderful as ever. She bid goodbye to Kirara before walking into her old hut to cry the night away.

"I don't love him anymore… I don't love him anymore I hate him… I never want to see him again," Rin cried into her pillow until she fell asleep, "father Jaken… I miss you!"

-A week later-

"You look miserable," Inuyasha said throwing a grape in his mouth. Sesshomaru just glared at him.

"Well I am not," Sesshomaru said hoping the others would soon come in so he wouldn't have to deal with the awkward tension between him and his half brother.

"If your so miserable why don't you go and get her?" Inuyasha asked leaning back into his chair. Sesshomaru just looked to him with a blank face.

"No I won't," Sesshomaru said before looking away to the window.

"So then you _are_ miserable," Inuyasha smirked making Sesshomaru look at him and lower his eyebrows in warning.

"No I'm not," Sesshomaru said in irritation, "now stop bothering this Sesshomaru I am thinking."

"About Rin and how you want to go and get her?" Inuyasha asked still teasing and enjoying every minute of making his brother squirm.

"Shut up hanyou!" Sesshomaru said losing his cool, "I've heard enough! She is better off and safer without us!"

"You keep telling yourself that. I remember being in that stage," Inuyasha said thinking back to Kagome and him before they were mates.

"I am not you. I realized I don't love Rin," he said looking away lying to himself, 'I can't love Rin.'

"Don't you wonder if you're wrong Sesshomaru?" Inuyasha asked with curiousness stretching through his smooth voice.

"I'm never wrong," Sesshomaru said before softly saying, "just sometimes misdirected."

"Keh, what ever you say," Inuyasha rolled his eyes.

"We are going to take a break before going on with our journey. We could use healing time," Sesshomaru said getting up and frustrated to no extent left the dinning hall, 'she's not coming back…'

-Rin that same day-

Rin dragged the bucket of water across the floor and left it for the old woman and man. She then grabbed her bag and ran off. She had begun working for a little old couple to get some money for food. Rin took her money to a cart and bought some eggplants as winter was coming and they were limited to resources. She grabbed a thing of bread on the way and took it home. Her friends came by but she was not up for the company. It had been a week and already she was heart broken out of her mind. She sighed as she sat by a creek hugging her knees looking at the floor. She wondered where they had gone to, she had thought about going back but knew she would be shunned.

"Rin?" A voice came catching her off guard. She looked behind her and saw a familiar boy. It was Kayko. She looked shocked as she stood up and looked him over.

"I thought you were lost, I was nearly lost," Rin said touching his once again normal skin. He smiled and laughed before pulling her into his arms.

"Fate has brought us together. We should have died and here we are together in the same spot. It is meant to be," he said holding her tight. She closed her eyes as a tear slid down. If this was fate why was she so torn apart? "jineji healed me. He works miracles I tell you."

"That is good to hear," she said feeling the pain inside of her, 'maybe if I apologize and go back… no he would never listen. He doesn't love me.'

"Shall we go back?" he asked taking her hand and guiding her back. Rin sighed before following obediently.

"Perhaps… I should move on and be somebody. Our romance has already gone down to his foolish pride," she said as she felt something she hadn't felt before.

---

Sesshomaru paced in his room reliving every word they spoke. He punched the wall and sliced through curtains in anger. It would just be so simple to go and get her, but instead he sat letting his emotions take charge. He wrestled with the emotions defeating him, realizing he lost her his best friend. Sesshomaru threw the bed over before he heard a knock. He ran to the door hoping it was her but instead saw Jaken.

"I have to go and see her please I never got to say goodbye," Jaken said frantically. Sesshomaru nodded as Jaken looked around the destroyed feather covered the room. Jaken thanked him before running to find his mount. Koga said he would go with him for extra protection. Koga ran fast with Jaken on his back. It would take a while before they reached the village but still they went as fast as possible.

Miroku found Sesshomaru in the garden. After two and a half weeks without Rin Sesshomaru was even worst then before! Miroku was going to leave but realized it was best for him to say something. They were slowly breaking apart because of this. Kagome had left for her time, Inuyasha went to go and check on her, Rin was gone and now it was just the three of them.

"Sesshomaru," Miroku said sitting down knowing he had Sesshomaru's attention, "don't you realize your love is just another love lost to pride. The stubborn souls are the losers here on this earth, and while the bridges burn your only going to hurt the both of you and us more. Don't let this love go down to foolish pride… don't let it win."

"Leave me alone monk," Sesshomaru said before yelling, "she could have came back but she didn't!"

"Did you tell her she could?" Mirokua asked before leaving Sesshomaru with his painful thoughts. He sighed before lying down on a bench.

"Rin?" he asked hearing her voice in his head as if she were frantically calling for him. He squeezed his eyes close hard in pain.

---

Kagome sat reading a book on her bed as she kicked her feet up and down. She whistled realizing how addicted to the book she was. She flipped another page nearing the end. What a tragic romance it was. She was so excited to find out how the demon prince and human girl who had been really something magical would end up together after all of there problems. Her eyes burrowed at something the book said.

"He's never accepted me because of the human in me. It was as if he could see through everything except my heart…" Kagome read out loud no longer kicking her legs. Her mouth dropped when she read, "I began to think about how we had gotten here. To the moment where I faced him the full demon that I still loved and I killed him. How could he ever tell me to leave? How could he ever tell me that it was best this way? To go back to my old village… I hated him. I loved him and then I hated him, I nearly died because of it. My new wound mixed with my old ones… it was his entire fault. How he could tell me by sending me away he couldn't hurt me anymore. Why? Why did it come to this? Now forced to live this way forever…"

"Kagome?" Inuyasha asked sitting in her window seal.

"We have to go somewhere," Kagome said reading the name of the authoress.

----

Jaken watched the flames lick the sky with intense heat. Koga quickened his pace. Jaken hung on for dear life worried for his daughter. Finally they were nearing a clearing. Everything was catching on fire and falling into charcoaled rubble. They walked into the village that Kirara had dropped Rin off. Jaken jumped off looking at the dead people and huts on fire.

"RIN!" Jaken screamed running through the burning village. Things began to fall into rubble as Koga frantically ran through huts looking for her body.

"Rin?!" Koga yelled as he watched Jaken run to a house that was completely in flames. There was no way in… it was there old hut. Jaken cried out falling to the floor looking through the window at Rin who was lying on the ground with something lying on top of her unconscious. A gust of wind and white went by and quickly broke down the door running into the building.

"Sesshomaru-sama!" Jaken said excitedly. Koga stopped searching and ran to the building.

"Rin?" Sesshomaru asked looking at Rin laying there the necklace clasped in her hand. She looked dead but he didn't care he tossed the large log off of her before lifting her into his arms and running out before it collapsed. He walked out of the burning city past Jaken and Koga who stared in amazement. Sesshomaru's heart was pounding with intensity. Once away from the flames he sat down cradling her in his arms. His hand guided over her hair gently stroking her hair.

Authors note: Thank you to TheMysteriousAuthoress for the idea of the demon who heals. Instead of rewriting it I used him as an excuse for Kayko's "wonderful" (mysterious) excuse for being alive. Hmmmm I wonder what will happen. Sorry for the clffy but at 2:33 AM you can't seem to make a chapter any longer. Thank you all for being so supportive! Another chapter is already being worked on!

* * *


	15. 14: Apple blossoms, wishees, and

Chapter 14: Apple blossoms, wishees, and the undeniable emotion

Authors note: Thank you for those who have been reviewing my story! Thank you ALL for who is reading this right now… it is for you all who I write. But you should also leave a review so I know everyone I am leaving this for.

"Kay… ko," Rin whispered sucking in a breath. Sesshomaru swallowed quickly wiping away a stray tear afraid to let anyone including her see his moment of weakness.

'Oh thank you,' he thought lifting her up to his chest so she could see him. She looked at him and placed a hand to her head.

"My… head," she said shaking her head making him smile thankful that she had awaken. He gently pulled her to his chest, "where is Kayko?"

"Who? Wasn't he the one who you went a date on with once?" Sesshomaru asked looking down at her. She slowly looked up at him seeing whom it was holding her.

"Sessh… omaru?" she asked before closing her eyes. He looked at her face that had some black from the debris on it. He nodded looking down at her. How was it he had ran into many beautiful girls, many powerful youkai females… and in the end never loves any of them. Never loved anyone… until her? "Looks like… I wasn't better off after all."

"Rin?" he asked before she passed out again. He quickly lifted her up and jumped off into the sky not wanting to transform into his demon self-knowing the pain he would feel. Once he reached the castle he nearly broke down the castle doors before running to a room where all the injured went. He had a sweet-faced youkai female work on her. The women helped revive her and nurture her with fresh food and water. Rin sat up while everyone was at work, birds chirped outside her window as she looked around and placed a hand painfully on her back. A beautiful dress lay across a table near her. She took off her old tattered and dirty kimono and put on the dress. It was long and a lavender purple color. It was one of Kagome's festival dresses that Kagome had shown Rin. Rin had always wanted one like it; Kagome must have brought it back for her! Rin liked the way it felt on her, it was slightly weird but it was still something to see. Rin braded her long black hair and placed a bow around it. She touched the bruises on her arms and tried to forget that horrible night. The screams and how hard she had tried to stop it. Rin walked out of the room and down the stairs to find someone anyone.

"Rin?" Miroku asked looking at her with a smile, "It is good to see you're alright. I see you got Kagome's present. She had Inuyasha bring it back from her time to apologize for not being her for your return. Sesshomaru is out in the garden… if you want to see him."

"Uh," Rin looked to the door that led to the garden. She didn't know, but all she knew was it was his fault. Everything was his fault.

"Oh and Kagome says you should talk to Sesshomaru. She actually more like insisted you did," Miroku said shaking his head, "weird but I would do what she says."

"She did give me this beautiful dress after all. I wonder why," Rin said touching it delicately. Rin walked towards the garden hesitantly. Her hand trembled as it touched the door. She slowly opened it before shutting it beside her. A butterfly fluttered by as Rin walked into the garden. Why did Sesshomaru have a garden? She never saw him as the garden type.

"Rin?" he asked sitting up. He had been laying on the bench under the sun thinking before she had walked out there, " your alright."

"I guess," Rin said looking to him sadly. He stood up walking to her gracefully, it was such a warm day considering winter was nearly over and trees were still mostly bare. Except… for this place.

"Why do you say that Rin?" he asked touching her arm. She pulled her arm away and shook her head no.

"You said a lot of things that made no sense to me, but how could you think sending me away would keep you from hurting me?" she asked looking up at him. He sighed looking down, "do you know hat I went through?"

"Then tell me Rin," Sesshomaru said looking up to her, "tell me what happened…"

"It… all stated when I was sitting by the creek thinking of you. Kayko came up to me and I was so happy to see him. For days we were together a lot by his choice until one night when he came to my house. A look so abnormal…" she trailed off into the memory as she explained it to him.

--Flashback--

Rin looked at the ground as Kayko talked to her about how he loved her and wanted to marry her. She just told him her heart still belonged to someone else. That was when she heard the screams of people and a smile came to his face.

"I thought you my say that," Kayko said as strange markings came upon his face. Rin looked at him before trying to run past him. He grabbed her arm throwing her against the wall. She cried out before he lifted her up again. This time she punched him in the face and took off out the door. The whole village was being slaughtered… all her friends and memories being burnt alive.

"NO!" she screamed before grabbing her sword and attacking the youkai. It was no good her people were being slaughtered and she was defenseless and alone. She looked down at a boy about the age of thirteen laying with blood running down his nose. She closed her eyes and cried before turning her attention to Kayko. He was nowhere to be found. Then she saw one of her friend's alive running for her house, probably to make sure she was all right. Rin ran in after her, the door slammed shut. Her friend stood there smiling. Kayko walked out of a shadow and looked at her. She smiled bigger before blocking Rin's way, "why?"

"I've always know this day would come Rin. Rin is so sweet, Rin is so great, Rin is going to be the most beautiful. I was getting tired of it and one day Kayko came to me with a plot. Do you think he really liked you? You fool," the girl with short hair, said.

"But Shata you were my best friend," Rin said her eyes growing teary.

"Funny how everyone you ever loved betrays you isn't? It just shows how worthy of love you really are," Shata said looking over at Kayko. Kayko walked to Shata and kissed her. Rin stood there thinking about Sesshomaru.

'Sesshomaru… remember me even when our tears have long ran into the ocean,' she thought as a tear rolled down her eyes, 'I would never find a better love. And my journey began the day I found you… and ends here the day a die.'

"But now I can kill you," Shata said as Rin closed her eyes ready to go with her parents when she heard a gasp and spats of blood. She opened her eyes looking for a wound but saw Shata in front of her fall to her knees. Kayko pulled out his sword before kicking her over. He changed into… Sesshomaru? It was indeed not Sesshomaru but through the flames in her house he looked exactly like him.

"Shata?" she cried falling to her knees to look at her once dearest friend. Shata looked up at her relieved of the burden she had been dealt.

"Rin…" Shata said softly before closing her eyes and smiling. Rin cried harder onto her friend as the village burned. A loud sob came from Rin as she cried for fear and the situation.

"You monster!" Rin screamed at the boy who laughed. Rin pushed Shata's head off of her lap before standing up, "kill me or I'll kill you."

"Very well," and with the swift movement a large beam fell down onto Rin knocking her down, as she lay there on the floor unable to move.

"Sesshomaru… will save me," she said softly trying to handle the pressure of the large beam as it crushed her. She coughed feeling her wound on her back growing worst. But as she passed out she thought, 'I've been here an hour… he isn't coming. Maybe… she was right. He doesn't love anymore… why would he come? I wish… I could have seen him one last time. This… is all his fault.'

-End of Flashback-

"Rin?" he said softly without any emotion being shown. Rin shook her head no before backing up as tears glistened her brown eyes.

"I died back there Sesshomaru," she said wiping a tear away shakily, "I died back there and you can't bring me back."

"Rin I am sorry I know I should have said it sooner but I am sorry," he said looking at her, "I did it with the best of intentions."

"Sesshomaru not everything turns out like we think it should. This world has gone crazy and it is hard to believe that tomorrow will be better then today," Rin said looking at the ground.

"Do it anyways Rin," he said grabbing her arms and looking at her.

"Why didn't you let me die!" she screamed at him crying hard. He pulled her into his arms squeezing her tight. His eyebrows furrowed as he felt something different, "I hate you! I hate you and I don't love you!"

"Rin your back is on fire," he said as it felt it would burn him. She touched the back of her back and felt it too, "let me look at it?"

"Excuse me?" she asked trying to be mad at him.

"I promise I won't try anything inappropriate," Sesshomaru said untying the back of it so he could get a better look. His face went into one of concern, "Rin why didn't you tell me that you were so deeply scratched?"

"Because they are just scratches. That isn't the concern at hand here," Rin said in frustration as he took her arm and pulled her into the castle up to his room. She was shocked when he tossed her inside, "what do you think your doing?"

"Take off your dress Rin," he said making her nearly yet scream until he threw something. It was a pair of pants and a shirt that tied up in the front, "put the pants on and put the shirt on backwards."

"What why?" she asked hugging his clothes close to him.

"Because I said so now do it," he said filling up a large basin of cold water and hot water. She quickly turned around dropping the dress and changing. She then walked to him in his clothes. She looked so cute there in his shirt and pants, though she felt uncomfortable, "climb in here."

"What?" she asked looking at him like he was losing it. When he gave her that warning look she jumped right in. He opened the back looking at the damage.

"How could you not feel this Rin?" Sesshomaru said shuttering. Rin tried to look over her back at I but couldn't see it, "it's infected Rin."

"What?" Rin said as he handed her a small mirror and pointed a second one so she would be able to see it. She gasped at the deep black gashes oozing green pus. It looked so disgusting, "I don't want to die!"

"Calm down Rin, "he laughed sponging it down and grabbing some medicine, "you'll live through this. It is just… sorry."

"That hurt," she said feeling him sponge off the gross stuff. He just smiled as he kept cleaning it. She sighed knowing it had to be done but wincing again.

"Rin… I need to know," he said catching her off guard.

"What is it?" She asked as he gently touched her shoulder.

"When I woke up this morning Rin and wiped the sleep from my eyes. I found that another day had come without you and I realized you were gone. I am just at this state of confusion, and am hoping things aren't the way they seem. I kept dreaming you would come home…" Sesshomaru stopped realizing what he said. Rin gasped looking back at him. He had basically called it _their_ home, "tell me I was dreaming Rin. Tell me you didn't leave me here alone; tell me you didn't say you didn't love me anymore. Tell me it was just my imagine telling lies. Rin tell me you didn't say goodbye."

"Sesshomaru?" she asked looking at him. She scratched her head not expecting it, "did you miss me at all?"

"I missed you a little," she said making her frown before he smiled and said, "I missed you a little when you were gone. A few memories kept holding on. So Rin I guess you could say I missed you a little. A little too much, a little too often, a little more every day."

"Really?" she asked smiling at him, "then tell me right now that you choose me over your pride? Tell me that the competition for you is over."

"Did you miss me at all?" Sesshomaru asked looking at her back as he gently sponged it. Rin smiled and looked down at the water that was growing cold.

"In my heart I carried a picture of you. I would close my eyes to see it. I had memories of you I carried in my soul; I would wrap it close around me for when the nights got cold. If you had asked me how I was doing then I would have said just find… but the truth is if you had read my heart it would have said something different," Rin said smiling at the water, "the truth is it would have said not a day went by that I didn't think of you. After all that time how could I not? Somehow you remained locked so deep inside. Sesshomaru not a day went by."

"Rin," he said pulling her out of the water so he could look her in the eyes, "every night I wished you were there next to me with your against my heart. Rin I do love you… and minutes turned to hours, and the hours to days, and it seems it's been forever since I felt this way. Rin after all this time your still here next to me, no matter how cruel and uncaring towards you I acted. There has been times I felt like only a half a youkai, life has had be down on my knees. Troubled times I don't understand why are happening to me. I have struggled with darkness, and now I have found the light. Rin if I lost you there would be no sunshine shining through, and I don't know anymore what I would do if I lost you. So Rin there is no more competition. Rin like a bird without wings, like a fish out of water, like a dreamer without a dream… I have learned about losing, I could lose almost anything but not you. So if it takes losing my pride to keep you, then I can live without… but not without you."

"Sesshomaru?" she said expecting anything but that. His lips fell onto hers before he softly whispered to her.

"I don't know what in the world I would do without you," he said closing his eyes and smelling her hair. She smiled as her hands fell onto his shoulders. He was careful not to mess with her cuts as he held her close and laid his hand on her head.

"Thank you," she said softly. He smiled before finishing wrapping her back. When everything was done they went down to eat. It seemed like only Rin was really fazed by that moment, Sesshomaru ate silently not sure how to act. Rin smiled at him as he ate. Rin finished picking at her grapes before feeling full, "we should do something!"

"What?" Sesshomaru asked looking at her with curiosity. She stood up completely board.

"Well Kagome is still gone, and things are still under construction so let's go and do something," Rin said not wanting to sit around and feel like she was wasting a time. He nodded and stood up.

"Where?" he asked keeping his question simple.

"Anywhere… lets just start walking and see where we go," Rin said as he followed her. They walked through the grass waving with the wind. Sesshomaru's hand went around hers making her smile. How could she ever want to give this up? Sesshomaru led her to a tiny waterfall. Rin gasped in excitement. He smiled happy to see her smile. Rin turned and pushed him in laughing.

"Rin!" he yelled jumping out shaking it off, "I hate getting wet!"

"Come on please?" she said walking in. He looked at her frustrated. He walked in barefooted as he reached her. They were calf deep. He touched her face before kissing her. Her arms gently wrapped around his neck as his wrapped around her wrist pulling her close to him, "Sesshomaru after all this has passed. Once we've all gone through this… there will be beauty from all of this pain."

"I promise that I will bring beauty once it has passed," Sesshomaru said smiling at her, "Rin you are my beauty from my pain."

"I will cling to your promise Sesshomaru," she smiled up at him as he looked down at her. He smiled before swinging her in a circle. Once he let go she went flying into the water making a giant splash. Sesshomaru dove in after her. She splashed him before swimming away. He laughed swimming after her. She swam backwards so she could watch him. He cornered her into a large rock. He swam up to her his feet barely touching. He stood on his tiptoes as she pushed off the rock into him. He caught her as her legs wrapped around him. She kissed him her long black hair tangling with his. Water dripped from her eyelash to his cheek. He kissed her passionately loving every minute he savored with her, "you have surrounded me and showed me I belong to you Sesshomaru. I belong to you, and I know you're the one who won't ever let me down. I belong to you."

"And… I belong to you," he said feeling kind of hesitant to say it. She could here it in his voice but she didn't care. They both climbed out and lay under the sun. She laid her head on his chest like she use to closing her eyes and letting out a deep breath that tickled his skin. Rin sat there smiling the whole time. She could hear the sound of his heart, the birds, and the soft gentle warm wind. He could hear her let out a deep breath again, "what are you thinking?"

"Well… that the sun is shining everyday, and the clouds never get in our way. That I am wrapped up, emotionally attracted, so recklessly I need you… and so sure that I love you," she said smiling before looking up at him. He smiled down at her, "I never knew I could feel like this. If I am dreaming don't wake me up."

"I won't," he smiled down at her, "and I love you too."

"Are you sure?" she asked as he nodded his head yes and then looked up at the sky his arm wrapped around her, "I can't believe this is real. The way I feel… I am head over heals I think."

"How do you really feel?" Sesshomaru teased her. She looked at him and thought about it.

"Hmmm… like I am so electrically charged up, kinetically acted, erratically needing you, fanatically forget too, magically sure as the sky is blue… I love you?" she said making him smile. He sighed before pulling her closer if possible. A breeze blew through an hour later waking them up telling them night was coming. They quickly headed back to the castle for a quick dinner. He walked her to her room and kissed her good night.

Morning came and Sesshomaru sat up quickly running to her door. He woke Rin up pulling her out of bed. They walked down the stairs as she rubbed her eyes. When they walked out of the castle Rin smiled at Sesshomaru. Rin shuttered in the cold iciness of the morning. Sesshomaru placed his fur around her before walking forward through the frost covered crisp grass. For being almost spring it sure was cold.

"It is so cold," Rin said as her words transformed into white smoke.

"A heavy wind is nearly here," Sesshomaru said stopping, but he did not look back.

'I've done something wrong and he's tired of me already," Rin thought worriedly before saying out loud, "Sesshomaru… th… then why do we not stay in the warmth of the castle?"

"Rin just follow me. Do it without complaint… if you love me that is," he said making a small smile come to her face. He could smell her fear, and he was frightened that she might be afraid of him. They reached a small grove full of trees holding blooming apple blossoms, "Rin stand in the middle."

"Alright," she said trusting him. She stood there looking at him trying to keep her emotions under control as a gust of wind blew in there making the long stemmed dandelion seed head lose all the white star like things that he use to call wishees. The pink apple blossoms flew off of the tree mixing with the tiny white seeds being carried by the white star like thing carry them. A smile grew on Rin's face at a fast rate as she spun around. Everything blew around her while she danced with the wind making Sesshomaru's face gain a small smile. Once the wind died down he walked into the falling pedals and wishees. She looked up at him with rich warm eyes full of love and trust… something he wished to never lose again. Her scent had changed a lot, though she didn't change much at all. Though her body WAS changing a little. It began to reveal more and more of the woman she was about to become. He closed his eyes and he sniffed the hair by her ear. Rin closed her eyes as he gently grabbed a strand of her hair and played with it. Rin could feel the pounding in her chest as she realized the affection Sesshomaru was showing her.

This was his loving side. This was Sesshomaru without his armor, without a block to his heart, no more rejection she hoped. Both his hand hands slide through her hair as he tested the soft silkiness of it. She felt his nose gently push against the side of her head sniffing her hair some more. She gently moved her head as to show her affection back. He moved his face so he could look at the love of his life. It was then and there as he picked a soft pink pedal from her hair that he knew he had fully accepted her. He knew then and there she was no longer Rin the "human" he loved; she was Rin… the one he was IN love with the undeniable emotion. He began to notice rapidly how her body was growing and her figure was getting curvier then before. How he longed for her, but couldn't see himself with Rin in such a way yet.

But he could no longer let his minf cover his hearts desires. He swallowed uncomfortably moving away from her and looking away from her. Rin looked at him in confusion. Why when they were getting closer did he change his mind about his feelings?

"Sesshomaru?" She asked standing in place not wanting to move. Sesshomaru realized in what way his body craved. He had her devotion, her affection, even her love… but that wasn't everything. Now he wanted her body, all of it… he wanted it to be his and his alone. He knew of one and only one way to cure his craving and relieve his mind. Which is why he he knew he had to keep his distance. Rin stepped forward but Sesshomaru put his hand up so that she'd know to stop. She did as he commanded but stared at him angrily.

"Why won't you open up to me? Why won't you surrender your heart to me? Why do you keep pushing me away?" Rin said trying to not cry.

"It isn't that easy Rin," Sesshomaru said trying to keep himself under control. He didn't want her angry because they were so close to becoming happy.

"Yes it is you idiot! Just tell me what it is so I know!" she yelled closing her eyes and clenching her fist.

"I want you!" he yelled at her anger and guilt pouring from his amber eyes. She looked at him tired of the same old battle.

"You have me Sesshomaru," Rin said look at him with puppy dog eyes that tore him apart inside.

"Not… all of you," he said looking down, "I don't know that no other man cannot steal you from me. Rin… I don't ever settle for only half. But for you I have. It isn't in a youkai's instinct to wait… before… before, we have animal like instincts. We choose our mates and almost never base it off of love. So it isn't in my nature as a male youkai, to uh… have instincts that are hard to control…"

"Sesshomaru I am not a child anymore. Everyday I have tried to tell you, and every day I thought I got through to you that all I want is for you to see all I want is you. I am yours and I've always been. All of me... I've just been waiting for you to accept it. To accept that this, all of me that I have… it's yours. And once again here I am after you told me the competition was over, here I am again standing in front of me trying to give you me hoping you'd accept me for once. But you have to choose Sesshomaru. Choose me or your pride, choose me… and choose all of me," Rin said looking up at her youkai lover, "which is why I wonder if you ever trusted me enough to accept me or let me in. You sent me away not to protect me, but because you didn't trust me…"

"How could you say that Rin?" Sesshomaru asked in shock but mostly anger.

"You didn't trust me enough to let me love you. Armless, hairless, title-less, or eyeless… even all combined I have always loved you. From the moment I moment I met you I knew I'd be with you forever. I love all of you Sesshomaru and that is all I do and ever will love. I love you for who you are Sesshomaru, the person behind the mast of yours. Only you can have me… and all I ask of you, is to love me. To love me enough to let me in, tare down those walls so that you can I am here and that I need you. But you have to choose to, don't do it for me… choose to because I am what you want. You can't keep changing your mind about how you feel for me, can't you see it hurts me?"

"Rin I don't want to hurt you I never have. I never wanted to do wrong, and I don't ever want to tell any lies. I love you Rin, against my will. I do love you and I have tried so hard not too. Your love is like a deep dark river, pulling me out to sea… the harder I try to resist Rin the weaker I seem to be. I never didn't trust you, I just was scared to be trusted with your heart," he said looking at her hesitating taking a step towards her.

"What are you saying?" Rin asked so confused. He looked at her standing so far away hating the space between them.

"In the time we've spent together Rin, I've learned to trust in you. So many things you've given before I even asked you. But reality and love sometimes far enough so what I really need to know is can you trust me with your heart?" he asked looking at her, "can you can stand the heavy load of being my mate? Do you trust me enough to stay with you down that long and winding road? Do you trust me with your heart?"

"When two hearts are slowly surrender Sesshomaru… and are sword to understand, it completes a perfect union," she said as he walked towards her. Once they reached each other he picked her up in his arm. He squeezed her tight before letting her down. Rin kissed him passionately. He did not object and he did not let his mind cover his heart. He quickly untied her kimono.

"Are you sure?" he asked between kisses. Rin just finished his job by taking off the rest answering his question without words. Sesshomaru's hands grabbed her face as they made their way to the ground. His fingers entwined her hair as he as quickly as possible got out of his clothing and placed it onto the ground and gently positioning her on her back. Her arms wrapped around his neck as he placed himself between her legs. His kisses gently massaged her lips as her body trembled and a feeling in the pit of her stomach went wild at each touch from him. His hand gently glided over her breast down her side and down her thigh lifting her leg a little, "this always hurts the first time for females."

"It's alright I'm ready," she said as he kissed her again hoping it would help her keep her mind off of the pain as he tried to gently enter. She gasped making him feel bad, but it would make no difference to turn back there. He quickly finished entering then laying more kisses on her as she slowly got use to him being inside of her. Her body shook but slowly she began to grow slightly numb to it as he began sliding in and out. Her fingertips gripped into his back making him smile as he went in and out quicker. He began to breathe harder as he began to kiss her chest. His youkai instincts were slowly coming to him half an hour later.

"Are you ready for the other part?" he asked slowing down slightly, "it won't be anymore comfortable then what just happened."

"I'm ready," she said as he began to thrust again this time he licked her neck and then she felt his fangs sink into her neck. She winced feeling her blood trickle down as a golden aura surrounded them making them one. One mind, one body, one soul… her fingers dug deeper in his back as he slowly let go of her neck and began kissing her were the mark was. Rin let out a breath she had been holding in as her arms slowly slid from around his neck so that her hands rested on his muscular arms. He slowly stopped realizing she had had enough for one day. Both their bodies were glistening with sweat as he pulled her into his bare chest feeling the skin from her breast on his chest.

--

"Hello is Ms. Olaka home?" Kagome asked a young girl. The girl nodded before turning to find the women. A women with long dark gray hair down to the floor walked up. Her eyes widened looking at Kagome.

"Kagome?" the old women said catching Kagome off guard. The old women grabbed her neck feeling something sting.

"Are you alright?" Kagome asked getting over the shock. The women let go revealing marks just like Kagome's, "You didn't have those before."

"I know," she said as Kagome recognized those same brown eyes, "he never marked me."

Authors note: Sorry another cliffhanger I suppose. I hope you enjoyed it though… it was about time he made a damn commitment though! What a guy thing! Well I am going to go watch the Wicker Man now I have been waiting to see it! Some lines were created (mixed around) from Martina McBride, "I love you." That would be when they are laying after swimming.


	16. 15: A sudden twist of fate

**Chapter 16: Marked and accepted a sudden twist in fate**

Authors note: Thank you all for reading and for the reviews. YOU ROCK!

Disclaimer: Just thought I'd mention that I am only borrowing the characters... they do not belong to me at all. Only the plot and well... sudden change of personailty. I guess the only way to write a character like it is original form is to well... be the actual writer. So no flamers please... if you do not like it... please just go read a different fanfic and let me deal with my own. Thank you. whispers thank goodness no flamers yet

Rin lay next to Sesshomaru as the grass tickled her skin. Sesshomaru lay watching her as she was cuddled up next to him. A small smile crossed his face, a smile he had not expected. Rin moved her head a little as Sesshomaru propped his up on his hand. He let out a soft sigh as Rin pulled his shirt up higher covering her bare arms. He smiled as he looked down at her long thin legs. She slowly opened her eyes to a sunny after noon. She smiled before sitting up and looking around. A look of confusion sat on her face before she looked to Sesshomaru then to herself. He sat up also and lifted his huge shirt up and draped it over her before pulling her close.

'What just happened? Did he mark me?' Rin thought trying to recall everything. She looked to Sesshomaru who looked off into the bight day.

'Now no one else can have her. I spent so long hated humans, I never knew it felt so good to love one…' Sesshomaru thought before looking over to her. She looked down before looking back up at him. He kissed her soft shoulder before sighing and looking off out of the distance again, 'is this going to complicate things with the son of Naraku?'

'Why does he always look so sad? He will smile and just like that poof it is gone! That sigh… it doesn't sound happy,' she thought before looking down. She sighed hugging her knees feeling awkward. Sesshomaru looked over to her not sure how to show her he was worried, 'why do I always sit around and let him mope!'

'What will I do if I must choose to do the right thing or her life?' Sesshomaru's mind was racing with questions he didn't want to answer. Rin turned to face him making him look at her with his usual look. But his eyes said he adored her. She wrapped her arms around his neck her legs wrapping around his waist. He swallowed before slowly wrapping his arms around her back. He let out a gentle sigh onto the crevasse of her back, this did change everything… this changed him.

--

"Ahhh," the old women said gripping at her chest. Kagome grabbed the old lady looking at her as if she knew her. Was… it Rin? Kagome walked into the house and helped the women down into a chair.

"Kagome what have you done? These… memories are not… mine," the old women said placing a hand on her head, "these scars… are not mine."

"Rin is that you?" Kagome asked looking at the old women. The old women stopped and looked at Rin.

"You've changed everything," Rin said looking at Kagome, "yet you've changed nothing…"

"That… doesn't make sense none of this makes sense," Kagome said looking at the old women feeling crazy.

"You've changed the past by something you said or did, but… you didn't stop me from killing Sesshomaru," the old Rin said looking sadly gaining new memories, "you only made me hesitate… and in the end gain this."

"Hu?" Kagome's eyes widened at the nasty looking scar, "how can I stop this? How can I help change the course of fate from that book Rin? You wrote the book… now how do you rewrite it?"

"Kagome you don't," Rin said looking at her, "why have you come this wasn't supposed to happen. How did you get that book?"

"An old lady gave it to me while walking on the streets," Kagome said looking at Rin, "who have you become? How do…"

"Who I had to become," Rin said the once sweet innocent face now one that told of sadness and anxiety… and history of pain, "who I had to become to save the world."

"What… happens Rin?" Kagome asked sitting down and holding Rin's hand. The wrinkles on her face were so sad, her once long black hair now longer gray hair. She looked sick.

"Once I die it will all start over again? But I do not know exactly how it goes, and if I told you what I know you would try and stop it. But things will change probably for the worst if you change them Kagome," Rin said sighing as she placed a hand to her heart, "I grow frailer with everyday. When I die the Rin you know in the past will become… who we are suppose to become."

"Rin what happens?" Kagome asked with seriousness, "Rin… tell me please. I have to know."

"I cannot tell you that. But I will warn you that… you should spend everyday with those that you love. Because you never know what can happen," Rin said touching the mark on her neck.

"Tell me what would have happened if things hadn't changed the way they did. You don't have to tell me what will happen now… just tell me what would have happened that isn't cheating," Kagome said swallowing thinking about her friends, "what have we gotten ourselves into?"

"Something that no one else would Kagome… you don't know what we… you are up against. None of us knew…" Rin trailed off her eyes growing misty at the thought.

--

Sesshomaru and Rin walked back towards the castle. He was silent as usual, but surprisingly so was she. She stopped to pick a couple of flowers smelling them with a huge smile. Sesshomaru gave a half smile as he watched his… mate? Wow… a human… the irony. But she wasn't a human to him anymore, she was just Rin his mate. The women he actually loved… besides Kagura. She somewhat had meant something to him. He quickly pushed those thoughts out of his mind and quickly reverted back to her. She turned around handing him the flowers. He looked at them in her hands sighing and grabbing them knowing he'd hurt her feeling's if he didn't. He took the prettiest one and stuck it in her ear, and then took another and stuck it another and kept the other two. He smiled thinking, 'heh… two flowers. Her and I.'

"Sesshomaru?" she asked scratching her head feeling young again, feeling as if she was allowed to be young again. She no longer had to fend for herself.

"You've changed already," he said softly making her look at him, "you seem… like yourself again."

"I guess… I always had to carry a lot on my shoulders. I just… feel relieved now not having to carry secret feelings and frustrations," Rin shrugged grabbing his hand. He lifted her hand to his lips and gently kissed it before turning and trailing off.

"Things have changed now Rin," Sesshomaru said softly making her look at him as the trees swayed in all directions.

"What do you mean?" Rin asked looking at him innocently. Her smile melted the ice off his frozen heart.

"It means now that we are… mates. We…" he tried so hard to explain it trying to not go red or get off course.

"It means you can stop treating me like a child my lord," Rin smiled plucking at a flower, "tell me what you have to say. I apparently am not young anymore."

"No your not," he said releasing her hand and turning to look off into the distance. He crossed his arms and sighed. What had they gotten themselves into? He tried so long to protect her… and himself. To think his only real threat was a human girl… female. It was so strange when she was young he saw her as his to protect almost a friend, but that shattered when he sent her away. Ten years apart did a lot to him, and changed her from a wild child… to a grown woman. He didn't see the transformation; he didn't get to watch her grow. Things change and he knew that… but how could he allow himself to change his opinion in the whole season and a half they had been together again.

"Sesshomaru…" she trailed off realizing it was no good. When he was set on something he was set, and she didn't even know what she was trying to change his mind on!

"Rin I am a youkai and though I love you it doesn't change that you're a human…" Rin's eyes widened and her mouth dropped and quickly interrupted him with complete emotion.

"Is that what this is about? Does the fact that I am only a human still bother you?" Rin asked watery eyes. He quickly turned to look at her.

"No," was all he said making her slump down and sigh.

"Then what is it!" she said feeling her nerves being pulled to the limit.

"The world Rin. I am not one of your kind and you are not one of mine. We are a mixed breed Rin… that is how Inuyasha was brought to this world and look how he turned out," Sesshomaru said sighing.

"What is wrong with Inuyasha?!" Rin yelled placing her hands on her hips, "at least HE doesn't care about what others think of him and Kagome! At least they can be in public and hold hands and he doesn't get embarrassed!"

"Rin? Rin!" Sesshomaru yelled as she stormed off in tears. Rin ran through the forest going in a zigzag so he "couldn't find her" as if he couldn't smell her. She stopped and slumped onto a rock. She curled her knees into her arms as she laid her face on her legs letting her long black hair cascade everywhere.

"Maybe there is something the matter with me. I don't get why he hates humans so much? Why? Maybe if I were different it would be easier to love me. But why?" Rin sighed she felt a strong breeze comfort her. What was it that she was feeling? Sesshomaru slowly walked up behind her in his cool and casual… usual way. Rin knew he was behind her… somehow she could just sense it, "why won't you leave me alone?"

"Don't cry Rin. Sometimes you can't be so sensitive to things, especially when a youkai is your mate," Sesshomaru said standing behind her. Humans were so touchy, "I don't get embarrassed Rin. At first it was just uncomfortable, you're my mate now and I will not deny that."

"Then why do you get so touchy when it comes to everyone else?" Rin asked looking at him. Sesshomaru sighed.

"They don't understand us Rin. They have a different perspective then you and I, and Inuyasha and Kagome," he said looking at them, "they don't accept us."

"Then don't listen to them. What do they know? They'll see in time my lord I know they will. Sesshomaru why can't you see that they just don't trust what they can't explain. We aren't that different at all," Rin cried into her legs. Sesshomaru knelt on one knee wrapping his arms around her legs and laying his chin on her knees. He looked up into her sad teary eyes.

"Rin stop crying it will be alright. Take my hand… I will protect you I promise. I will be here so don't cry, I hate the smell of it… the smell of your tears hurt," he said looking into her eyes. She took his hand and sniffled a little, "Rin you are in my heart forever. Your what grew in my heart…"

"Really?" Rin asked smiling at him her eyes growing big and bright. He smiled at the sudden change in emotions.

"Always Rin… from this day on now and forever more," he said closing his eyes feeling the warmth of the sun on his back as he pushed his head into her lap more, "but Rin… when destiny calls us you must be strong. I may not be with you, but you have to hold on Rin."

"Sesshomaru you'll be with me forever," she said smiling down at her youkai whose eyes were closes, "I'll be with you forever and always. Besides together we have to show the world the power of love."

"Mmmm," he muttered before letting out a deep breath, "I suppose we do."

--

"It will soon happen Kagome… there is no stopping it," Rin said softly gaining a new memory, "such love ended up coming… from all the hatred. But I wish I could have seen him one last time."

"I will bring him to you," Kagome said hastily standing up and grabbing her bag. Rin looked up ready to say no… but the new memories would not allow her to say no. What had Kagome done? What horrors would now befall upon them? And now that she would see Sesshomaru before she died… what would happen then?

Kagome ran with haste jumping down the bone eaters well. Kagome jumped back out into the feudal era. Inuyasha sat leaning against a tree. She leaped into his arms leaving him a big kiss. He looked at her with confusion as he peeled her off. He checked her over for any bumps.

"Are you alright Kagome? You never kiss me like that!" he said looking at her in shock, "in fact it has been awhile since you've not been angry with me."

"I just realized that every minute is important… that's all," Kagome said getting teary eyed before plowing herself into him again. He smiled pulling her close and smelling her sweet desirable scent, "Take me to Sesshomaru as fast as you can."

"What?" he asked before rolling his eyes at the look she gave him. He lifted her up onto his back before saying, "what about the 'every minute is important?'"

"It is which is why you need to stop talking and start going!" Kagome yelled before he sighed and ran off. She hugged close to him loving when he ran with her on his back. It took them awhile and most of his energy, and air, to get to the castle. Sesshomaru was not there! When Kagome walked out of the caslte Rin and Sesshomaru walking back holding hands. He was looking off in the distance as she gazed up at him lovingly. 'How could that Rin turn into the Rin I just met?'

"Kagome!" Rin yelled letting go of Sesshomaru's hand to hug Kagome. Kagome smiled feeling much happier with that Rin.

"Rin I need to speak to Sesshomaru for a moment," Kagome said making Rin nod before walking off to the castle to brag to Sango about Sesshomaru and her.

"What is it?" Sesshomaru asked crossing his arms. Inuyasha stood there waiting to hear until Kagome turned to look at him.

"Inuyasha," Kagome said giving him the look. He sighed before walking off muttering curses to the two, "He's so temperamental. But I love him."

"Right. Get to the point," Sesshomaru said looking off at Rin.

"I need you to go with me back to my time," Kagome said handing him one of the necklaces they made. He took it in his hand looking at it then to her as if it were wise to give him something so powerful.

"Why should I? You shouldn't give this to me," Sesshomaru said handing it back to her, "I don't need it…"

"I trust you Sesshomaru… only because if you tried to take it you'd lose Rin," Kagome said seeing the sudden change in Sesshomaru's stature and eyes… something told her of deep compassion and love for Rin, "which is why right now I beg of you to go back with me for a minute. You have to go back for Rin. I cannot tell you but it may save her life."

"What do you mean what is wrong with her?" Sesshomaru asked uncrossing his arms and looking back towards where Rin was closing the door.

"Just follow me and you will see. It is the future after all," she said walking to where Kirara sat playing with some string. Kirara nodded before transforming. Sesshomaru looked back at the castle before transforming into a ball of light clenching the shard in his hand. Kagome leaped off of Kirara and jumped into the well. Sesshomaru hesitated before jumping down looking around. He had been there once before for Rin, back when things were complicated and he was scared of himself… and being able to protect her against himself. They walked through the yard to her house. Her mother smiled before grabbing the key and tossing them to Kagome. Sesshomaru looked at the thing they called a car touching it curious as to what it was. He pulled out his sword when it all of a sudden started making noise. Kagome laughed turning off the car, "get in you idiot.

"Excuse me?" Sesshomaru asked pointing the swords towards her. She went red smiling big.

"Heh, too soon I see. Hop in," she said throwing the door open. He climbed in examining everything. Kagome started the car thankful he didn't totally ruin the car like Inuyasha had when he first got into her first car. This was her third… thanks to Inuyasha's temper. Kagome turned the car and got it onto a main road driving down to where the house was. It was an hour drive from where she lived. Kagome got out and waited for Sesshomaru… but he couldn't get out. He was about to pull out his sword before she started yelling, "No it's alright! I'll get the door for you."

"That was pointless," Sesshomaru said climbing out and shaking himself off feeling weird. She walked to the door and knocked waiting for an answer.

"My lady doesn't wish to speak with you," the maid tried to close the door but Kagome pushed the door open irritated. Sesshomaru walked in looking at the girl who was staring at him weird.

"Why'd you come back? Why were you medaling?" Old Rin asked sighing before Sesshomaru walked in looking at things as if this place were weird. She softly whispered, "Sesshomaru?"

"Do… I know you?" he asked looking at her weird as he walked towards her. Kagome looked to Sesshomaru.

"Lord Sesshomaru," Rin's eyes got teary eyed as she tried to get out of bed, "Kagome what have you done… you died."

"Excuse me? Kagome what the hell is going on here?" Sesshomaru asked glaring at Kagome. The old Rin smiled up at him. She missed his attitude, she missed his silence… she missed him. 500 years without him was a long time to live without him. Even longer then that… she stopped counting.

"Sesshomaru," her eyes grew teary as Sesshomaru and Kagome both looked at her. Sesshomaru looked at her eyes recognizing her eyes, "not… possible."

"Sesshomaru," Kagome nodded before he walked forward.

"But… how?" Sesshomaru asked looking totally confused. Rin looked over to Kagome feeling herself slowly slip away.

"Kagome why? I warned you of the way things can change… what can happen if things don't happen the way they are suppose to," Rin said looking to Sesshomaru, "I'm sorry I had to do it Sesshomaru…"

"Do… what? This is ridiculous," Sesshomaru said shaking his head his long blonde hair flying everywhere.

"I wish you had killed me instead. 500 years without you is… was so hard," Rin said crying, "to think I have to do it again…"

"What?" Sesshomaru asked looking to Kagome for a little guidance and understanding, "what is happening?"

"She is dieing. It is Rin," Kagome said looking at him sadly. Sesshomaru quickly looked to Rin totally confused.

"Why?" Sesshomaru asked before looking to the women he loved in old age, "why am I not here with you if this is you in the future?"

"I'm so sorry I killed you," Rin cried swallowing, "but this all happens for the benefit of humans. You threatened all we worked for. You would have… you haven't changed yet. Oh… I shouldn't have said that."

"Changed? Wait… you kill me?" Sesshomaru asked looking back. She was always his weakness. If anyone could kill him… it would be Rin. She had the power to save him or damn him. He looked to the ground as she took his hand.

"I didn't want to do it," Rin said looking at him, "we had so… many wonderful moments Sesshomaru. Don't give them up… this wasn't suppose to happen like this. At least I hadn't been warned of it. Goodbye."

"We have to stop it! If we don't…" Kagome busted out in tears before grabbing Rin's clothing, "…if we don't then Inuyasha will also die!"

"I am sorry Kagome," Rin said looking at her before turning her head to Sesshomaru and looking at him one last time. Sesshomaru swallowed before looking to Kagome.

"Pitty," he said before walking out of the room.

Authors note: Sorry it took so long to get something new up I hope you enjoyed it! I am tired it is 4:04 AM and I have work yiksa! I guess I am just dedicated to you guys so don't let me down! Sorry I am almost positive there are quite a few mistakes I just don't have the time. I already re wrote this chapter and I NEVER re write a chapter I am going in a different direction with this now. I had a new and exciting idea to take this! I hope you stay tuned til next time folks!

Love4horses luvz you!


	17. 16: Listen with your heart

Chapter 16: Listen with your heart

Sesshomaru sat outside by the car. Kagome walked out crying as she shook. Sesshomaru could smell her tears but would not look at her. Kagome opened the door and sat in the drivers seat. Sesshomaru struggled with the door about to rip it off when Kagome pushed it open making it nearly hit him. He climbed into the passenger seat crossing his arms. Kagome looked to him teary eyed.

"Why aren't we moving?" Sesshomaru asked not looking at her, "I demand we move Kagome."

"Why are you being so insensitive?" Kagome asked looking at him, "pity? It's a pity? That was Rin you idiot!"

"That wasn't Rin," Sesshomaru said coolly, "I demand you take me back so I can be with Rin."

"That is who she becomes unless we change the future!" Kagome yelled at him. Sesshomaru just growled a warning.

"She kills me not you. So if you don't mind, be quiet and take me back," Sesshomaru said staring out the window as Kagome fell into another fit of sobs driving home. When they stopped in the driveway Kagome sniffled.

"Inuyasha dies," she said softly as Sesshomaru managed to find the handle and open it this time.

"Why do I care?" Sesshomaru said climbing out of the door and walking to where the bone eaters well was. Once he was back in his era he took off running while many things ran through his head. That was too much for him to take in, which changed everything… that changed him and Rin. How could he look at her the same after hearing that? Why would she kill him? Was she possessed? By the old woman's words it didn't sound as if it were an accident. Merely doing what she had to. But did she even try to… no that woman was wrong. An imposter… a trick from the son of Naraku that Kagome was so foolish as to fall for. That stupid human… so gullible those humans were. Those marks… she didn't look like Rin. The old woman's ears were pointy like his, and her eyes almost green.

'Not possible,' Sesshomaru said turning into a ball of light and shooting through the sky. The castle came into view.

--

Rin sat in the garden where a tiny man made pond rested in the earth. Rin splashed her feet in the water. She sighed wondering where her lover was. Rin hugged herself as she felt a strong breeze blow through. She smiled at the thought of his amazing face. It wasn't until she saw the white light coming her way that she knew it was Sesshomaru. She jumped up nearly slipping in the muddy mess she made as she waved at him. He was going to stop for her but he decided he couldn't see her yet. She stopped jumping and began pouting when she realized he had totally dismissed her. Maybe he was mad at her? Or maybe he just had a bad day. Inuyasha took off for the well to get Kagome who Sesshomaru so rudely left behind. Rin began to walk towards Sesshomaru's location when she saw Koga walk out in frustration. Rin turned and walked towards Koga. He smiled at her as she walked in his direction.

"Rin," he said politely, "I see that stupid mutt took off. I suppose it is for Kagome."

"You look like something is wrong. Is it Kagome that you still fret over?" Rin asked placing a finger to her chin trying to figure it out.

"No, I know Kagome and I would never work. It is Ayame… I feel horrible for not running to her rescue. I may have lost my mate," Koga said sighing as he looked at the ground, "I think I'd do anything to get her back now. Oh Ayame I am sorry."

"I will help you Koga," Rin said placing a hand on his shoulder.

"What… I think I have her scent on the air," Koga said before running in the direction. Rin chased after him not realizing that Sesshomaru was watching his mate, curious as to why her and the wolf prince were running off alone. A small growl slipped from his lips and he began to wonder… 'Does she kill me to be with him?'

"Rin?" Sesshomaru asked appearing in front of Rin making her collide into him and fly back. She hit the ground with a thud making Koga stop running and turning to look in their direction.

"What's going on?" Koga asked as he saw Inuyasha heading their direction with Kagome on his back.

"Go away you stupid mutt," Sesshomaru growled, "go worry about your own mate."

"What is going on?" Kagome asked jumping off of Inuyasha's back. There was a look in Sesshomaru's eyes that told Kagome she had made a mistake in telling him. Maybe that is how he changed and made it so she had to kill him.

"I am tired of him running off with my mate," Sesshomaru said angrily making Rin look up at him from the ground. Koga held his hand down helping Rin up.

"Maybe you should treat your mate better and she wouldn't keep running off with me," Koga said to get on Sesshomaru's nerves.

"Hey!" Rin yelled glaring at him, "I wasn't running off with you! And YOU how dare you not trust me!"

"Rin?" Kagome asked as Rin turned to storm off in irritation, "good job Sesshomaru look what you did. You won't be able to change things if you make her angry with you. You and Inuyasha don't know how to not make a girl angry."

"Hey!" Inuyasha said shaking his fist at her, "I treat you damn good woman! At least I am not like him!"

"Don't bring me into this dog shit!" Koga yelled shaking his fist in Inuyasha's face. Both were about to go at it as Kagome jumped in the middle screaming at them as the three screamed profanity at each other. Sesshomaru turned to go after Rin. She sat crisscrossed on the ground leaning back on her arms.

"Go away," Rin said not even looking back. She didn't know how she could sense those things; it must have been the fact that now they were one they were more connected.

"Rin…" he said before she turned her head to shoot him a glare before she jumped off walking over to him. She stood up on her tiptoes pointing a finger at him. She was surprised he didn't tell her to get away from him! So she went on scolding him.

"How dare you! How could you not trust me! Sesshomaru… why? Sesshomaru did you not hear me or were you just not listening… when I said I am yours. I know these times are a lot of trouble, but they are also good. There is always going to be a rise and a fall. Here by your side or a million miles away nothing will change the way, the way that it is the way that it was. Only you and I can undo all that we are now, that makes us so much more then a woman and man. Listen to me now Sesshomaru listen to me good and hard when I tell you I will be faithful and true, devoted to you and you alone… that is what I've had in mind since the day I found you again! Don't you see that forever you and I will be the ones that found out what forever means…" Rin was talking so fast her finger still pointed at him. She was cut off when he grabbed her wrist and pulling her into him. He held her so close that her face was buried in his chest. She wrapped her arms around his waist, "Sesshomaru… you should know I will always be there for you."

"I know… I only forgot for a second," he said squeezing her tight. His eyes watering as he tried to control his emotions from getting the best of his eyes. A single tear escaped from the eyes that held it prisoner… as the thought of the old woman truly being this sweet loving Rin he held in his arms that very moment, "Rin… I'm sorry I doubted for a moment your loyalty. I would climb mountains to be with you Rin. Just to be with you Rin… I would do anything. There is no price I would not pay, and just to be with you I would give anything… I would give my life away."

"Why are you saying this Sesshomaru?" Rin asked looking up at him.

"Because I heard a tale about a man who swam the ocean to be with the one he loves, but he never made it. I've never swum the deepest ocean but I've walked around the raging sea… and like I said I would do anything. I love you Rin. I cannot tell when or how… but you crawled into this Sesshomaru's frozen heart. You do not understand the fullness of my love, I know that you don't realize how much I would try, and I promise I would do it all again. And when my life comes to an end I want you to be able to say that I did it. That I gave you everything… that I did everything I could to be with you, that I gave my life for you. I want to give you everything, "Sesshomaru said into her hair as a breeze blew around them, "Just to be with you…"

"Are you alright? You don't sound like yourself," she said looking up at him. He smiled down at her. She loved when he smiled, for it was rare and not many besides her saw it.

"I am whole, Rin, I am whole. And so I am different, you gave me a heart of my own. Though some days I curse you for that, some day's I want to worship you for it. Promise me right here and right now Rin… you will never give up on me," he said touching her face. What had gotten into him? What was it that changed who he was? What put that fear in his eyes that he couldn't seem to hide? Rin swallowed as she reached up and gently stroked his face.

"You are my everything my lord. As you are my everything Sesshomaru, I am yours. No matter what the future brings… right here is where my heart will wait for you. No matter what happens… you can count on finding my heart right here waiting for you. Promise me that no one can ever take my place, that when my bones rot until nothing else is there… that even if you do take another by your side you will not love her like you love me," Rin said leaping up crushing her lips into his. He held the back of her head as they kissed.

"I promise," he whispered so that only she could hear before his words were carried away by the softly humming wind. While they were walking back she heard something calling for her. Something strange in the wind spoke to her. She released his hand and began to follow it as Sesshomaru followed her. Kagome, finally getting the 'boys' to stop fighting, slowly followed. Rin walked over a creek as she heard some chimes in the wind. The earth was speaking to her, moving with her every movement. Rin felt at peace as if there were no evil in her life. Sesshomaru watched as the leaves danced in circles around her. A woman with long red and brown hair walked out holding a staff. Pointed ears sat on her head. Rin swallowed feeling a connection to the girl. She heard a howl off in the distance.

"Hello… my sister," the girl said her hair blowing in the wind. Rin looked at her in confusion. Sesshomaru looked taken aback as his hand fell to his sword, yet he felt no threat here as she looked at him, "you are my sisters lover I see. Cute."

"She was an orphan when I found her," Sesshomaru said talking to her as Kagome's mouth dropped. She peaked out from behind a tree, "she has no family. You lie."

"I don't understand…" Rin said staring at the girl lost.

"Rin listen with your heart let it break upon you like a wave upon the sand… listen with your heart, you will understand," the girl said looking at her younger sister.

"She is my sister… yet I have no memory of her… but I know somehow she is," Rin said staring at the girl, "I do not understand. My mother and father died."

"Yes our mother did indeed die," the girl said looking at her younger sister, "it is time. You have died and now it is time to be reborn. You will lead our people Rin. Our mother and your father sent me away to take care of our people until the day you come of age. There has been a shift in nature and things are unbalanced Rin. I never thought you would come here, but you have come back to us. You are not alone… mother died for you so that you may live."

"What are you?" Sesshomaru asked hating the uneasy calm of this place. He lived near there but never actually visited. His father always warned of it. Stupid little fairytales his mother would tell him of this place.

"A Liosalfar… but her father was one fifth youkai. Which made her stronger then the rest of our kind," the woman said looking at her, "I am Rioka. Rin… we are elves."

"That's… not possible," Rin said before Rioka looked at the sky that was turning purple, "I do not understand."

"Rin on the fifth day you will have been fully transformed, you will then be who you were always meant to be. I must leave you now, but you can always find me here Rin. How I've longed to see you… my sister," the girl trailed off as she turned into the wind. Rin's hand was pressed to her chest as she looked at where her "sister" had been standing. She looked back to Sesshomaru who stood there casually. Rin swallowed before looking back.

"Did that just happen?" Rin asked not even looking back at Sesshomaru.

"I don't know," he said placing a hand on her shoulder, "we should be heading back now it is almost dark. Though the purple sky… tends to hide that reality."

"I don't know what is going on anymore," Rin said looking at the ground, "it just seems to be happening all at once. I don't know where I am heading anymore… I don't understand. Our life's story is being changed every second…"

"Rin our life story has been changing since the day you found me and the day I brought you back to life. I never imaged we'd end up mates but…" he said turning her to face him, "tell me your still here."

"What?" she asked looking up at the man looking down at her.

"Tell me your standing right here with me right now. Tell me your still you," he said touching her face. Kagome let out a breath wondering if she had been right about the old lady. How could Rin ever become her? Look at her and Sesshomaru… she gave that Sesshomaru a heart. How could she be the one to stop it from beating?

"I don't know anymore," she said a tear slipping from her eye. He pulled her into a deep embrace, "I don't know anymore…"

"Rin…" he said his head on hers as he felt the pounding in her chest, "near or far, wherever you are… you are in my heart and my heart will go on because of you. Rin."

"Sesshomaru," she said his name softly and sighed snuggling into his chest, "I love you."

"And… I love you," he said squeezing her tight, "we should go back."

"Right," she said looking at the man who was her destiny. He was her destiny. And she was his no matter what destiny brought them. He would enjoy what little life he had with her. Kagome sighed leaning against a tree before hearing Inuyasha and Koga running through the forest towards something. Kagome ran off after them. Kagome saw what they were running after… an unbalanced Ayame and a tired Kohaku helping her walk. Koga embraced his mate pulling her close as she fell into his arms. Kagome ran to Kohaku hugging him thankful he was still alive. Sango and them had been so worried. Rin and Sesshomaru were already near the castle both to tired to deal with any stress or worries. Life as they knew it was about to change, and Sesshomaru carried the burden of knowing it…

Authors note: Sorry this is so short. I am going to start working on the next ASAP. I just wanted to hurry and get it done so I could get it up tonight.


	18. 17: I belong to you

Chapter 17: I belong to you 

Authors note: Thank you thank you for all of your patience. Unfortunately is making it hard for me to post my stuff!

Rin and Sesshomaru had finished eating dinner. Things were still a little weird; they heard the doors slam open and the sound of nervous servants… and Kagome. Sango had opened the door to look outside when she sat Inuyasha, Koga, Kagome, Ayam, and… Kohaku? She gasped before slamming the door shut and running into her brother. Rin jumped up to see what was going on. Sesshomaru sat there watching her move. He just sighed as he watched her peer outside. He stood up slightly curious himself. He slowly moved that way. Kohaku was hugging his sister when he saw a smiling Rin standing in the doorway.

"Rin," he said letting go of his sister and walking towards her until he saw Sesshomaru step up behind her. Kohaku stopped in his tracks and then noticed the fresh marks on her neck. His eyebrows burrowed slightly before seeing the small smile on Sesshomaru's lips. Sesshomaru knew what Kohaku was looking out, now he could not have Rin… unless he killed Sesshomaru, which was unlikely.

"It's good to see you're alive," Rin said in her sweet voice as she placed a hand on his shoulder. She gave him a quick hug, Sesshomaru was uncomfortable with it but he knew that Rin's intentions were friendly ones with Kohaku. Rin was always such a sweet, accepting, caring girl. So how did he end up with her? He was brutal, harsh, selfish, and thoughtless of others. Until that day that he brought her back to life and let her join him. To think one small girl could put a beat in a frozen heart, and then later grow into a woman who completely melts the ice from his heart. She saved his soul, yet he was her hero.

"Yeah I suppose," Kohaku said looking back to his sister who watched him with protective watery eyes, "but I am tired. It is always good to see you."

"Yeah goodnight," Rin said before Sesshomaru took her hand. Rin walked with Sesshomaru back into the dining room. He looked down at her plainly. She loved when their eyes met. It made her feel special, powerful… and loved.

"I'm tired," he said looking down at her, "are you ready to go to sleep or did you want to stay down here?"

"I think I am ready to go to sleep," she said smiling up at him. He smiled down at her before walking up the stairs. She began walking towards her room before grabbed her hand, "Sesshomaru?"

"You sleep with me from now on," he said in his deep voice sending shivers down her spine as she followed him to his room. She had never seen what it looked like before. She smiled as he opened the door and walked in shutting it behind her. She looked around in shock as she looked at the white room. A giant round white bed lay with a giant furry white blanket. Why didn't it surprise her? She smiled and turned her head to look at him. He was smiling at her making her smile fade before he aggressively pulled her to him. She collided into his body with the pull of his strength. His lips fell on hers as she felt her legs turn into jelly, "I love the way you tremble every time I touch you."

"So you notice then?" she smiled as she smile between kisses. He looked down into her eyes as she stole his breath from him.

"Tell me we belong together," he said wanting to hear her confirm that they were supposed to be together.

"We belong together," she said before his hand slipped to the sash of her kimono and untied it with eagerness, "I thought you were tired milord."

"Not anymore," he said kissing down her neck gently nipping here and there. She smiled as her small hand gently held his neck as she leaned into his kisses, "don't ever forget this Rin. Us… you and I. I need to know that this is what you want."

"I want you, I want this… and I want us," she said taking off his armor and top clothing. She kissed his bare arm as he pulled her close letting the warmth of her body roll onto him, "just hold me in your arms tonight."

"Rin," he said as his hand slowly guided down her long neck as he kissed her cheek softly. She leaned into it feeling the warmth of his breath on her skin. His hands gently glided down her arms pulling off the rest of her garments. She stood there in front of his eyes nude, and did not hesitate to join her. She felt him back her up into the wall. She wrapped her arms around his neck feeling his smooth skin rubbing against her. He turned her around pushing her towards the bed. She climbed up backwards scooting back as he crawled up to her. She gave a small giggle as her hand cupped around his neck as he crawled between her legs. They sat there together intertwined in each other with no care in the world except for them. He kissed her shoulder before kissing her collarbone down to her firm breast. She could feel him wiggling his way up between her legs further pushing her back so she was on her back. She smiled up at him, as he looked down at her a small smile on his face. She gently touched his face placing some of his hair behind his ear as he leaned into her touch. Both arms placed on each side of her he gave her a couple of warning kisses that told her he was ready. She returned them gripping his strong muscles. She felt him slowly push in, she was prepared for it this time but it still hurt, as she knew it probably would for a while.

She felt his hand gently glide from her knee up her thigh, up her side over her breast, and placed it under her armpit. He pushed in and out getting more frequent and rapid. She gasped as her fingertips gripped into his smooth skin. A small smile came to his face before he too felt rather excited as he went faster feeling himself throb inside of her. He could smell the sweat already trickling from her pours. When they were finally done, she was laying on him. She could hear the rain pounding into the roof outside as she smiled at her love. He watched her attentively as her head laid gently across his chest her hair spread everywhere. To think that he had never liked the rain, they had so much in common. Like the rain he fell for her. She titled her head so her chin was right on his collarbone. A single drop of sweat rolled down her forehead onto her rosy pink cheeks. He smiled licking it from her cheek making her giggle.

"Let's stay like this forever," Rin said kissing his chin. He looked at her and sighed wishing things were that simple.

"Rin… that is not how life goes," he said touching her face, "but I wish it was. We need to be prepared for something huge. Something huge is coming and we have to face it."

"You talk as if I know nothing Sesshomaru," she pouted letting her two fingers walk across his chest teasingly.

"You just don't know what I know Rin," he said grabbing her hand and kissing it, "now is not the time to act foolish."

"I know," she sighed before turning her head so her head was on his chest. He wrapped his arms around her holding her close, "but I still love you… if that is alright with you."

"Of course Rin, if you didn't I'd probably force you too. But that isn't what I want… a forced love. I want a love of free will," he said gently pushing some black hair from her face, "this world keeps changing. But Rin… only you and I can undo all we are. I just hope that we don't lose what we have."

"Sesshomaru deep in the night and by the light of day it will always be the same… true love always is," she said letting out a sigh before lazily yawning.

"I love you," he whispered still afraid for the world to hear that Sesshomaru using the "L" word. She smiled understanding he wasn't quite there yet.

"I love you," she said before snuggling into his chest. He smiled looking at the sealing. How could he let such a fragile being… a human change him? How could he gain sympathy, compassion… and love for a human? But she wasn't just a human anymore, she was just Rin. And now she was Rin… his mate. He looked at her beautiful face that stole his breath. He was captivated, especially when he was hanging from her lips. He knew he was going to be her everything, and when he was older… he would be the greatest man in her life. The rain was still pounding as he listened to her soft snores laughing at the irony. He played with a strand of black hair. She scared him, she moved him, she loved him, she accepted him, she freed him, and she bound him down. For her he would fight his way back from the dead. He wanted to be her hero; he wanted to be her savior… he wanted to save her like she saved him. He sighed as he looked out the misty window at the black sky. Who out there hated them so much… they really were willing to destroy their love?

Morning finally peaked over the tall mountains way off in the distance. Sesshomaru stretched and yawned before looking at Rin who was there next to him. He smiled kissing her shoulder before she rolled over and looked at him with sleep eyes. That was when he realized he was completely hers, no going back, he from then on wanted to be a good man "youkai" for her. He opened his eyes and noticed something slightly strange about Rin. Her hair… was starting to turn red?

"Rin? What is going on?" he asked grabbing a strand of her hair. Rin grabbed a strand her eyes widening.

"Uh, uh… I… whoa," she said examining it, "is this… possible? Sesshomaru… what is going on?"

"I don't know," Sesshomaru said scratching his long silvery white hair, "for the first time this Sesshomaru doesn't know."

"This isn't good I thought it was a dream!" she squealed sitting up and running to a mirror. Sesshomaru sat up his broad pale muscular chest showed as the huge white fur blankets covered bellow his waist. He quickly stood up dressing in fresh clothes before walking to Rin who was rummaging through her changing hair.

"Rin," he said closing his eyes remembering the old woman's hair with its red strands through the grayness. Rin watched as he bit his lip keeping control. Were his eyes getting teary? "Rin… we really can't change the future can we?"

"Why would we want to?" Rin said curling into his arms. He turned his head so she couldn't see the spread of emotions. He pushed her away quickly walking out of the room. Rin held her chest looking at him. Sesshomaru walked as fast as possible feeling that the lights were going out, as if the darkness was surrounding him again. Kagome watched as Sesshomaru stopped wanting to turn back and run to Rin, but instead he leaned against a wall hating the feeling. Why this again? Why couldn't there be happiness and no war? How could he live knowing the one he loved, the one who spoke soft words of love to him… would take his life.

"Sesshomaru?" Kagome asked looking over to a sleeping Inuyasha. It was still early and Inuyasha and her had been up talking all night. He looked to Kagome and frowned before looking away, "are you alright?"

"Why do you care Kagome? I… I don't know what to do. I know I am alive right now, but I feel like I've died… and all that is left is to accept that it is over. My dreams are ran like sand, through these fists I can't get rid of. And I am growing cold again… and I am slipping away. I am becoming a Sesshomaru that is again cold and ice. The very Sesshomaru Rin brought warmth from. Now my whole world is the pain inside of me, and the best I can do is get through the day. Life before is now only a memory, and now I wonder why I am being allowed to walk on this earth. Though I can't understand why this is going to happen, but I know that when I look back and see how she brought beauty from ashes… and made me cold purified through these flames. She asked me to bring beauty from pain, but she doesn't see that she the beauty from my pain. How do I cope with this? How do I… Rin?"

"Sesshomaru?" Rin asked in her sweet voice making Kagome look over to him. Kagome smiled at him before laying a hand on his shoulder.

"I know how you feel. I will be left with a child without a father," Kagome said loud enough only he could hear, "so I am just thankful for the time left I have with him."

"Hmmm," Sesshomaru sighed before turning to Rin. He sighed as he pulled her into his arms. She closed her eyes sensing something was wrong with him, "Rin I'm sorry. You should know I belong to you."

"You belong to me? Sesshomaru lord of the Western Lands belongs to me? No… it is I Rin who belongs to the Lord of the Western Lands. It is I who belongs to this Sesshomaru. And I am glad I belong to you, I belong to you. You're the one who will never let me down, and so I belong to you," she said closing her eyes and resting her face in his chest.

"Rin…" he sighed wishing he could tell her, "no matter what happens… I do not regret it."

"Why does my Sesshomaru talk like that? Why does he wish to break my heart?" Rin asked showing just how cute she was. He kissed her gently, "does Sesshomaru not know the strength and length of Rin's love for him?"

"Sometimes he thinks he does," he said smiling down at her with a vacant fake face. She looked up at him smiling.

"Well tell him that before he was her mate she wished everyday on every star, every dandelion seed head, and every minute of her prayers that he'd be hers. And when Sesshomaru would look at her she'd fake a smile so he wouldn't see what she wanted and that she needed him and everything they needed. And she envied his betrothed, because she had everything Rin had to live without. You would talk to me and I'd laugh because it was funny, but I couldn't even see anyone when he was with me. You said you'd never love, and I hoped you were wrong… and I wondered if you knew that you were all I thought about at night. Sesshomaru walked by me couldn't he tell I couldn't breathe? There you'd go so perfectly, the kind of flawless I wished I could be… so I'd think she'd better hold him tight, give him all her love, look in those beautiful eyes and know she is lucky because he was the reason for the tear drops on my kimono. I use to fake a smile when you'd pass, so that you couldn't look into my eyes and see my heart beating for you. So stop hiding you emotions with a smile… what is going on that has you and Kagome talking?" Rin asked gripping some of his beautiful hair as she looked up at him with puzzlement and sadness dwelling in her beautiful chocolate orbs.

Authors note: Yes I know another short one! Only four pages! If that! But time is so short and I am trying to read others stories so I don't feel bad. I believe that if someone reads your story u should at least look at their stories! WELLL should he tell her and end the story quick? Or should he not say anything and let… all the next juicy stuff about to happen happen!


	19. 18: Cold as you

Chapter 18: Cold as you… 

Authors note: Thank you ArizonaBay and JENN2148! You guys have stuck with me until now thank you for your Rin like loyalty and friendliness! Makes writing all the more rewarding! So I have a couple of things planned… so keep in tune and give me ideas, encouragement, or if needed a little help!

"It is nothing Rin," Sesshomaru lied as he grabbed her arms comforting her. She gave him a look that made him laugh, "I'm just wondering on what to do with you? I mean… there are others that need you. Why should I be so selfish as to make you stay?"

"You don't make me do anything," Rin said smiling at him, "has that really been what's bothering you?"

"Of course Rin, I just think I am being selfish by keeping you here that is all. There is just a tiny battle in my heart," he said looking down at her touching the soft red strands growing in her hair.

"Well let me settle this battle in your heart. I'm not leaving," she said standing on her tiptoes and kissing his lips, "consider it settled. So don't feel guilty anymore my lord… I'm not going anywhere."

"That's what I was hoping to hear," he said pulling her close and looking down at her, "almost makes me want to rip the clothes you wear off."

"Sesshomaru!" she squealed with a giggle before placing a hand on his mouth, "save it for tonight…"

"I can hardly wait," he smiled giving a small chuckle and kissing her soft lips.

----

"Yes Sesshomaru… is that what really bothers you?" Naraku's son bent over a large frozen lake that portrayed the whole scene in front of him. The boy turned around and walked to two boys who were carrying something in.

"My lord we brought what you ask," the boy bowed before setting it before his lord. The long silver haired boy dismissed his servants. He grabbed the vase and opened it smelling the heavy perfumes, incense, and herbs. He set the golden vase down and then grabbed a green vase full of different items. Dead animals, certain special weeds, and other weird things sat inside the large vase. He then walked to the small black jar laced with silver ruins. He bent down in front of that jar and sighed, "hello mother…"

He gently tossed a heavy flames onto the frozen pond letting it slowly melt a hole in the ice. He then tossed in the vase letting it shatter onto the ice letting all of its contents scatter and slide. He then took the tiny black and silver jar and chucked it onto the middle of the items. He then looked at the golden vase before tossing it onto his mother's ashes and throwing another thing of fire to light it all on fire. The ice shattered flying everywhere leaving a girl with black hair in a black robe on the ground. Kagura took deep breaths before looking around and at her cold pale… living hands.

"Where… am I?" she asked looking around.

"Do not worry mother," he said walking out to meet the blackened women. His hand flew to her heart to make sure she was corrupted from the darkness.

"Why… do you call me… mother? I never had a child," she hissed looking around curiously. The boy smiled reminding her of her Sesshomaru.

"I was conceived after you died. I was born of you and a man named Sesshomaru mother," the boy lied smiling with wickedness. He drifted off to the day he was brought to the world.

---Flashback---

"This is where her body dissolved when I crushed her heart?" Naraku asked a tiny demon. The demon nodded nervously, "very well you may leave now."

"Thank you your grace," he said bowing over and over again as he walked out.

"Pathetic excuse of a demon," Naraku spat before looking at the spot Kagura had died. He laid out some stones before tossing some herbs down. He then called another demon that spoke special words bringing her body back from the dead. Naraku tossed some dirt onto her turning her into the ground before stabbing his hand through her stomach and pulling out a screaming child, "he'll do just fine. He will rule by my side and if I should die he shall be bred to destroy and kill with a thirst for blood and flesh. He will reap the flesh from the bones of men, women… and children."

--Flashback ends--

"You are to obey me," he said shoving his hand through her chest to grab a hold of the rotten heart learning to once more beat. She nodded before looking at her son and touching his face.

"I am yours to command. Where do we begin?" she said thinking of the idea of her and Sesshomaru having a son.

"We have a problem before we can be a family again mother," he said gently touching her shoulders, "there is a girl involved… look there."

--

Sesshomaru sat watching Rin walk in and shut the door behind her. She turned to him and smiled. He quickly stood up and walked to her pushing her up against the wall and breathing in her sweet scent. She touched his face still in disbelief he was hers. She smiled at him and she could tell he was giving her a fake smile. She could see loneliness in his eyes that shouldn't be there… not when he had her. Rin's smile slowly faded as she looked up at the man who stood so close to her.

"What is the matter?" he asked touching her face. She sighed before looking away. He sighed in frustration, "now is not the time for silence Rin. Give me answers."

"First you look at me with someone else's eyes…" before she could finish he pushed off the wall away from her.

"I look at you with my eyes Rin!" he yelled with anger.

"They may be your eyes but they reek of something hidden! Something lonely! Something that shouldn't be there!" she yelled pushing off the wall following him.

"I don't want to talk to you right now," he said hating he couldn't hide his feelings from her no matter how hard he tried. If only he knew that was the true sign of true love.

"Well I do," Rin said crossing her arms before he pushed past her.

"I don't Rin, so leave," he said opening the door. She walked to the door feeling anger take over. Why she wasn't scared of him she didn't know, but she took the door from his hands slamming it shut while looking up at him. He growled in anger, "how dare you."

"Don't talk to me as if I am one of your servants! All I've tried to do is be with you! Apparently it isn't enough!" she yelled aggressively putting her hands on her hip. He loved when she was mad. It turned him on so much. But that moment was not the moment to take advantage of her cuteness and love for him… and his overwhelming love for her.

"Rin it's just hard for me right now. There is a lot going on," he said looking away from her.

"Sesshomaru stop trying to be so strong. Sessh… Sesshomaru lean on me for once. Share your burdens with me. When you… feel all alone like the world has turned its back on you it's the hardest thing to feel. But give me a moment please Sesshomaru… to tame your wild heart. I know you feel like the walls are caving in on you. Sesshomaru when darkness is upon your door and it feels hard to handle… then don't hesitate to remember I'm here. Sesshomaru when you feel all alone, remember there is a loyal friend… a lover here for you. Forget the monsters in your head, and remember that when you feel like you can't face the day let me be the one you go to. If you jump I am willing to fall, to lift you up and fly away. Sesshomaru if you need to fall apart, then fall apart… your not alone. And when all your troubles are over you'll be okay… you will be able to smile a real smile again. But don't try and do it alone. It is too much even for a Sesshomaru," Rin said biting her lip, "so give me a moment to take your wild heart Sesshomaru. So that you can see you're not alone."

"Rin…" he said letting out an exhausted breath before sitting on the bed. She walked in front of him shocked when he grabbed her by the waist pulling her to him. She stood between his legs with his head on her stomach as he tried to control his breathing, "…Rin…"

"I'm here," she said hugging his head and she gently stroked his hair. He swallowed feeling his heart thumping wildly. '_I guess there are something's you don't question like how I see my future in her eyes. The funny thing is there is no reason except for the sense of completion. In her eyes I see the missing pieces… I think I have just found my real home. She is my whole world. She is my everything. My Rin. My love. My woman. My best friend._'

"Sesshomaru…" she said moving from his tight hug. She climbed onto her knees still between his legs. She reached up touching his face. He looked down at the most beautiful, amazing, human… unafraid to touch the face of a demon lord. She touched the face of someone… something once cruel, vile, selfish, and dark. She touched the face of something once ugly… looking at it with such love she was almost pulsing the colors of obsessive love. She touched the face of a beast never flinching, never showing fear, never looking at him any different… then she would look at a soft peaceful butterfly, "do you not trust me?"

"Rin?" he asked in stun of the seriousness in her question. She believed that he didn't trust her. Why? Why would she ask that? "Rin… you are the light on the dark side of me. I trust you more then anyone or anything. You are the only one I trust. You were the only one who could change me. The only one who has. Some days I curse you for it, some day's I wonder how it was you, and some days I worship you for it… and now I thank you for it. You're the only one I let it and will let in. Until the day we have our first child…"

"So… you are willing to have a child with me?" she asked looking up at him with such relief, "you wouldn't be ashamed of it."

"When… if you die before I do and… they will be the only children I love let alone have. You're my rose Rin… you're my… you're my everything woman!" he said standing up nearly knocking her back. He grabbed her shoulders keeping her balance before throwing her into his own arms holding her tight. Rin smiled before kissing him. He smiled down at her a real smile… a smile she wanted. Anything she wanted he would give. He just didn't know that yet. She pushed him on the bed before curling up beside him. He pulled her close laying his head on her chest just wanting to lay with her. They could have their fun the next night… for that moment he just wanted to listen to here heart beat and try to match it. He wanted to make music with the sound of their hearts dancing in their chests.

--

"Kohaku?" the boy asked through the refrozen ice. Kohaku looked through the mirror at the boy, "I need to check something. I need you to go into Sesshomaru's room where he lays with the woman meant for you, place this mirror over his heart."

"Alright," Kohaku said hesitant of what he was doing. Kohaku crawled out of his bed and walked down the hall slowly opened the white door that led to the lord of the castle's room. He shut the door leaving it open a crack, incase the need to escape popped up. He did as he was told trying to not strangle the youkai lord as he lay with Rin on one side of his chest. He placed the mirror over him as a hand reached out from the mirror and through Sesshomaru's heart. Sesshomaru woke up quickly passing out as the boy rummaged through his heart holding it tight. Kohaku whispered a yell, "your going to kill him!"

"Isn't that what you want?" the boy asked Kohaku making him think a second.

"No," he whispered, "at least not this way."

"Very well… I had no intentions of killing him. I found what I wanted," the boy said his hand leaving Sesshomaru's chest. Sesshomaru's pained face went back to one of a peaceful sleep as Rin's hand slid up his chest. Kohaku quickly snuck out of the room quietly closing the door. As he walked down the hall talking into the mirror when Sango walked out. Kohaku stopped and looked at his sister.

"Kohaku what are you doing out so late?" Sango asked before hearing a voice before Kohaku went, 'shhh!' Sango frowned looking at Kohaku, "whose voice was that?"

"What are you talking about sister?" Kohaku swallowed looking for an easy excuse.

"I heard a voice around you somewhere," Sango said looking at her brother worriedly.

"Sango there was no voices," Kohaku said thinking of a quick excuse, "it is your hormones from the pregnancy that is making you imagine these things."

"But you said shhhh right after the voice Kohaku," she said scratching her head and rubbing her stomach.

"You were talking a little loud sister… because of your pregnancy this is also common," Kohaku lied feeling horrible with every false word that spewed from his lying lips.

"Oh… okay," Sango said before looking at him suspiciously. She then smiled before patting him on the back, "I'll see you tomorrow kid."

"Alright sister!" he said before walking past her. She turned around quickly to look at him.

"Oh an Kohaku," Sango said with a smile. He turned and smiled at her, "I love you."

"I love you too sister," he said swallowing but meaning it. His sister went through so much to free him from Naraku's grasp. When Kohaku was in the safety of the room he let out a sigh, "so what did you find?"

"Just that things are going to be a little harder then planned. But I have an idea. I was looking at his heart looking for any lingering darkness and monstrosity," the long silver haired boy said looking at Kohaku through the mirror.

"Well?" Kohaku asked looking at the boy, "why would it matter? I mean look at that demon… he has monster written all over him. All of them do with the exception for Inuyasha."

"There is a little left in there but not enough for me to turn him," the boy said sighing as if bored already. A smile came to his face.

"What do you mean turn him? What are you planning?" Kohaku asked with curiosity, "is it going to help me get Rin?"

"It will help very much so in getting you your girl. Once we turn his heart darker I can possess him and he can then turn away from Rin into a monster that will do nothing but kill. She will be forced to kill him freeing her of her bondage… and I gain revenge for my fathers death," the boy said smiling at him.

"And how do you suppose your going to darken his heart?" Kohaku asked sitting on his bed. The boy chuckled feeling so smart.

"I will use a woman from his past. She will cause mishap… you may even see me. So be prepared, and if I need your assistance I may ask for it. You shall get your girl and I shall have what I need," the boy grinned making Kohaku shiver wondering if he was doing the right thing, "do not change your mind now boy. You are just as much in on this as I am. Go to sleep you need your rest. Things will be happening rather soon… possibly tomorrow after noon."

"Whatever," Kohaku said turning the mirror upside down onto his desk.

Night turned into morning and morning into the afternoon. The castle was in a buzz preparing meals as Sesshomaru was dealing with military things. Rin felt a little alone but decided that there were things she could do on her own. She walked outside and enjoyed the beautiful spring day. The sun swam through the clouds above her as she stopped practicing her arm at shooting arrows and laid in the grass. Rin noticed a little green youkai walking across the courtyard grounds towards a forest. Rin pushed herself up grabbing her bow and arrows before walking after her "father" curious as to why he was abandoning his duties to their lord. Rin walked for ten minutes looking for him. She waded through a field of waist deep green grass giggling as it tickled her.

"Hello precious," a voice came from behind her. Rin peeked over her shoulder blinking at the youkai unafraid. Rin swallowed but made no attempt to run. She knew that Sesshomaru would soon sense her fear. She slowly led her hand to an arrow and pointed it had him.

"If I were you I would leave," Rin said her voice strong hiding her shakiness.

"And leave such a pretty human behind? You would make such a delightfully, beautifully… juicy meal," he smiled showing razor sharp teeth. A couple of his friends joined him swinging chains and holding their swords.

"HELP!" Rin gave into her fear as she called for help.

"Silence yourself!" the man yelled pointing his sword at her making her drop her arrow in fear.

"Yes be silent… Rin," Sesshomaru said walking up behind them slowly and un-frightened, "go back."

"Don't move!" the black haired youkai with the jackal's face said as his warthog friend, and iguana's head youkai appeared by his side.

"Rin… do as I tell you," Sesshomaru said his facial expression never wavering never showing fear. He wasn't frightened nor did he have a reason to. He was lord Sesshomaru.

"But lord Sesshomaru…" Rin began before he shot her a look.

"Do as I tell you Rin. These lowlife youkai do not know who I am. So… I shall show them," Sesshomaru said moving his look to the youkai. Rin shook as she moved out of the way.

"It is you Sesshomaru… who does not know who WE the three are," the leader said before throwing an attack engulfed in fire at him. Sesshomaru stood there as Rin gasped shrieking as he was covered in flames. Sesshomaru laughed as the fire disappeared.

"You ignorant fools," Sesshomaru smiled with such amusement. Rin glared at him. How could he worry her like that!

"Shyouoo!" the one with an iguana's head shouted sending a green blast of sharp metals. Sesshomaru stood there as he quickly deflected them with out ease.

"One more shot," Sesshomaru said the corner of his eye resting on Rin as he tried showing off, "I would feel so bad slaughtering such weak morons without at least giving them chances."

"Youtra!" the one with a warthogs face said as a long stream of crimson red acid flew at Sesshomaru. Rin gasped biting her nails as he stood there a natural barrier coming up around him.

"Light whips," Sesshomaru said moving his hands as he tore the three in half. Rin smiled at him as he looked back at her. But a look of horror crossed her face, which made Sesshomaru quickly look back to the bodies that were… coming together as one? Once fully rejuvenated and formed they laughed.

"This is our true form you fool!" the large creature stood above twenty-five feet tall with three heads. A head of an iguana was on the left in the middle a jackal on the right was a hog. Rin gulped as she quickly pulled out a arrow. The iguana opened its mouth so that youkai of all kind came flying out at Sesshomaru. Rin flung arrow after arrow trying to destroy them. Rin's aim wasn't the best but it did the job, there was so many that if she didn't hit the one she wanted she hit a different one, which was good enough. Sesshomaru with ease used his light whips to kill a lot of youkai at once. Rin this time aimed for the heads. She let go and it stuck in the thick neck not doing much but irritate them.

"Stupid wench!" it called out ripping the thing out and looking at her before spitting more youkai in her direction. Sesshomaru jumped in that direction slicing through youkai with his nails and whips. Rin shot more after more why the giant demon laughed in their faces, "fear our true form you weakly youkai who calls himself lord! I shall feast on her flesh and bones in front your pathetic youkai eyes!"

"It is your pathetic youkai eyes that I shall pluck from your eyes after I tore the flesh from your bones," Sesshomaru said pulling out his sword. One of the heads spit acid, the other fire, and the other sharp blade like crystal. Sesshomaru ran towards Rin knowing that she wouldn't be able to last that blast. He grabbed her throwing her far away and taking the blast in the back. Rin hit the ground with a thud feeling rocks and sticks cut her skin as she felt her arm get jammed back. She grabbed her arm before looking at Sesshomaru who tried to stand the strong blast. Eventually the blast unexpectedly blew up sending him and shard everywhere. Rin gasped covering her head as she felt some shards land in her. She tried to not make a sound but couldn't control the squeal. Sesshomaru climbed onto his knees looking to Rin, 'she is alive.'

"Get up!" the beast cried lifting a giant blade, "get up!"

"In such a hurry to die are we?" Sesshomaru asked ignoring the blood from the blast. They were minor injuries. After sending a 'Sooryuha' their way he turned into the large fluffy demon he was. Rin turned over ripping the shards from her arms and back. Blood trickled down from the painful… blades. Rin looked at her skin, it was bubbling around the edges. Poison. Rin knew her body could handle it with all of its new changes. She was already growing weird longer ears; her hair was almost more then half red. Sesshomaru leapt at the creature biting it as he wounded it severely before he was grabbed and tossed. All of them bit him in several places. They sent more attacks his way as he stood deflecting them he then would attack them. Rin gasped as the large creature pinned Sesshomaru to the ground with his foot while the third leg kicked him repeatedly. Sesshomaru bit the bit making it bleed and dissolve from his acid saliva. Rin smiled in hope trying to catch her.

More youkai came Rin's way as she tried to fight. She felt one grab a hold of her arm with its razor sharp teeth as the others surrounded her. Rin punched the one off of her and grabbed an arrow stabbing it. She then shot the others and ran to gather all the arrows that had fallen and were still useable. Sesshomaru was biting on one of the necks tearing the head off as the others squealed. One took the blade and thrust it into Sesshomaru's side making him howl. The blade was pulled out and stabbed back into his side making him stumble back and transform back into his normal self. He fell in pain from the wounds and his arms. Still every time he transformed his arms burnt with a horrid sensation… and for the first time he believed he'd lose. There was no way he could do anything yet move his arms were nearly crippling him with pain.

"Sesshomaru!" Rin screamed before running to him. Sesshomaru looked at her in fear. Why did she have to disobey him?

"Rin run back to the castle!" Sesshomaru yelled in pain. Rin dropped to his side. He pushed her away as she tried to help him up.

"No not without you," she said as he pushed her away this time harder.

"Go now I order you to!" Sesshomaru yelled before softly saying, "I can't watch you die. And I can't die…"

"Then I will," she said grabbing his sword before he could grab her arm to protest. Sesshomaru tried to get up to stop her but fell down.

"Ha ha the mortal wants to play to. I always did like my food to wiggle before I ate it," the jackal laughed ignoring the blood rolling down his chest from the missing hog head. Rin puffed her chest out before placing the sword in her belt hoping it wouldn't fall out as she grabbed her arrows shooting them at him as he laughed. He sent a small wave of flames her way as the sword glowed blocking the attack. She looked in shock… she didn't know that since her and Sesshomaru were mates the sword would also protect her. They looked at her in surprise as she was still alive and not caracoled, "how'd you do that human?"

"Yes… how did you do that Rin?" Sesshomaru whispered as he tried to stay awake as he yelled for her to just run.

"I won't leave you Sesshomaru! I will die before I leave you!" she screamed making him feel worst, "I'm going to do this! And even if nobody understands I am going to make a one girl stand! It is my independence state I can't waste time on what they say! If we believe and we have faith we will change the world someday!"

"You fool," the voice said stepping towards her. Rin smiled knowing that Tokijin would protect her.

"Heh, I'm back again one more time. You couldn't keep me down last time, and I am still standing defiant against a youkai giant," she said smiling as they blasted another attack on her. She stood there her hands on her hips. Rin ran towards them her arrow and bow in hand. Rin heard a thunk and looked down to see no sword. She turned to run for it but the let out another blast almost like a grenade that hit her sending her flying. She screamed reaching out and grasping the blade of the sword not caring it was cutting her hand as it put up a shield still sending them through the air to hit the ground. Sesshomaru groaned trying to get up. Rin tried to get up feeling her body hurt in a thousand places as her body bled from previous wounds. Rin looked at Sesshomaru who tried to crawl to her. Rin reached out grabbing his hand.

"Go back," he whispered touching her face. She let a tear fall.

"No," she said before pushing herself from the ground. She felt something come over her as the wind blew her hair back. The rest of her hair turned red with the breeze. She grabbed an arrow her eyes a silvery color as she placed it in the bow and pulled it back further and further until you could hear the old bow starting to crack. Rin breathed heavily as she screamed, "Thastol Eisyrn and Vandrol shol!"

"What in the…" the giant demon looked at the flaming arrow and a tough gust of wind that made the arrow go so fast it show right through them making them go in flames.

"Xukuth d' Velthro!" she said as something like a blade sped right through the air cutting them in half making them disappear into nothing. Rin fell her eyes turning normal as she grabbed herself feeling drain. Rin got up forcing herself to go to Sesshomaru. He sat against a rock nearly unconscious.

"Rin," he said pawing at her touching her face. Your… alive," he said a tear falling from his scared eyes. She flung herself on him as he softly whispered, "…your alive."

"And your going to stay alive," Rin said ignoring her pain as she quickly pulled out some herbs that sat at the bottom of her quiver incase of emergencies. Rin quickly mashed them up covering the wounds to help his youkai nature of healing speed up. He was soon finally fully awake and aware as his wounds were healing. He looked at a damaged Rin lying beside him.

'She… ignored her pain and injuries to heal mine,' he thought as he gently stroked her hair. A scent came onto the wind before he looked down to make sure he was fully healed. He got up and lifted her into his arms following the scent. There he was… that devilish teenager the son of Naraku.

"So you two made it out alive I see," he chuckled making Sesshomaru glare at him. He set Rin down before taking his sword from her and attacking the little brat. He ran at the boy swinging his sword sending a devastating blow that blew up the trees. The boy jumped it leaping at Sesshomaru not expecting for Sesshomaru to grab the kid by the collar and tossing him to the ground his sword at his throat, "p…please."

"Sesshomaru don't," he heard a familiar female voice standing off in the distance. Rin turned her head along with Sesshomaru to see Kagura.

"Kag…ura?" Sesshomaru said lifting up from the boy almost in a daze. Rin looked to Sesshomaru her mouth dropping before she looked jealously at Kagura his first love.

"Sesshomaru… don't kill your own son," Kagura said walking towards him. He shook his head and looked at her.

"Not possible," Sesshomaru said looking at her, "I watched you die. We never had a son. We never did anything to have a child."

"That one night," Kagura said the breeze catching onto her. She bent down and touched his face, "and I am real again."

"You said nothing happened that night," Sesshomaru said swallowing. "I had been possessed and you said nothing happened."

"Of course I did you were possessed. I didn't want to hear the one I love say he slept with me on accident," Kagura said stroking his face as he looked at her with blatant disbelief, "and now… we can be a family again."

"I already… don't know," he said on able to look away from his eyes, "lets go back to the caslte and figure things out there."

"What?" Rin shrieked standing up ignoring her wounds. Sesshomaru turned to look at her snapping.

"I said we'll decide at the castle," he said with such coldness that it nearly froze over Rin's heart as it cried a thousand tears. Rin stood up and stormed off to the castle. Kagome was lying in Inuyasha's arms when she saw a tear streaked Rin storming out of the forest. Jaken walked out holding a book.

"Rin my daughter what's got you blubbering?" Jaken still didn't recognize that her and Sesshomaru were actual mates. He thought they were in a relationship, but had no idea of the bite marks that her long hair was hiding. Kagome jumped up when she heard Rin scream for him to move and not talk to her.

"Rin that was harsh," Kagome said in shock as she noticed the blood covering the girl and the bruises that plagued her. Rin's tears had nearly cleaned her face though. Kagome's eyes were wide as she tried to treat the girl. Oh the heartbreak in that child's eyes nearly broke Kagome's heart. Kagome turned to see Sesshomaru walk out with Kagura… and the son of Naraku? Inuyasha jumped noticing it and went to scold his brother while Kagome went to tend to Rin's injuries. Rin sat pouting in her room as Kagome walked in with medical supplies, clean clothing, and stuff to clean the blood off with.

"I don't want to…" before Rin could finish Kagome pushed her back onto the bed and interrupted.

"I wont ask questions but you need to sit still. If you want to talk then go ahead I'll listen," Kagome said tossing Rin one of her human spaghetti strap shirts. Rin put it on almost in shock that her boobs were a little bigger then Kagome's.

"How dare he," she growled as she put the shirt on and changed into the tiny shorts that Kagome gave her, "talk to me like that."

"Hmmm," Kagome said as Rin went on fuming her skin so hot to touch it felt as if her skin should be melting off.

"That medaling bitch," Rin spat catching Kagome off guard. Kagome looked to the door.

"Where did you learn that word!?" Kagome yelled scolding Rin. Rin cowered down before pointing down at Inuyasha whose fist was shaking in Sesshomaru's face. Kagome's face went red as she opened the window.

"Inuyasha!!" Kagome yelled making all of them look up at her, "SIT!"

"Ah!" he hollered before being tossed into the ground making Sesshomaru give a small snort before stepping over his brother. Inuyasha shook her hand and Kagome, "damn… her! Damn, you, KAGOME!"

"That is not a word for a young appropriate lady as yourself to say. If you ever say it again I will make you SIT!" Kagome yelled making Inuyasha who had half way peeled himself off the ground being flung back down. Rin gulped being terrified of Kagome.

"Jeez Kagome," Rin said cowering back, "did he really deserve a sit?"

"Yes. SIT SIT SIT SITTTT!!!!" she yelled getting her aggression out before sighing, "he promised me he'd stop speaking profanity. He has to learn not to for if well when we have children I don't want them being so disrespectful and dishonorable. Now let me finish this and go talk to Sesshomaru. I just need to bandage them, don't change until way later."

"Alright," Rin said getting up to walk down the hall to see Kagura and Sesshomaru in the hall as a servant was showing that brat a room. He grinned at her making her glare at him. She cleared her throat before raising her eye brows at him as he gave her a small laugh, "what? Do you have a problem?"

"Yeah," he said before smiling a surprisingly adorable charming smile. She swallowed pushing that thought out of his head, "why don't you come in my room and we discuss it."

"Never you pervert!" she screamed shaking a fist at him catching Kagura and Sesshomaru's attention. They walked that way and looking at the two.

"Why are you threatening our son?" Kagura asked making Sesshomaru look down not defending Rin. Rin's eyes widened before looking to the boy who smiled leaning against the wall. Kagome peaked out with a sad look. '_I wish I had another one of those rosaries to put around Sesshomaru's stupid neck so I could sit his ass… oops I mean put. That jerk_!' Kagome thought seeing in first hand why Rin kills him.

"Rin we need to talk," Sesshomaru said in a deep voice. Rin glared at Kagura as she walked past. Once Rin and Sesshomaru were in another room he sighed.

"Silence hu?" Rin asked with watery eyes, "so what is it going to be? Me or her? Excuse me her or I?"

"Don't do that it isn't like that," he growled, "I am just trying to figure things out. I didn't know I had a son."

"So what about me?" Rin asked folding her arms wincing in pain.

"Don't be selfish Rin," Sesshomaru snorted making Rin's mouth drop as her chin quivered hoping to distract the tears wanting to fall.

"What a shame," Rin said biting her lip with her arms crossed, "if anyone is being selfish it is you. You can't have two mates!"

"Why are you starting a fight Rin? There you go again!" Sesshomaru said pointing a finger at her. Rin looked at him with no expression finally getting it.

"I am starting a fight? If anything it is because I need to feel something! I need to know there is something still here! And yet you… you choose to toss me aside now that you have the family you dream of! There you go! There is your youkai mate! And you youkai son! Purebred that's all you've ever care about! And I stood there loving you in the worst of all the ways. Then you come around with a great little story about a mess of a dreamer with the nerve to adore me that you actually wanted me. Why when all along she was what you wanted?"

"She died Rin I never had a chance to be with her what are you talking about! I didn't think she'd come back!" he said making fists as his bones cracked. Rin stood there another expressionless look.

"Hmmm," she said nodding her head before walking past him towards a door.

"Where are you going we aren't done," he said walking towards her shutting the door. Rin looked up at him feeling drained.

"You have away of coming easily to me. And when you take you take the very best of me. Now… I have nothing left. Just walk away… while you defend those words of yours Sesshomaru. You defend them with your life because I can no longer here them. I am tired of trying, because every time you build these walls and paint them a stupid shade of gray. So just walk away Sesshomaru, because… I," she started laughing feeling as if she had lost who she was, "you never did give a damn thing about me. But I cried for you… and I was about to die for you. I was about to die for you. Oh what a shame… every smile you faked was so condescending counting all the stars you made. You know what Sesshomaru do what you want because I am not what you wanted."

"Rin," he growled as she pushed the door opened.

"Now that I'm sitting here thinking it through. I've never been anywhere cold as you," Rin said looking at him with angry eyes before walking out. Rin walked out of the castle in her funny outfit. Jaken and Sango ran out followed by Kagome, Inuyasha, and Shippo. Kohaku watched from a window trying to hide a smile.

"Don't go please we can leave all of us," Sango said trying to stop Rin.

"Please don't leave me my Rin!" Jaken cried hugging her leg. Sesshomaru watched out of another room. As she hugged them Rin let a tear down and shook her head no.

"I want to go on my own for once," Rin said biting her lips together.

"Where will you go?" Kagome asked placing a hand on Rin.

"Home," Rin said looking to the place she met her sister, "with my sister."

"Really?" Miroku asked in shock.

"Best of luck," Kagome gave Rin a death hug, "I know that… I will probably never see you again."

"I will always be around though. Even if my fait is to die… I will be around," Rin said touching Kagome's head before walking off towards the forest. Kagome followed behind the others storming through the castle with Sango and the others to find Sesshomaru. He sat in a room on his own with Kagura on the outside of the room.

"Sesshomaru you ass… I mean jerk!" Inuyasha yelled busting the door down.

"Get the hell out," Sesshomaru said staring at the ceiling.

"You guys leave," Kagome said glaring at them making them quickly exit, "why?"

"She'll come back," Sesshomaru said being arrogant, "she won't be able to stand being away."

"She isn't coming back," Kagome said making Sesshomaru sigh.

"Good," Kagura said rolling her eyes, "that makes this easier then without the little bitch around."

"I swear you better shut the fuck up before I rip your rotten jaw from your face," Kagome said slamming the door in Kagura's face making her squeal and fall back.

"Hey!" Sesshomaru said sitting up about to defend Kagura, "what the hell was that for!"

"Sesshomaru listen," Kagome said seriously. He looked at her listening, "she isn't coming back."

"So she says," Sesshomaru rolled his eyes.

"Your wrong," Kagome said looking at him seriously.

"How so?" Sesshomaru asked curious as to what made Kagome think Rin could actually stay away from him.

"She didn't say she wasn't coming home. She said she'd be around, even if she dies out there she will be around. But when she said it I saw the lie in her eyes. I couldn't get past it… her mind was set on never coming back. She isn't coming back," Kagome said looking at him seriously, "what would make her decide to never return again?"

"I've never been anywhere cold as you," Sesshomaru said looking at the ground realizing something.

"What?" Kagome asked looking at Sesshomaru curiously.

"I… I made her think. She must have thought that I meant because Kagura was dead I settled with her when that… wasn't true. I care more for Rin then I ever did Kagura…" Sesshomaru paused a moment deep in thought and fear as he realized he lost his mate, "the last this she said was she was never anywhere as cold as I."

Authors note: Sorry this is so long and no lemon! I wanted to get some action other then bumping uglies! So here you go I thought I would start coloring my picture (metaphor) basically I thought I would add a little more into. Including how that brat was born. I hope you enjoyed it may take a day or two for the next. Sorry this was so um… long and I thought I'd give you a little history and more drama. I'll tell you this Sesshomaru may think he can have a life with Kagura… but being without Rin brings the beast in him out. So keep reading. Sorry I made Kagura so hateful and bitchy… I hope you don't hate me for it! If you do think of it this way… her soul was corrupted by her own son who is a twisted little fucker himself! Night yallz!! PLEASE REVIEW! INSPIRE ME MY FRIENDS!


	20. 19: Falling

**Chapter 19: Falling**

Authors note: Well I am glad you all like the story! I'm glad it is really picking up! Yeah last chapter was a long chapter heh took me a long time but I wanted to get it all out. I am so bummed… I liked to listen to music when I write but one of my ear pieces for my headphones are broken. They are so tiny someone must've stepped on them. BA! Laterz and hope this one is just as exciting!

Rin sighed as she walked through the forest holding her as she shivered. She walked to the spot she had found out about her sister. It was all so fast and she was already changing. Rin let a tear slide down her cheek. She stopped walking and plopped onto the ground as she watered the earth with her salty tears. Loud sobs poured from Rin's mouth as she hugged herself with one arm using the other to support her as she looked at the ground ready to regurgitate. Rin sat there and let out a sigh.

"What trouble's you?" a females voice said appearing through the mist. Rin looked up stopping her sobbing and letting out a few whimpers, "why do your morn as if someone has died?"

"Because… my heart has died. Love has died," Rin said looking at her sister, "love is gone there is no more arms to run to anymore. I am all-alone now… there is no one for me to live for anymore. I can't let go though… I can't get over that I belong to him. I thought he'd be the one to never let me down."

"Sometimes life brings more pain then we can bare. But… there has to be something you can do," her sister said placing a hand on Rin's shoulder.

"Hope is gone, and I have no strength to stand on my own. Nothing helps… there is nothing I can do. I… don't know what to do or where to go, but I cannot go back," Rin said crying into her arms.

"Come with me, come with your people and learn. Learn who we are, what we are, what we can do… and who you are," she said holding out a hand. Rin swallowed before slowly taking her sisters hand. The two disappeared into a mist.

----

Sesshomaru let out a sigh as he watched the cold brisk evening air. It had been five days and no news of Rin. Some say they saw her in a foreign place and lived with a prince. Some said that she had vanished into thin air. Some said they heard her screams and the sound of the soul collector a night ago. Sesshomaru grinded his teeth as Jaken walked in with two scouts. Jaken had teary eyes.

"They said they found nothing," Jaken squeaked in a high pitch.

"What do demon says is true my lord. We searched through all of these lands. We followed her tracks and they just stop. We have heard many rumors. The two most frequent are she is dead. And the other is she lives off somewhere with a prince and will be wed. Some say by force, some say as revenge, some say instant love," the first scout said placing his hands behind his back as he stood in respect. He then bowed and turned to leave.

"I shall take a team out for further inspection my lord," the second scout said before bowing and running after the other. Sesshomaru sat still looking out at the same stars that had not so long ago watched him and Rin sleep and love beneath them.

"My lord I fear for her safety. And I fear Kagome is accurate about my daughters disappearance. I did not feel any restraint of leaving nor desire to return," Jaken said holding his staff waiting for Sesshomaru to take his revenge out on him.

"I need her," was all that Sesshomaru said. Jaken froze in terror afraid Sesshomaru would kill Jaken so he would not be able to let out peep, "but my mind knows not what I can do… Jaken."

"Look for her yourself. Or stay here with… your family," Jaken said realizing Sesshomaru might get angry, "but… you probably wouldn't have any better luck at finding her."

"As my mate she should come back on her own," Sesshomaru said closing his eyes remembering the night he took her under the morning sky. How could he forget the warmth of her breath on his skin and the smoothness of her porcelain skin rubbing against him surrendering to him her forbidden innocence? So badly his body ached and burned for her… and so badly his hear desired her as his own and he drove her away, "I will silence these emotions. I no longer need her. I will do what is right."

"But my lord…" before Jaken could finish Sesshomaru interrupted.

"Get out Jaken. And tell them to stop searching for her. She is nothing but a hindrance to me," Sesshomaru said throwing Jaken out of the room. Something had changed as anger brewed in his heart. Kagura walked into the room to see Sesshomaru laying on his bed looking at the sealing.

"My lord," Kagura said sitting on his bed. Sesshomaru didn't utter a word as he listened to the voice of the woman he once loved. Once. Not now… not as much as Rin. But still Kagura was there, not Rin.

"Kagura," Sesshomaru said looking towards her, "why now?"

"Why not now Sesshomaru my love?" Kagura said laying a hand on his thigh. Kagura took his silence as an opportunity as she crawled to him kissing up his perfect stomach to his chest and then to his neck. He stared at the sealing he gripped her arms flipping her over growling. Kagura smiled at how vicious his face was growing again… just the way she always loved it. Dark and dangerous… easily raged. She didn't like the pathetic weak love sick puppy Rin had made him, this was the man she craved. He looked back as he felt her legs slowly rise around him and the bottom of her kimono slowly fell down her thigh revealing her skin. He looked back at her swallowing thinking of Rin. Kagura lifted her face up so that she could kiss him. For that moment he let himself kiss her back. Why he didn't know… perhaps giving it a chance. Or perhaps revenge.

---

Rin sat in the beautiful village. She had been there nearly six days. Everyone had already loved her as her sister showed her how to properly shoot an arrow and magic that would increase it. She had learned a lot, like her red hair and green eyes only happened in spring and summer, but in fall and winter she looked normal. Rin smiled at a little girl who walked up to her holding a tiny pink flower in her hand. Rin took it and rubbed the girls head. The little girl lifted her hands to her mouth giggling before running with a waddle as she ran to play. The place was beautiful; it was always sunny and bright there. Their village was hidden from others by a spell that the group had kept away.

"So what do you think so far?" her sister asked smiling at Rin. Rin sighed before leaning back into her arms.

"It sure is peaceful and beautiful. But all this peace cannot take away the pain in this heart," Rin said thinking of Sesshomaru, "all this peace could never replace the love that my heart once held. Why her?"

"I don't have that answer Rin. But your people here love and need you. It is time we further your practice," Rioka said looking at her baby sister. They walked to the courtyard as she tossed Rin a sword. Rin looked it at and swallowed.

"I can't… sword fight," Rin said looking at it, "I don't think I've ever actually used a sword in combat," Rin said looking at the plain sword.

"Swords are vital to survival Rin. You cannot wield the sword of destiny until you are ready Rin. To save our people you must be able to wield the sword of destiny," her sister said very seriously, "but no ordinary fighter with an ordinary heart can so much as touch it."

"I… don't know," Rin said scratching her head. Rioka ignored her and attacked. Rin screamed leaping to the ground. Rioka showed no mercy and tried to slam the sword down on her. Rin gasped before placing the sword up and closing her eyes. When she opened them she saw the blades two inches from her face, "oh boy."

"How do you think most of our magic works? Every elf here can wield a bow and a sword. That is how we survive Rin. You must take this seriously," Rioka said helping her sister up and showing her the basic moves. For days they practiced as Rin's thought progressed to Sesshomaru. Every night she cried until there was nothing left to cry or until she was asleep. Rin was surrounded by love and adoration… but felt so lonely. Rioka woke Rin from a nightmare and pulled her out into the crisp night air. For an hour Rin was forced to fight blind folded being hit with a stick everywhere until she was bruised. Rin hadn't yet learned all her spells, which she really wanted to learn. Rioka had told her that the sword fighting was most important and then magic. Rin though cherished the one's she had been taught, though most required either the sword of destiny or her guardian sword which a ceremony for would soon be held. Rin dressed for the occasion as she walked down looking at a row of beautiful swords. She was told that the sword would choose her. And Rioka was right, a beautiful silver and blue engraved sword began to glow and silver color as Rin touched it. She lifted it up letting it glean under the moonlight.

----

Sesshomaru kissed Kagura viciously not being careful of his fangs. He didn't care he just wanted to forget Rin. He growled as she undid her kimono reminding him of Rin when she first sat below him naked. Sesshomaru quickly closed his eyes before remembering what Rin had said, 'I've never been anywhere as cold as you. I stood there loving you in the worst of all the ways,' he growled before throwing Kagura off the bed. Kagura hit the floor with a thump. Sesshomaru tossed her kimono to her and told her to leave.

"But my lord Sesshomaru," Kagura said trying to act innocent again.

"Get out!" Sesshomaru yelled glaring at her with crimson eyes. Kagura smiled before putting her clothes on. She slowly walked down the hall with a smile. He was ready. Sesshomaru sat there breathing heavily.

'When you take you take the very best of me. I start a fight cause I need to feel something. You do what you want because I am not what you wanted. What a shame,' he replayed those phrases in his head, "what a shame."

"What a shame? I've never been anywhere as cold as you," he said softly as let a tear fall as he hated her, "I hate her. I hate her. I hate her. I wish she died."

'Very good,' Yuka thought as he walked into the room quietly. Sesshomaru looked to the boy and set up still untrusting of his "son" as he saw his son reach out for him. Sesshomaru squinted his eyes and sat up as the boy's hands plunged through Sesshomaru's chest, "she'll be mine. She'll kill you relieving her of your mark… and then I will take her as mine taking her powers. And then I will feed her flesh to your brothers friends."

"Rin…" Sesshomaru said grasping at the boy as his heart went black. The boy let go backing up as Sesshomaru changed. He felt his mind and heart lose control as the poison spread the darkness. Sesshomaru stood up walking out of the room with rigid red eyes, as his marks got deeper in crimson. His fingernails were long and razor sharp, his teeth long and sharp. He looked as if he was half human half dog as his moon on his forehead went black. A little boy walked out and smiled at his lord.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" the boy said before backing up as Sesshomaru slashed at him making the boy yelp and fall playing dead as Sesshomaru went through his castle tearing everything apart. Kagome hid as she kept sitting Inuyasha to stop him from attacking Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru walked down to his village a thirst for blood. Kagome watched Sango run out of the castle. Kagome knew she was going to get Rin… 'This is how and why she kills him. Oh god!'

"Kagome!" Inuyasha yelped pushing her down before she could sit him again. She fell to the floor as Inuyasha took off after the village.

"Wait… that doesn't happen," Kagome said standing up. Inuyasha returned minutes later carrying a struggling Sango, "w…wait who goes to get Rin?"

--

Rin sat by a creek feeling a painful feeling in the pit of her stomach and a ache in her heart. She was caught off guard when someone walked behind her. She turned to see nothing there. She sighed before turning around and screaming when an old hag sat in front of her. Rin scooted back nervous as to who this woman was.

"Who… what… do you want?" Rin asked frantic.

"Don't kill him," the old woman said softly, "but go to him. Though he tries to kill you, may not even recognize whom you are… go to him. But even if he is not savable wound him… but do not kill him."

"Who?" before she could finish the woman stood up and walked off into the mist. Rin scratched her head before getting up. Rioka was grabbing bows and tossing them to the elven men. Was there a battle? "Rioka what is happening."

"There is a disturbance… the smell of a wild beast terrorizing and burning things. Soon it will spread here," Rioka said before Rin grabbed a bow and some arrows and running off, "RIN WAIT!"

---

Rin ran through the forest with great speed leaving the mist not caring that she was heading off alone. She headed for the village seeing the smoke and fire. The sounds of screams were heard throughout. Rin ran to the entrance seeing Sesshomaru killing his own people. Rin fired a warning shot as she stopped ten feet in front of him.

"Sesshomaru!" Rin screamed wanting to run into his arms. He walked towards her as Yuka stood off in the distance watching and smiling with Kagura by his side. Rin ran to Sesshomaru ignoring the evil that surrounded his eyes and the blood that covered him. She leapt into his arms as he stood there struggling with himself. His hand reached to her back for a moment before peeling her off of him and throwing her to the ground. Rin crawled to her sword and bow. Rin stood up as Yuka sent youkai in their direction. Inuyasha followed by the others ran off to see her facing them all. Rin looked at the horde and pointed her sword at them screaming, "Aes shadier!"

"Whoa!" Mirokua said watching the green light fling from the sword devastating the youkai. Rin took deep breaths as she… Kagome gasped.

"Oh god she'll kill him!" Kagome shrieked terrified. Inuyasha looked to Kagome and placed an arm around her.

"I'm going to stop it," Inuyasha said running down. Kagome ran to grab some arrows and a bow. Miroku and Sango ran back into the castle to grab their weapons. They were out there quickly fighting the youkai. Rin fought with Sesshomaru as he leapt at her swinging his sword. Rin gasped as each time he hit her sword harder and harder. Rin still wasn't all that good with a sword… but she refused to use and arrow on him. Rin turned to see the villagers grab pitchforks and weapons as they marched towards Sesshomaru. Rin saw Rioka and the other elves marching through the forest ready to battle the youkai. Rin saw the first arrow shot.

"No!" Rin screamed leaping onto him taking the arrow for him. Rioka gasped and quickly held fire as Sesshomaru looked down at her trying to fight it before losing himself again. He threw the tiny girl on the floor. Rin hit the floor with a thud feeling the arrow on the side of her. Rin lay there as Sesshomaru killed seven villagers before fleeing into the forest. Rioka went to go after him before Rin jumped up running past her.

"RIN!" Rioka yelled to her little sister. Rin ignored the sharp pain as she ran through the forest. She stopped as Sesshomaru's tracks stopped. She breathed in a lot of air and closed her eyes letting out a painful scream into her arm as she cried shakily holding the bloody arrow in her hand. She dropped it on the ground trying to control the shaking.

"Sesshomaru," she whispered remembering all the times. She stood up feeling sharp claws across her back. She screamed before falling to the earth her hair falling out of its ponytail.

"Foolish human running in here thinking you can test the might of this Sesshomaru," he said walking out from behind a tree. Rin stumbled to get up ignoring the pain. She lifted her shaky hand to her back pulling it back seeing the blood covering her hand. She looked at him nearly falling forward feeling woozy, "look at you now. You can barely stand. And you thought you could challenge me."

"Is it even really you?" Rin asked walking towards him, "Because the Sesshomaru I know would never act like this. Sesshomaru!"

"Shut up!" Sesshomaru yelled placing his hands on his head. He pulled out his sword in warning as Rin got up. He chased her as she kept dodging it, "fight damn it!"

"I won't!" she screamed pointing her sword at him afraid for their lives, "you don't try to kill the one you love!"

"Such foolish emotions you humans hold," Sesshomaru said before attacking her again. For some reason either control or for some power reason he wouldn't use his sword on Rin. He'd attack her but he could have easily killed her. He grabbed the girl biting her making her squeal, "your petty emotions led to this day. The day I can finally be rid of you and take up Kagura."

"Is that was this is about," Rin said holding her arm where he had bit her. Rin could feel blood all over the place. He slashed at her again missing twice and getting her collarbone making her fall back. Rin knew he was going to kill her. Rin knew it was her life or his right there right then. Rin cried as she grasped the bow and arrow in her hands. She laid on the grown until she finally had it grasped. She sat up pointing it at him.

"Hmmm," Sesshomaru laughed, "shoot me. Your measly arrow will do nothing to this Sesshomaru."

"Stop where you're at!" Rin screamed firing a warning shot that hit near his head. He smiled not stopping, "I swear to this very earth I will shoot you!"

"Do it… but make sure it kills me. If it doesn't I will kill you," he said as Rin grabbed her sword standing up, "enough sword games. My sword won't let me kill you."

"EEK!" Rin screamed as he used his green whip knocking the sword from her hands.

"Why didn't it cut it in half like the others?" Sesshomaru asked looking at his hand.

"That is no normal sword Lord Sesshomaru," Rin said grabbing and arrow from the quiver. Sesshomaru smiled running at Rin. As she released the arrow she said, "Xukuth d' Velthro! Forgive me."

"Always," Sesshomaru said softly as the arrow turned into a silver light hitting Sesshomaru and flinging him back. Rin flopped down unable to breathe. Where did he go? Rin ran through the area wondering where he had gone. Rin ran through a clearing to where the forest mountain dropped off to a far down ravine. Rin saw him holding onto the ledge bloody from the blast. Something inside of Rin made her turn to walk away. Her mind told her to let him go, for he was to weak to stay up.

"NO!" Rin's heart made her scream before she turned watching his last hand slip. She ran sliding off the edge grabbing his hand with one hand as she held onto the edge with the other. Sesshomaru's let a face of shock come as he looked at the girls face turn to one of pain as she fought to stay there.

"Let go," Sesshomaru demanded fighting the urge as his nails dug into her hand making her gasp.

"No," Rin said feeling both their wait make her slowly fall.

"Let me fall Rin," he said feeling the darkness slowly taking over again since he knew he would live.

"No!" she said trying to ignore the burning pain in her fingers and wrist.

"Rin let go!" Sesshomaru said as his nails dug deep into her flesh letting her blood trickle down making it slippery.

"NO!!!" Rin screamed feeling slip. Rin could still feel the pressure of his nails in her flesh, "Vandrol shol!"

"Rin…" he was about to make her let go when a large gust rose making both of them being tossed in the air. Rin landed two feet from where he laid dizzily. Rin crawled to where he was before quickly saying a holding spell.

"Vil'zra'quath!" Rin yelled making it so he couldn't move. He tried hard feeling the power of his evil self-taking control. Rin cried beside him feel weak. She had no more strength; she had no more magic left. She softly spoke, "I… should get up dry my eyes and move ahead. At least that is what you would have said. But…"

"Kill me or I'll kill you," he growled feeling her magic waver as he struggled to move.

"I can't, I can't… I'd rather die then kill you," she said scratching her head as she cried, "I never thought I'd be back here. I wish I were living a lie Sesshomaru. The hardest part is when I wake up… then falling down trying to forgive you for not stopping me. And since that day I've been choking on the words I didn't get to say and praying that I'd get the chance one day. But I am still the same Rin… I still run, I still swing open the door. I still believe you'll be there like before."

"Shut up," Sesshomaru said closing his dark eyes, "Stop it!"

I can still hear you smile in the dark; I can even feel you breathe. I see you as so cold and I fall apart. But to you those hints I'm clinging, thinking about all those moments hoping, pleading. Faithfully I trace your name while you sleep, it's the only true comfort I feel anymore my lord. Because I know something's a heart won't listen to Sesshomaru… and I'm still holding out for you."

"Rin," Sesshomaru said letting a breath as he calmed down no longer struggling. He was fighting so hard, "just kill me… spare me."

"Sesshomaru I can't find a reason to let go. Even though you've found a new love and she is what your dreams are made of, I can't find a reason to hang on. What went wrong can be forgiven, without you it isn't worth living Sesshomaru-sama," Rin's eyes puffed up with tears as she sat beside him, "I tried to let go of all of our memories. It was a time of love and laughter, I thought happy ever after. But even those memories have begun to fade. Please tell me she's not real and that you're coming back! Tell me even if it isn't me you choose your not giving up! With or without you I need you alive! What pride does she have to take your heart away… when for so long you were mine? I remember… when you were mine."

"Rin," Sesshomaru said sitting up making Rin jump. Before falling forward into his chest dizzily.

"At least… your alright," Rin said before softly drifting away. Sesshomaru looked down at her worriedly. Sesshomaru closed his eyes as a tear fell. He swallowed knowing she probably wasn't going to live very long.

"What… have I done," he said lifting her up into his arms before walking back to the town. The youkai were gone and so were Kagura and her son. They were off hiding since he sensed Sesshomaru breaking the curse. Inuyasha held his sword out before seeing that Sesshomaru's face was back to normal. Kagome dropped her weapons before running to check on Rin.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome screamed feeling Rin's pulse, "I don't think she is going to make it! This isn't how it is suppose to go…"

"I'm so sorry," Sesshomaru said trying to stay calm not looking down at Rin's pale blood streaked face.

"She would have been glad it was her and not you," Kagome said placing a hand on Rin's heart. They took her back to the castle doing everything they possibly could. For three days Rin laid there neither dead nor alive. She was among the living yet not fully awake. Some called it a coma and some said she hadn't yet decided on living or dieing. Sesshomaru walked into her room sitting beside her as he touched her face.

"I am so sorry," Sesshomaru said expecting her deep and fatal wounds. He shuttered as he thought about what the healer had told him. When she was on the ledge holding both of their weights where she had the arrow wound the skin was stretching making it bleed more. It would have been the most excruciating pain. Sesshomaru gently kissed her forehead. They had not seen Kagura or the boy anywhere, which for their sake was safe; he looked at the girl he loved so much. The girl who had given unselfishly, the one who kept him falling anywhere… except upon his knees. He got up and left to ponder the day away. One night when he returned… Rin was no longer in her room.

Authors note: THANK YOU FOR READING! I hope you keep reading. Sorry if this was a little rushed. Sorry this had to end there I have to go to work and I am already late lol! ENJOY! I'll start on a new chapter when I get home!


	21. 20: Confessions to change the future

**Chapter 20:** Confessions to change the end...

Authors note: Well what a day I've had. My arms and leg are shaky from a trail ride with my horse gone wrong! Instead of girls gone wild it was horse gone wild! Doing three eighties and wanting to run. Oh well enough dribble drabble and on with the story right! Sorry to all those I scared... the story still keeps going and so Rin is alive.

Sesshomaru ran out of the room down the hall to where Kagome sat with Inuyasha discussing important matters. Kagome watched as Sesshomaru stormed the castle like a white ghost. Kagome got up to follow behind hind him. Miroku sat touching Sango's stomach wondering what the baby would look like. Shippo sat munching on some chips Kagome had saved from her era. Sesshomaru stopped hearing Kagome behind him. He didn't turn around nor did he speak as he waited for an answer.

"Sesshomaru…" Rin began before looking to him suspiciously.

"Where is she?" Sesshomaru asked calm and hastily. Kagome frowned with curiosity. Sesshomaru's frowned hardened, "so she has chosen to leave. Fine…"

"I don't think she would just leave like that," Kagome said still standing behind him. Sesshomaru let his head lower as he thought about the awful things he had said to her. The very fact that he couldn't control himself with her probably frightened making her leave them behind again. His fists tightened as he thought about the fact… he nearly killed her with his own bare hands. How could he? No wonder why she left.

"You didn't hear what I said… you didn't see what I did," Sesshomaru said his knuckles cracking as he thought about the deep claw marks on her back inches deep. He remembered feeling his razor sharp nails tearing through flesh, tissue, and muscle. He then remembered how he had bitten her when his sword would not transform for him when she was around. It was because she was his mate. Soul to soul… and now she was gone.

"I'm sure it wasn't that…" before she could finish he shot her a glare that warned her.

"You don't know what I did to her," Sesshomaru thought feeling shame blend into his skin as he turned to walk away, "you don't know… what I said."

"Hmmm," Kagome said feeling that maybe Rin did take off to be with her people. Maybe Sesshomaru had something that hurt her, and maybe she scared him. Kagome was always scared of Sesshomaru… but he wasn't her mate. You'd think… he would have stopped when she threw her arms around him to take that arrow for him.

'You wouldn't have told anyone if I had died for you, I would have died for you,' Sesshomaru said repeating those words that Rin had said, "what a foolish thought."

----

Yuka looked to his mother who sat in a chair in irritation. She looked at the stupid girl lying on the floor still unconscious. Kagura sighed bored already with how things were going. Why would Sesshomaru choose this little human thing over her and their son? If only Kagura had known she had been lied to… that she was just another piece in a game once more. Yuka looked at the tiny shard that had been around Rin's neck along with the necklace Sesshomaru had given her.

"To think my father died over this little piece… the irony," Yuka said catching Kagura's attention. She looked at him replaying those words in her head.

"What?" Kagura asked her son nervous of what he was talking about, "Sesshomaru is well and alive."

"You do not need to act stupid anymore Kagura," Yuka said scratching an eyebrow as he looked at the tiny pink shard. 'I was told this was destroyed after my fathers destruction.'

"What do you mean!" Kagura yelled standing up threateningly.

"It means I am the son of Naraku not a idiot demon lord. I was created from his powers and flesh joined with yours, so that the day that he came to claim me you were already dead. I needed you so I could get to her," Yuka said smiling at his mother, "my plan is to kill Sesshomaru mother."

"No," Kagura said hesitantly. Why she cared after what he had done she didn't know, "you can't."

"Oh I can and I will," Yuka promised before watching the girl stir in her slumber a little longer leaving Kagura to her thoughts. Yuka looked down at the girl, 'my she is beautiful. There is no doubt about that. I bet she looks even more beautiful dark. I guess it is such a shame that all I need is her powers. I guess I could take her as my mate… but without her power she'd really be useless. Not to mention she's already been tainted with that Sesshomaru's 'stink'. What a waste of a body… my my my.'

For days Yuka waited for her to wake. Finally she did. She shuttered feeling hungry and cold. She placed a hand on her back and on her head as she tried to sit up looking around. Had she not broken the spell and he had taken her here? Or was she somewhere safe? Rin felt achy all over as she tried to dizzily look around. Yuka opened the door walking in holding a flower as a servant followed behind with a tray. Rin looked up at him with pure hatred.

"This was all your doing wasn't it?" Rin hissed with such dislike that hatred seeped into every word. Yuka smiled a charming smile that Rin already grew loving to hate.

"Indeed," he said bending down to her level not afraid of her. The servant sat the plate on the ground, "I am not such a bad guy you know. I am really quite reasonable. In fact… I brought you this."

"What is it? Rin said as he pulled something out from behind his back. He handed her a measly purple flower. She tossed it to the side not even looking at it. He smiled and shrugged.

"I thought I'd be nice since my plans have changed," he said smiling at the girl with such evilness she was actually frightened. He pulled out a black Shikon no tama shard making Rin moan, "I thought what a waste it would be to strip you of your powers when I can make them strong and make you kill Sesshomaru for me. Then I can take you as my mate and we'll share the powers…"

"Never," Rin said scooting away knocking over her glass of well water. Yuka's eyes glowed over a red color before turning back to it's not normal color. He quickly stabbed it into one of her wounds making her scream out as her wound grew around it healing her body. She screamed out in pain as she began to transform. She felt long sharp nails grow from the one-fifth youkai she inherited from her father. Her hair grew long and almost to her knees as canine teeth began to show. Her deep green eyes, once brown, were now a crimson red color. Rin screamed out as she laid across the floor her nails digging into the concrete as her pure side fought with the darkness. And epic battle… a painful battle.

---

Sesshomaru pouted outside watching the sunrise on the third day she had left. He sighed again thinking about the girl he willingly let go. The one he loved so much. The girls face he adored. That one he dreamed for. How could just the touch of her hand make him feel invincible? He sighed leaning against a tree as the sunset. He imagined her head there on his chest.

"Does she know just where she takes me? I need… her kiss like oxygen. But why? With her arms warm around me, when her eyes look deep into me… it's so unstoppable. With her anything was so possible. Why? Why… couldn't I just stop myself? I don't know how I even lived before her. Why couldn't she just stay with me? So I could once again swim in her deep brown passion. Oh Rin… I need to feel your love crash over me endlessly again. Whether you were right by my side or miles apart… I can still feel you in my heart. Oh Rin…" he said to the wind as it carried his voice away, "Where are you?"

'Sesshomaru…' Rin's voice sounded heart broken and scared as it was muffled away by the hurried wind. Sesshomaru heard rustling in the trees near by as an old woman walked out.

"Rin?" he asked sitting up looking to see an old hag walk in front of him, "what do you want?"

"To talk to you about the woman you were just talking about," the old woman croaked tiredly, "fait has placed such a hardship on you two."

"What is to you old hag?" Sesshomaru said calmly, "You stand in the light of my scenery."

"Excuse Me," she said with sarcasm as she stepped out of the way, "I merely have come to talk to you about her."

"I don't want to talk about that we… girl," he couldn't bare to call her any names, "she isn't here. She chose to be somewhere else and… she's so selfish."

"I can see lie in your eyes. Like I did the night I gave you back your arms," the old woman said looking at him. Sesshomaru quickly looked up at the old ones face. It was the old woman.

"Why do you keep coming into my life? Why do you keep helping me?" Sesshomaru asked hesitantly, "and I do not need help with her. I don't want to love someone who… doesn't love me anymore."

"And what would cause her to not love you anymore? That I never did understand," the old woman chuckled a familiar laugh.

"She has seen the monster I become. Not the monster that protects her… or the one that immediately calms down when she looks into my eyes. But the one… that would have torn her apart then and there if she hadn't shot that arrow," he sighed softly, "and now she is gone."

"She didn't leave you Sesshomaru. She has been kidnapped. If you knowing this doesn't change our fates then I don't know what will," the old woman said looking down at him before turning around and walking away, "the son of Naraku not you has your beloved Rin."

"Wait! Who are you?" he asked standing onto his two feet.

"An old friend who wants to rewrite history," the old woman said turning around and gripping a rosary before disappearing. Sesshomaru sighed before turning to leave for the castle. He stormed through the castle knowing he needed the armor and weapons. Inuyasha watched his brother ravage the castle looking for weapons and such. Inuyasha made sure he had Tetsusaiga with him as Kagome and the others quickly gathered their things. Sango made sure they realized she was going with or without them. They didn't argue with her knowing they'd lose to the hormones that beat inside of her.

"What do you think your doing?" Sesshomaru asked as he stared at the group following behind him.

"Not letting you die alone," Miroko said so happily it almost looked like sarcasm. But really Miroku was just glad to be battling again… though it was harder to win without the wind tunnel kazana, "I do not need your help."

"We know," Kagome said walking up to him with a smile, "but that's not going to stop us. So where is she?"

"Uh…" he said looking at Kagome in shock. They were serious! Sesshomaru gave a low grunt before turning to walk down the road hoping to catch the scent of something, "look for Rin's or Yuka's scent."

"Right!" Kagome said excitedly grabbing Inuyasha's hand. The white haired boy looked over to Kagome with a dazzling smile.

---

Yuka laughed as he watched Rin's soul finally lose control and become tainted by the shard and the spell on it. Yuka picked up the flower and blew on the top so that a purple dust blew into Rin's face. She slowly looked up at him with love, adoration, and loyalty. He placed a hand out ready to support her as she took his hand watching him on the way up.

"You were beautiful to me awhile ago, but this is who you should be. Your beauty now exceeds it's rightful place," Yuka said taking his newly charmed woman and walking out of the room with her. The two traced the castle until they were in the throne room. Inside of the new Rin sat the tiny Rin looking to escape. She screamed to her hearts content but nothing came out of her mouth. The new her was slowly dissolving the old her. So she sat in wait hoping that love would rescue her… that her love would rescue her, "do you know what I desire from you my love?"

"Hmmm?" Rin asked feeling her old self slowly becoming one with her new self at the same time. What a strange light fluffy feeling, "what do you desire of me my lord?"

"To kill Sesshomaru," Yuka said touching her long wavy red hair. She pushed her head into his hand as if an animal would to it's owner.

"Yes my lord, anything for you," she said making Kagura gasp. Her son had many tricks up her sleeve. But still she wondered how he was born… nothing ever happened between her and Naraku. Perhaps it was one of those desperate attempts to get rid of Inuyasha and Sesshomaru even after he was gone. That girl looked so different… and there it was! Kagura saw the black shard glowing in her chest. Kagura smiled before crossing her arms and leaning against the wall.

"My lord," a man said walking in before falling to the ground bowing with his hand to his heart. Yuka looked away from the beauty standing beside him on his arm.

"What is it," he hissed with wickedness and irritation. Rin looked irritated as well as she fond over her new love like a love stricken puppy.

"We are having some trouble with the eastern village Nuoka. They won't give up the goods and killed a good number of our men… my lord," he said not lifting his head. Yuka's lips rose into a smile before grabbing Rin's waist and pulling her to him.

"Let's go get our goods from those pathetic humans my love. And then… we can kill Sesshomaru and then… I can touch you in any way I please," he said looking her up and down as Rin smiled a fake smile. He walked forward her following behind him. First they dressed in armor and then they climbed the horses that were ready for them as Kagura followed behind at a safe distance trying to figure things out. It wasn't long before they reached the village that was in an uproar. Rin climbed off the horse dressed in black armor as her long red hair laid freely on her back as she scanned the people with a blank expression. The smile on her face, the smile on her lips, and the smile on eyes were not there. It was nothing but a giant vacant space left to loneliness and trickery. Rin took slow long steps through the village as she looked from left to right looking at the men guarding their woman, children, and goods, "Rin. Kill them."

"Uh," something in Rin hesitated as she looked back at the man before her. Rin fought with herself not to kill the innocent.

"Kill them Rin!" he yelled not liking disobedience. With one swing she sent out a black light that destroyed a whole family the sound of cries rang in her ears.

"She gave hesitation my son. Perhaps she is not as loyal as you think," Kagura smiled as she crossed her arms beside her son.

"Oh she will be obedient. She is just getting use to her new sense for blood," Yuka said crossing his arms while sitting on his horse watching her kill. Rin's heart cried out as one by one she slay innocent after innocent. A moment she would never forget. The sound of the dead haunted her, the sound of the living scared her, and the sound of her heart angered her. Yuka smiled as they ran in fear as his man set fire to their huts. The smell of blood sent Rin wild making her new body crave it.

--

"Do you smell that?" Inuyasha asked Sesshomaru who was deep in thought. Sesshomaru did not look to his brother but made a noise that pretty much said he did.

"What do you smell?" Sango said itching the back of her neck as she felt Miroku's hand slowly move to her butt, "Miroku!"

"What!" Miroku quickly put his hands in the air in defeat, "just something to think about as I die."

"Don't… talk… like that," Sango said before tears poured down her face.

"When did she get so sensitive?" Miroku asked looking at his blubbering wife, "what do I do? She's never cried before."

"You idiot! She's emotional… she's pregnant!" Kagome yelled as Miroku had a dumbfounded look on his face. He quickly put a arm around Sango. Inuyasha looked at Kagome with a worried face.

"Your not going to cry when you get pregnant are you?" Inuyasha asked before she glared at him, "Wait… what did I say wrong!"

"Idiot!" Kagome yelled ignoring him, "now what do we smell? I mean you smell!"

"Blood," Sesshomaru said trying to ignore the bickering couple and focus on getting to Rin.

"And flames," Inuyasha chimed in to keep the list going. Miroku looked to Sango who stopped crying.

"No one is dying sweetie I promise," Miroku said wishing she had just slapped him instead. He didn't like seeing her cry. It made him feel bad, and it annoyed him to feel bad.

"I know. If you leave me Miroku know right now I will… I will… bring you back and have you snipped!" she yelled not sure what to threaten him with. Miroku's eyes went wide and he sunk low.

"Someone whipped," Inuyasha said laughing at Miroku.

"So are you," Miroku Shippo piped in hiding behind Kagome who would protect him.

"Keh! In your dreams brat!" Inuyasha said before seeing Kagome's powerful gaze made him cower down, "but let's focus on one thing today."

"Right," Kagome said marching towards the direction of flames and blood. Inuyasha told her to get on like old times and she did. Kirara transformed into her demon self. Miroku, Sango, and Shippo jumped on and chased after Inuyasha and Kagome. Sesshomaru gave them a head start before zipping off in a ball of light beating them. They followed quickly landing in the village on fire. People were running and screaming for their lives. Kagome climbed off and looked at the river of blood that use to be a dirt road. They looked in horror at all the bodies laying around a girl whose back was to them. The long red hair fell down to her knees standing out against the black uniform and owner.

"Rin… my love," Yuka said climbing off of his horse before seeing the others, "you! Well… you saved us the trouble of finding you. I'd thank you… but I won't."

"Return Rin and we'll let you live on this fatal meeting," Sesshomaru said standing there casually. He never realized how much he took Rin for granted.

"Rin… kill him," Yuka said before Rin turned to look at them. They gasped at how much her face had changed. She smiled as she turned towards them and getting into a fighting stance, "Kill Sesshomaru… I will take out the hanyou and his companions."

"Yes my lord," Rin said walking towards Sesshomaru without fear. What had happened to her!? Had she been plotting against Sesshomaru all along?

"So… is this your choice Rin? The likes of him?" Sesshomaru said calm and coolly, "if I have to Rin I will kill you."

"Good… then I won't feel any guilt when I tare you apart," Rin said with cold white and red eyes as Kagome gasped and Shippo shrieked.

"Rin this isn't you!" Kagome screamed running towards Rin.

"Don't Kagome," Sesshomaru said simply.

"Kagome no!" Inuyasha yelled before Rin flicked her wrist sending Kagome crashing into Inuyasha. Inuyasha was ready and stumbled back but catching her. Sesshomaru turned around knowing she'd follow in order to get to. Rin glared as Sesshomaru turned his back to her walking away gracefully.

"Don't turn your back on me Sesshomaru!" Rin yelled following him. Yuka looked at Inuyasha and the gang. Rin ran after him ready to scratch at him before he flipped around grabbing her wrist and throwing her through the dark and cold woods. Rin hit the floor with a thud but pushed herself up. Rin sliced her hand at him sending green shards his way. He walked through them ignoring them as they cut his cloth and one cut his cheek letting blood trickle down in tiny droplets.

"Is this all you can do Rin?" Sesshomaru laughed sensing something wasn't right with her but ignoring it. If this was who she was… he'd spare her from realizing it, "a scratch on my cheek. Don't toy with me. Show me what you've got."

'Sesshomaru!' Rin screamed from the inside as if she were watching out of a window. A window she pounded on making her body place a hand on her heart in pain. She shook it off when the real Rin stopped pounding against the wall and slid down crying into her lip, 'lord Sesshomaru…'

"Shut up!" Rin yelled holding her head. Why couldn't she control her heart? "Sesshomaru you've not even tasted my powers!"

"Then show me Rin… what such a tiny girl can do," Sesshomaru laughed tauntingly as he heard Rin's soft voice in the wind making him look around before trying to ignore it. What was bothering him so much? What was his heart screaming blindly at him about? Rin through her hand out again sending a deep shockwave that nearly through Sesshomaru until set up a barrier, "Rin. Enough."

"I am not yours to command anymore," Rin said with such cold and bitterness, "I am not yours anymore."

"Are you blind or stupid? Or perhaps you just didn't understand the fullness of my love? I know you don't realize how much that I tried to give you. And though this is how it turned out, Rin, with not price I didn't pay, I'd do it all over again," Sesshomaru said in hopes he could change the girls mind.

"Stop moping and fight," Rin said clearly not listening to him.

"Good," Sesshomaru said using his green whip on her as she dodged them. Then again he didn't try his hardest. That is when Sesshomaru remembered.

'I didn't mean to. It was an accident, I had to…' Rin said when she explained why she killed him. This is the night he would die. And if he were to die… he would at least help Rin understand his flaws. She sent another attack at him that he dodged before she went to scratch him. He blocked every move before hitting her in the chest with his palm. No he would not die. And neither would she!

'It's not her it can't be! I know it's not… it's not Rin!' Sesshomaru knew it he couldn't deny it. This was it… and he was going to bring her back EVEN if it meant his death.

"Sesshomaru," a voice came from the entrance of the woods. Kagura walked in making Sesshomaru nervous.

"What do you want," Sesshomaru growled trying to keep an eye on the two of them.

"She has a tainted Shikon no tama jewel in her chest. I thought you might like to know," Kagura said before turning to leave. Sesshomaru swallowed before looking at her chest realizing the source of her darkness.

"Rin!" Sesshomaru yelled as she glared at him nails ready. She ran at him again leaping into the air. He grabbed her arms slamming her into the ground. Man what strength she had. She grasped his wrists pulling him down towards her before using her feet to kicking him. He flew through the forest with such force landing ten feet away. He pulled out his sword as Rin got up and slowly glided through the forest. She was caught off guard when a blast came from between trees flinging her back. She screamed covering her face before being tossed back, "RIN!"

"Eeek!" Rin squealed from the strength from the attack.

"It was to strong of a blast!" Sesshomaru thought out loud as he ran towards the spot where a large indent in the ground laid. Rin lay on the ground into much pain to move. He walked to her wondering how he could save her. The only way he could think of it was to kill her. He dragged his sword towards her shakily lifting it above her as he looked down at her face.

"Do… it," she said in a weak voice, "do it…"

"No," Sesshomaru said feeling a weakness that wasn't there before he dropped his sword and fell to his knees. He gently lifted the girl into his arms as she felt her body burn in pain at the touch. She saw the bottom of his lip shake as a tear fell down.

"Please," Rin said fighting the disease, "I… do it. Do it!"

"No!" he yelled pulling her into a hug, "I can't… I can't do it! Kill me take my life… but please I can't kill you. Kill me… before I can kill you."

"Why… won't you kill me? End the suffering," Rin said fighting the blackened shard.

"Do you, want… to know why? I have run to the ocean, through the horizon and chased the sun. I waited for the light to come and at times I would give up. You would wrap your loving arms around me, and with your love I over came the beast with in. You loved me when I was weak, you gave unselfishly… and you kept me from falling. You set me free Rin to live my life. You became my reason to survive. I have been on deaths doorstep with the door open and one foot inside. You loved me when YOU were weak, putting me before yourself… loving me above all Rin. You set me free. You did no one else. Rin… our love is beautiful. Isn't… this beautiful? Times will change but you remain my everything Rin. Still by my side helping me survive the divide amongst humans, youkai's, and hanyou's," Sesshomaru said looking down at his everything.

"Sesshomaru… I can't fight it. It's… to powerful," Rin said feeling her heart beat faster, "but… don't stop. Don't stop talking… I need to hear your voice."

"I love the smile when I look in your eyes, I love the way you laugh when you think I am being funny. And… no one could ever take your place," he said watching a tear roll down her face, "and when you sleep I watch you breathing. And when you dream I dream with you, because everywhere you are is where I want to be Rin. Everything you do makes me remember how much I love you. I am sorry that for a second I forgot. I remember the way you gently touch my lips with every kiss, and softly whisper that you love me. The way you ask that our loves doesn't die, every night just before you close your eyes. I believe something's are meant to be, and as sure as there is love yours is meant for me. Rin I need you. I need your stupid questions. I need your foolish ideas. I need your hopes and your dreams. I need your life, your love… I need you."

"Sesshomaru," she said looking up at him as her eyes turned back into the green brown color they were, "it's inside my chest."

"I know Rin, this is going to hurt," he said kissing her forehead before he took his claw opening her chest feeling the shard pulse in rejection of him. She gasped before feeling herself pass out as the shard popped out from her warm flesh. He caught it putting it in a pocket before grabbing his sword and lifting her into his arms. He adjusted her so on arm was over each shoulder as her head slumped over his left shoulder as he used one arm to carry her. He cleared the bushes to see the group still battling with a wounded Miroku and a hurt Shippo. Kagome, Sango, and Inuyasha were still battling. Sesshomaru stood beside his brother looking at the demon.

"MY WOMAN!" Yuka screamed in anger as he showed his true form. A giant lizard is basically what he looked like basically.

"No Yuka… my woman," Sesshomaru said looking to his younger brother giving a small smile making Inuyasha's eyebrows burrow, "ready brother?"

"Ye… yeah," Inuyasha said before holding up his sword, "Kaze no Kizu!"

"Sooryuha!" Sesshomaru yelled swinging his sword feeling Rin's magic add strength and power to it as Kagome pulled out an arrow letting it go as all three combined hitting the son of Naraku and destroying him. Kagura felt as her body once again was slipping away. The one who had brought her to life, had just been killed making her too turn into the wind once more. This brought peace to her… to be back where she belonged. The others looked around trying to catch their breath as they had all nearly died. Sango ran to Miroku and Shippo to make sure they were all right. Sesshomaru started walking back towards his home with Rin in his arms as he sheathed his sword breathing in her sweet scent. He gently stroked her hair with his free hand hoping she would not have any permanent damage from the blast, "my gentle… loving Rin."

Authors note: Well I hope this made up for the depressing last one! I suppose most of you guessed that she had died… I hope it was relief that she didn't. I will start the next and final chapter tomorrow. Wow… it will actually be finished! I think one or two more chapters of happiness for one very sad reader. I felt so bad! THANK YOU THOUGH FOR CARING SO MUCH! And thank you all for the lovely and nice comments you've left!


	22. 21: What grow's in the heart

**Chapter 21: **What grow's in the heart...

Authors note: Thank you all who've been reviewing! It means a lot to me (and I am sure Rin would feel touched for your concern) so I will get on with the chapter. Here I go…

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN INUYASHA AND HIS CREW! I do however own the plot… and ideas. You get the drill.

Sesshomaru walked through his castle with the tiny girl limp in his arms. He walked into a room that was white with gold trimming. A window was open as a breeze blew the white curtains around casting the light of the day throughout the room. Sesshomaru gently laid her down and kissed her forehead. He pushed some of her normal length hair back, as he pulled out the polluted Shikon no tama shard he though 'Why did they never just destroy this stupid jewel?' Sesshomaru sighed knowing it was a thought for another time. He sent a servant to get the healers. They all crowded around the girl trying to find the source of the problems as they began to fix it all up.

"Sesshomaru?" a voice said from behind him making him nearly jump. He turned around to see the old woman standing in the doorway.

"You?" he asked as the woman watched them work on the girl. Sesshomaru swallowed before asking, "Who are you?"

"Who am I?" she asked before pulling off her hood revealing an old woman with long gray and white hair.

"Ka…gome?" Sesshomaru asked looking at her. She smiled and nodded, "it's been you all along? But how… and why?"

"The future doesn't always have to be the same Sesshomaru. I learned that as I… well I found away to go back into the past. Originally we seal away the Shikon No Tama destroying it. The younger me can no longer return back to our time. So I found away to find the spot it had been tucked away and went back. I knew that the only way you and Rin could be together again instead of her original death was to give you arms and tell you to go after the son of Naraku. Then I told my younger self not to seal away the jewel but use it. Then I had to hope I could some how help you remember your love for her," The older Kagome said smiling.

"Why did you go through all that?" Sesshomaru asked standing in the doorway watching Rin. Kagome smiled.

"Love… your love for her, and hers for you. Inuyasha's love for me, and my love for him. Inuyasha would have been killed if I hadn't found away to get Rin out of there. I knew a Yuka's main objective would be you, so originally he gets you to become evil… and Rin not knowing it was a spell kills you as you nearly kill her. So once I informed her that she shouldn't kill you… I think it took me saying your name to make up her mind she wasn't going to harm you. Then I knew that he'd kidnap her and so I told you about her kidnapping so you'd chase her down and fight her. There was no doubt you'd win," Kagome smiled as she rubbed Inuyasha's rosary that hung around her neck.

"So… then I suppose that you knew what would happen after that. It was all a stage," Sesshomaru sighed as he looked at Rin's face.

"Not all of it," Kagome said swallowing, "after that I had to hope and pray. I had no idea you'd assume that she had truly chosen Yuka. But your heart knew better… and it was her heart that fought the pollution from that shard. Almost unstoppable… I had not expected for him to use that on her. I am glad things are different now… now that I am not left without my mate. Rin would have been cold, heartless, and lonely. Miroku and Sango too busy to deal with Rin's depression. I would have given birth to Inuyasha's child who then later searches for Yuka with Rin and they destroy Yuka… but my son also dies."

"Wow… how did you manage all this?" Sesshomaru asked looking in at the love of his life.

"A wise girl once said… sometimes life brings more pain then I can bare alone. When hope is gone and I have no strength to stand on my own. But she also said I belong to you. Which meant her heart would fly… only to shatter. I too lost and well… this is a tale for another time," Kagome chuckled knowing she had changed things, "do not fret anymore Lord Sesshomaru. Enjoy the company of the one you love. Enjoy the gift life can bring for you. Enjoy the sun, the rain, the clouds, and the moon… but most of all enjoy it with the one you love because I can no longer help change things. Goodbye Sesshomaru… give my love to Inuyasha."

"Hmmm," Sesshomaru sighed before looking at Rin nervously, "goodbye Kagome."

"It's the first time you haven't snarled at me when you said my name. I can tell my new life may not be as miserable as it was," Kagome smiled before turning around and leaving. Sesshomaru turned his head a moment before turning back to see a vacant spot. Sesshomaru turned to leave a lot to think about. As he looked out the window he saw a young Kagome running and a living Inuyasha chasing her. He hid a smile before walking to the main room where he would discuss ways to keep his family safe. Rin… Inuyasha… and Kagome. Oh and the others too of course.

"Rin," he sighed as hers generals and militia leaders argued over strategy plans. It was so boring and lame in there. He began to feel slightly suffocated as he stood up leaving the group.

"Lord Sesshomaru! Where are you going?" one of the men said making Sesshomaru looked back at them with curiosity. He just walked out of the room and down to where Rin laid the gentle breeze catching her scent and sending it to his nostrils. He knelt down beside the sleepy girl as he kissed her cheek. He kissed her forehead and down and left a small one on her nose. He took a deep breath as he gently left a tinny kiss on her lips.

"I love you Rin. Rin here I am… praying for forgiveness, and I can see you laying here. Here I go Rin… it's a heavy load. But I hope you can forgive me for all that has happened. I want to make it right… but I've never made anything right before," Sesshomaru said before touching her cheek letting a small tear slip from his emotionless face as it splashed on her nose before he turned to walk. He made his way down the stairs and out into his garden where he surprisingly always felt at peace. He stood under a whooping willow tree as it dangled all around him.

"Sessh…omaru," Rin murmured before slowly sitting up and rubbing her eyes wincing in pain as from the wounds. She looked out the window to see the large garden full of exotic flowers, trees, grass, and that man made grass. But the most beautiful addition to the garden was a handsome youkai lord sitting bellow a tree deep in through. Rin itched her nose feeling something we, 'was I… crying? Hmmmm.' Rin walked out of the room and down to the main entrance. The other smiled as they watched her walk to talk to the one she loved. Rin walked to the garden entrance passing through the small fruit trees that were sprouting pretty pink apple blossoms. She stood six feet from Sesshomaru when he caught her scent on the wind. He turned his head to see her standing there in the breeze.

"Rin," he said softly as Rin stood there unsure of what to do. Rin took a step towards him swallowing as she passed the trees long earth scraping branches that looked like whips. She stopped at the entrance watching him with an intense gaze. It had been so long since they stood in front of each other as their real selves. He walked towards her but she unknowingly took a step backwards making him stop in place, 'she doesn't trust me anymore.'

"Sessh…homaru? I don't know…" Rin said blushing before looking at the ground. He took a step forward slowly. He approached her so elegantly and slowly.

"I know you think I am a monster, I am a monster Rin…" before he could finish she quickly spoke up.

"Lord Sesshomaru!" she said quickly trying to stop her.

"Silence Rin," he said firmly making her tilt her head and looking at the ground. His finger found the bottom of her tiny chin and glided her face towards his. A hand glided over his hand.

"Rin you are the only one who can tame the beast with in me. Although I have done some horrible things and too you said some horrible things… I never stopped loving you. It was my love for you that saved me. You're my calm surrender to the rush of day, your… what I want to live for Rin. So… tell me that you… that we are meant to be. After all we've been through… here we are standing in front of one another. And the biggest test is to answer is… are we meant to be?" Sesshomaru said looking deep into her eyes. For a moment she was speechless. But Sesshomaru was nearly flung back as Rin jolted into his arms with force. He let out a breath holding her close wishing that moment would last forever.

"We wouldn't be here right now if we weren't meant to be together. Is it not enough for you that we got this far my lord?" Rin asked touching his elegant face, "have you changed your mind?"

"You are not so lucky," he smiled tracing her face with his finger. She smiled as she bent up on her tiptoes to reach his lips. He pulled her close as he deepened their kiss knowing his body and heart had been waiting for this moment. She pulled away and looked into his eyes.

"There is no monster here… only the one I love," Rin said making him smile before she grabbed his face pulling it to hers. He laughed at all the excitement running through her as she viciously pulled his face to hers. His hands wrapped around her waist as he kissed down her neck. She gasped smiling as her hand rested on his neck. She tilted her head making it easier for him to make trails of kissed run down her long graceful neck. He lifted his hand up her waist so that it was under her armpit on the side of her boob as his lips gently grazed hers. She laughed as he licked her cheek and then gave her a big kiss. He bent down low to her ear to whisper.

"Should we head back for the castle now?" he whispered softly sending chills down her back. She looked at him and shook her head no. A look of confusion came on his face as she pulled him back under the tree that was more then enough shelter. She untied her kimono letting it fall upon. He smiled and raised his eyebrows before slowly moving the kimono off enough to reveal her shoulders. He left a trail of kisses over her shoulder before pulling off the rest of the kimono and tossing it, "I will stand by you forever."

"And I'll stand by you for ever," she said smiling at him before kissing his lips. He smiled kissing her lips gently.

"You don't know how long I have waited to touch your lips and hold you tight," he said with a devilish grin that sent chills down her spine once more.

"Oh I think I know," Rin said smiling up at him.

"Rin… you should know I never really cared… until I met you," he said his lips tickling her skin as he spoke. She didn't say anything right away, what could she say to that except…

"I love you," Rin said holding his face so that his eyes were melting into hers. He smiled before kissing her. Rin made him fall to his knees whenever she could… and that moment was no exception. He fell to his knees that very second. She gasped as he hugged her tight his head lying on her stomach as he let out a breath he had been holding. She smiled her arms wrapping around his head.

"I'm… scared," he said making Rin's eyes widened. Rin fell to her knees to look into his eyes.

"Did you just… say you're scared? Why?" Rin asked holding his face so he could look into her eyes. She could always tell when he was lying to her by the guilt his eyes would hold.

"I fear that someday you may see something inside me you don't like Rin. I am afraid that something will come and destroy us," Sesshomaru said letting out a breath, "Rin you're my weakness and I think the world knows this now."

"Sesshomaru no one can undo what we are. I told you that we are going to find out together what forever means. Sesshomaru I've seen all of you," she giggled making him glare at her lightness in this matter, "Sesshomaru I love you. You should know I'd always be there for you… no matter what. And that's what I've been trying to tell you since day one."

"But Rin I almost lost you…" he said pausing as she kept smiling at him. How could she smile and shatter his heart all at once? "I said… some things to you I shouldn't have. You should know I never thought of you as selfish. It wasn't me who said those things…"

"Yes it was Sesshomaru," Rin said looking down and fiddling with his hair. She let out a breath, "but it's alright. Though it was you who said it… I know that you didn't know what to do. You were cornered and your only reaction was to hide your fear. It was I who should have been understanding…"

"Rin don't say it was your fault because it wasn't," he said touching her face making her look at him.

"Sesshomaru all of the problems have been my fault. I got you into this mess and so your reaction was my fault," Rin said a tear falling down making him look at her with more guilt then he could bear.

"Rin do you not see?" Sesshomaru asked squinting his eyes positioning himself so he was sitting crisscrossed. While she was on her knees she was still a little shorter then he, "for so long you were running so fast in the wrong direction because of me. You were trying… but as I grew selfish I sent you away. Rin if I hadn't been so selfish by showing up to see how you were you could have lived a normal life. And everyday with me the more I was bringing down… I was dragging you down. But… I don't regret it Rin, not anymore at least. You were craving for shelter and affection that you didn't get because your family had been killed. You were waiting for a hero to ride in and save the day… and then I came along and knew just what to say. And you gave yourself away Rin…"

"I didn't give myself away in the way you think I did. I gave to you of free will Sesshomaru… I was yours from the day I found you. I loved you from the day I laid eyes on you Sesshomaru…" she said before he pushed her hand away from his face.

"I was your destruction Rin," he said not looking in her eyes. Rin couldn't believe him!

"I have not been destroyed! There is nothing wrong with ME! I am who I am and who I am loves you!" Rin yelled pushing him angrily. He smiled up at her making her glare at him more, "Sesshomaru how could you! You're such an… idiot! You saved me! YOU saved me! Whaonjdj…"

Before Rin could finish her words Sesshomaru pulled her to him kissing her with such love. Rin smiled before wrapping her arms around him pushing him over as she lay there on top of him. His hand quickly pulled her already untied kimono off. She helped fiddle with his outfit quickly taking it off. He kissed her neck as he quickly flipped her over. She smiled up at him as he looked down observing her. The sight of her just stole his breath. How? How could she be the one to have destroyed him and rebuilt him? He didn't want to know anymore… he didn't care anymore. All he wanted was to spend every moment with her. He was done asking questions that were no longer important to him. He let out a sigh as he kissed her chin softly. She wrapped her legs around him loving the feel of his skin against hers. How? How did she get him? How did a human girl well not just a human girl **wink wink** but a girl of not status get such a perfect man? Well… youkai. How could someone so "plain" get a youkai lord perfect in almost every way possible? He gave a small smile at the taste of her skin as he slowly kissed over her neck. He sighed as he traced of the scratches he had left on her chest. Rin could feel the sudden change and knew what he was fretting over. She grabbed his face moving his gaze off of the soon to be scars and into her eyes.

"Don't worry about that," Rin said softly before smiling. He smiled before kissing her soft lips. She could feel him getting ready to enter and she wrapped her arms around his neck feeling his long silky white hair fall across her porcelain skin. She moaned as he entered feeling her legs wrap around him. He smiled as he deepened within her leaving kisses before he'd be too preoccupied with thrusting into her. He could feel her tiny body tremble beneath him. He began to quicken his pace feeling her fingertips press into his shoulders as she squirmed under him with pleasure meeting his beat. He watched her intensely enjoying looking at her almost more then what they were doing and the pleasure he was feeling. She moaned again sending chills down his back and it was that moment he realized… love was something you had to earn. He knew that if he hadn't already earned it then he would find away to earn it. He wanted to be a good man from that moment on. He wanted to be the one when all was said and done lived a good life, loved Rin, and always helped someone in trouble. And on the day they laid him down he wanted everyone to gather and say 'he was a father, brother, friend, and lover. He was a good man.' It was such a strange thought for that Sesshomaru… because never before did he want that. He didn't want that for himself… he wanted it for Rin. So she could say she loved a good man.

Both were breathing heavily when he finally leaked his seed into her. He slumped onto her feeling himself slide around since both were covered in sweat. Rin had probably moaned more then ever which made Sesshomaru all the more pleased. A thousand maybe a million woman loved Sesshomaru youkai and even humans alike. But Rin was the only one for him. She smiled looking up at her youkai as he laid his head on her chest slowly dozing off. It was the first time she ever noticed he was comfortable enough to fall asleep out in the open. When ever they were traveling or out in the open he was always awake watching over things. This time she'd watch over him. She hugged him close smiling to herself. Though he had brought her down quite a bit… he always managed to lift her higher then she had ever been before. He was her everything her whole world. She loved him. AND better yet he loved her. When he finally woke up he saw her fast asleep with a smile. He smiled before quickly dressing himself and then covering her up. He wrapped her up and then lifting her into his arms. Night had already crept up on them and he knew it was probably pretty late for she was shivering. Inuyasha had just walked out of a room to see Rin lying in Sesshomaru's arms most of her legs and her arms bare. All of her middle section had been covered, Sesshomaru tried to not turn red but couldn't resist.

"Made up I see," Inuyasha said sarcastically before walking back. Sesshomaru squinted expecting to get more from Inuyasha then just a little sarcasm. Where was the full-blown sarcasm… perhaps he was a little occupied on his own. He heard Kagome's voice behind the door he had just opened. Sesshomaru smiled knowing he could finally understand his brother and his father. But never did they have a woman like Rin… no one was like Rin. He opened the door with one hand still holding the sleepy girl in his arms. He gently laid her down making her stir a little before he rolled her over. He crawled in next to her watching her sleep. How could something so beautiful… something so amazing wants to be with him? He would ask her when she woke up. It didn't take too long for her to wake up, perhaps an hour or two. And every second of those hours his eyes didn't lift from her face.

"When… did we get in here?" Rin asked sleepily before stretching as his hand lay on her stomach. He looked down at her thinking about how much he had been blessed. Rin smiled up at him as the moonlight fell onto her face through the crack between the curtains.

"A couple of hours ago," he said looking down at her. She smiled before rolling over onto her stomach hugging the arm he had resting under her head, "Rin…"

"Yes Sesshomaru," she said her eyes closing as a small smile rested on her lips. Sesshomaru laid his head on one of the many pillows as he watched her peaceful face.

"Why… being so beautiful, loving, caring, and amazing want someone something with so much blood on his hands?" Sesshomaru said his face plain making Rin burrow her eyebrows before realizing that was a serious question. She grabbed the hand that lay on her stomach and kissed it.

"Because these hands are full of blood from those who wanted to harm us, to harm me and Jaken. It doesn't matter how much blood these hands have shed because when they touch me… they touch me with such softness I could never not love them," Rin said looking in his eyes and before he could say what she knew he'd say she spoke up, "no matter what they've done… it doesn't change who the person who wields them. Sesshomaru there isn't anyone who can take away my heart, and there isn't any man who can take my hand and steal me away. I love you…"

"Thank you," he said softly closing his eyes a moment repeating her soft, kind, and honest words, "these arms will never hold another Rin. These eyes… are blind to any other. These lips no other girl will ever kiss. And Rin this heart it will always feel like this. Rin nothing could stop me loving you, nothing could ever tell me not to. You were sent to me to make my dreams come true. I will never stop loving you. You gave me love strong enough to calm my heart Rin…"

"Sess…homaru," Rin said looking into his eyes unsure whether she was really hearing those words, "Sesshomaru I love you."

"I know," he said pulling her close to his chest, "you're my heart Rin. And your what it beats for. But Rin I don't know if I can ever be a hero… but I will be there for you. If I don't love you like your deserve… if I don't stop every tear your crying, and if I don't make your life a heaven on this earth I will die trying."

"Thank you Sesshomaru," she said a tear rolling down her face, "to think someone like me would ever get someone as wonderful as you…"

"Don't say that," he said quickly cutting her off, "don't ever act as if it is you who should be lucky to have me. It is this Sesshomaru who should feel so lucky. You've changed me into a completely different youkai Rin. And I want to spend everyday with you remembering that."

"Sesshomaru!" Rin said leaping into his arm making him laugh a laugh she hadn't heard. A laugh of complete and total happiness.

"Rin in a world of pretenders I am your defender that's always how it's been… so Rin count on me. When life isn't fair and there is no one there I will be. Rin for you will do anything, and promise me you'll always love me," Sesshomaru said knowing her love was what he craved and needed.

"Sesshomaru… you're the only one I ever will or could love. Every dream comes true because of you… and every time I look at you I see heaven, I see an angel lying next to me. You holding me… you opened my eyes to heaven," Rin said smiling at him as she rested her head on his strong chest.

"Rin… you're the only angel in this room, "he laughed making her smile. He was happy. He knew it and she could feel it, "Rin the sun in the sky on the sunniest day is so blindingly bright, but it doesn't compare. And I am lost in time as I watch you my mate, the one I love… shine brighter then anything."

"Your such a sweet talker," she giggled resting her face on her chin so she could look at him, "you should know by now that you don't need your fancy words to get your way with me."

"No… but it makes you smile. I love to see you smile," he said touching her face gently, "you might not think it but I've had my moments. I use to wonder if anyone would care if I died… if they'd notice. My normal thoughts was 'why would I care?' but really I always secretly wanted to say that someone would miss me when I was gone. But now I couldn't care less if anyone knew, if anyone missed me, if anyone even knew I had existed… as long as I died knowing I made you happy. As long as I became a man worthy of your love."

"You are…" Rin said lifting herself up looking at him seriously before he touched her face and cut her off.

"No Rin I am not… but I will be," he said swallowing feeling her gently move so she could lay on him again. He wrapped his arms around her feeling as if she was being wrapped in heaven itself. Rin woke up before the moon had left the sky and got up throwing something on real fast. She yawned feeling the cold ground against her feet as she walked out of the room down the stairs. She grabbed something to drink before looking out the sliding door. It was open as a breeze was blowing the curtains around as if to get her attention. Rin walked out of the kitchen onto the cold grassy ground as a light mist covered the ground. Rin was spooked when someone came up behind her. The old woman who had told her not to kill Sesshomaru had appeared making Rin smile in content.

"It is good to see you smile," the old woman said making Rin look at her with curiosity, "I have a feeling things will be fine for awhile now. Rin… it is Kagome."

"Kagome?" Rin asked before she pulled her hood off revealing Inuyasha's rosary around her neck, "but… what happened to you?"

"No it is me from the future, I came back to prevent horrible things that would happen in the future. Here," Kagome said handing Rin a book.

"Why does it say I wrote it?" Rin asked looking at it flipping through the pages and finding a marked page. She gasped reading it, "but… how?"

"It is a story for another time Rin. But I have come to tell you that everything is alright now. That I since great things ahead in your future… as well mine. But Rin you should rewrite this story here in the future. Rewrite it about what Grows in the heart, and the power of love," Kagome said before turning and leaving an in-shock Rin. The old Kagome crawled into the bone eaters well returning to the time she had come from. Kagome sighed as she walked back to her house before a little kid came running out.

"Grandma!" two little kids came running out hanging onto their grandma's legs. She looked down in shock before a boy with dog like ears walked out with a pretty human girl. Inuyasha leaned against the doorframe with those familiar god ears, but he had long silver hair as he watched his woman.

"Where have you been woman!" Inuyasha said before Kagome began crying running and hugging Inuyasha. He smiled wondering why she was hugging him as if she hadn't seen him for forty or fifty years. He laid his head on hers as he held her close… his Kagome.

---

Rin walked back with a smile on her face. She was thinking about what the old woman had said, but as she reached the castle tears flew from her eyes clinging to her long eyelashes as she sat in a chair. She felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her before turning her around.

"Why are you crying?" Sesshomaru asked looking at her glassy eyes. She wiped her eyes before setting down the book.

"I…" Rin couldn't say anything. How could she tell him that their original future was one of his death by her hands. Sesshomaru saw the book and sighed knowing.

"You were going to do it because you had to Rin," he said making her look up at him in shock. He knew? He went down onto one knee before gently touching the mark on her neck, "but this changed it. Our love changed that. When I think back on all those times, I am glad because I was blessed to get to have you in my life. When I look back, I can always see your face because you were always right there for me Rin."

"Sesshomaru… you showed me how it feels to have the sky within my reach. You gave me so much strength. I owe so much to you Sesshomaru… you were always right there for me also. In my dreams I always see you soaring across the sky to my rescue… because I always saw in you my light, my strength and… thank you for all the ways you were right there for me," Rin said tears still falling.

"Rin there will always be a place for you with me for all of my life so you do not need to cry. That future is in the past, and now we have a new one in front of us. Let this one be the one we write our selves," Sesshomaru said touching her face and kissing. She smiled and shook her head yes as he wiped a lonely tear from her eyes.

Rin and Sesshomaru from that day on never stopped loving each other, and some days it was happily ever after and some days it was a struggle. Sesshomaru being a lord had many problems to deal with, and Rin too was called on every once in awhile by her sister. But Rin gave her sister the power to take care of their people. But as life goes many threatened their safety and happiness, but still together they tried there hardest to stay above water. Love was all they needed to defeat any obstacles the world threw at them in their long lives together. But that… is a story for another time.

Authors note: Well what did you all think? I am thinking about either doing a sequel or perhaps… a whole different story with these two. I am not sure yet. But you guys should encourage me for the one you want to see the most! A sequel or a whole new story… that will clearly be different! So all of those who haven't review now is your chance to speak up and let me know whether I am not doing to bad with this kind of writing or whether I should stick with "Lord of the Rings" stuff **wink** I guess I am just trying out a little here and a little there! I am actually sort of sad to end it here… I think there was a lot I could have done… but didn't get around to doing. Now I am just dragging on because the minute I stop it means the end… wow... 116 pages... THANK YOU ALL IT MEANS SO MUCH YOU'VE BEEN READING. ESPECIALLY FOR THE REVIEWS!


End file.
